We were together 3 years, had diagnosis in February and today we broke up

[K123]

I am feeling truly blue. My man and I were strong together. Life was good. In February I was diagnosed with my first case and we found he carried it. I got over the worst and we lived life. Nothing to do about it and we were committed, so just move forward, right? It’s just a skin thing. And I am healed and feel good and am on the meds to help it stay better...

 

Today he broke up with me. It’s not related to the herpes,but boy am I having a hard time just thinking about life ahead. I know I’ll be okay, but I’ll sure have a lot more trouble finding another compatible man now. I am broken hearted about loosing him and sad about the future. He says he doesn’t know why he wants to break up. He sounded like he really doesn’t know, I don’t see us getting back together.

 

I’m just really lost and really sad and I have no where else to say it. He’s a good guy and I’ll miss him so much.

 

Poo.

[keepingoptimistic]

Sucks you guys broke up. I'm lucky enough to still be in a relationship and have always thought if we ever broke up, to use herpes dating sites! X

[RegularGuy]

Sorry things didn't work! Remember that you are still the same great person you always have been!

Break ups can really hurt, and the self doubt can be difficult to carry. But you know rationally that you will move forward and be back to feeling great about things soon, which shows a lot of resilience.

Make plans to do things that excite you, that really helps me when I'm feeling terrible. Staying focused on things in the future has a big impact on how you feel now.

I'm sure you are struggling in your own ways with your own struggles, but many of us have had similar experiences and can truely offer both empathy and advice. If you want to talk to someone on a slightly more personal level, use the "herpes buddies" thread. It really has helped me (and continues to help) having someone to kick thoughts around with!

[K123]

Yeah, I started to look at those dating sites, and decided much time is needed for me to grow a bit before I look for dates again. This could lead to a very good time for me. I’m heartbroken, as we were wonderfully suited and had so much fun...but I can’t make him want to stay. He needs to want it for himself. So I’ll move forward and learn a bit about the new me as I am right now. More music will enter my life, and more time to be with friends too. So there’s a silver lining, right?

 

I will certainly start looking at the friends part of the site. It would helpful to have somewhere to talk. This disease has a lot of negative press and that noise sometimes brings me down. It would be nice to have a good pen pal!

 

Thanks for the boost. It was a pretty miserable few days and I just needed to shout it all out at the time. Getting the extra ideas is icing on the cake so I appreciate your kind words!

[HikingGirl]

Many hugs to you, @K123. Breakups are always painful. For what it’s worth, I’ve been giving myself a break from dating since getting a divorce three years ago, and I am so glad I did. I’ve just started to think about dating again in 2018. But it has been so healing and empowering to focus on me during this time. Including indulging in all the things my ex didn’t like to do. :)

[FunnyGirl]

Hi K123. I had a really horrible holiday season myself, when this virus pretty much took hold of my health and really just complicated my relationship in so many ways. I saw you posted in the Buddy section so if you want to talk sometime. Let me know. I feel like even though our lives are very different, we are kind of in the same place. xo