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Congrats, you have herpes, here's your owner's manual.

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Oh Geeze! I just got my test results about 2 weeks ago or so. I've had so many thoughts going through my head, and questions popping up every time I blink my eyes, that it's crazy.


I originally went to the doc because I thought I was having some hemorrhoid issues. I live in a small town, and the doc was asking about family so I told her about how me and my guy of 8 years had split but after about a month apart we decided we were going to try to work things out. She went on to ask about the symptoms I was having-crazy itching, serious discomfort, difficult to sit/stand/walk/etc. She gets me on the gyno table and ask if I had sex with anyone during the split, told her no. She asked if he had sex with anyone, told her that he said he didn't. She asked about oral sex. I thought her questions were odd-I was there cause my hemorrhoids were inflamed and I needed some prescription meds but told her we'd had sex right around the time we decided to work it out and he did oral, but I don't do oral. So while she's at the end of the table, and I've got my feet in the stirrups (why do they call them that, it's not like we are going on a horse ride or anything...geeze)--anyway, she's asking me more and more questions about my sex life....now, I've been seeing this doctor for 8 years, and I really like her, but I just want medicine to help shrink my roids and send me on my way!!


She scoots her stool back, looks at me, and says: "Honey, It's not your roids this time. I shouldn't tell you this early in the game, but it really looks like your having a herpes outbreak."


I sat up on the table and said: "WTF are you talking about?!?!?!" (Yes, I have been known to drop the 'F' bomb in my doc office...as well as other places).... She ended up doing a scrapping (whatever it's called) of what I didn't realize was a large lesion between my vagina and my anus. She ran through some basic info and started me on 10 day run of Valtrex, (just in case) which I've taken before when I get cold sores. She also did a full STD panel just to cover all the bases. (This was on a Thursday)


Starting Monday the nurse called 3 days in a row to let me know when a std test came back that the results were negative. Each time she called I asked about the herpes test, and of course it wasn't back yet. During this time I was using my "Google medical degree" trying to find as much info on herpes that I could, but of course every single website contradicted every single website! WTF?!?! My questions were not getting answered anywhere. I just gave up, and decided to ask my doc if and when the time came.


Finally I called the doc office and asked about the results and the nurse told me she couldn't give me the results over the phone, but the doc wanted to see me on Monday to discuss options. (??huh??) I asked: So that means it was positive? Nurse: well.....of course it was positive for 1, (me: yes cold sores since a kid) and yes you were also positive for 2, but don't worry, it's not a death sentence or anything. ((((WHAT!?!?!?!)))


I met with doc, I asked her a bunch of questions and she answered most but for some her response was: I'm not gonna bullshit ya, to be honest there's no, yes or no answer, or positive proof, or blah blah blah. She explained that there is so much contradictory info out there that even the CDC website contradicts itself on some of its std pages. She did explain that there was no way to tell how long ago I was infected. It could have been weeks or that it could have been in my system for years before I had an outbreak, or I could have had an outbreak so small and minor I never noticed (don't see how that's possible after what I felt with this outbreak! oh dear lord!!!) She did put me on daily Valtrex.


I still have tons of questions, with no answers, but every time I get a chance to ask, my mind goes blank.....I just really wish I got:

"Congratulations you have herpes....here's your owner's manual!"

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Welcome, @Smilee.....I think we all wish we got a manual when we were diagnosed. Or at the very least a knowledgeable health care provider.


The closest thing I know of is Terri Warren's book (The Good News About the Bad News), available on Amazon in the Kindle format. A *much* shortened version is this handbook to get you started: https://www.westoverheights.com/herpes/the-updated-herpes-handbook/


Warren is a nurse practitioner who studies herpes and ran her own STD clinic in Portland for over 20 years before recently retiring. So she has a lot of knowledge from both a research standpoint and a clinical practice. I recommend the book on here all the time because I found it to be a one-stop shop for everything I needed to know and it was written in a way that even a regular person can understand it.


Feel free to ask questions here as well. We're happy to help where we can!

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If you had cold sores in the past then you've already had herpes for some time now. Not a big deal, and not much difference between the two. Cheers


I've had HSV-1 for years, and learned to deal with it long ago.....but after that outbreak.....there is a HUGE difference between the herpes up high and the herpes down low. At least with the herpes up high I could feel, see, and knew what the warning signs were of when there was going to be an outbreak....not so much when this happened down low. No tingle, No little lump forming, Just full on itching to the point of wanting to use a brillo pad. Then a pain and discomfort so bad I couldn't sit, stand, or get comfortable in any way shape or form. I spend alot of time with my grandkids and am very act with them. I run 5ks. I walk at least 3-4 miles daily often more than that. I'm at the gym almost daily (I started doing this to lose weight, then found I like it)...and for that time period of the outbreak I could barely move....


So, yes...it is a big deal, and it is a HUGE difference.

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