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Don’t know how to cope with so many changes

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I’m moving to university in just over a week and I had planned to take a herpes blood test at the end of the month. I have reason to believe I carry the virus because a girl I was seeing had a blood test in July and it showed she had been recently exposed (I was the only person she’d slept with or kissed in months). The results were inconclusive and she was meant to do a retest at the end of the month, but she’s just told me she already had it done and will know the results in a few days. I’m pretty scared for what they will be. 

My life is taking so many changes with moving into a new place, meeting new people and going on nights out. I should be excited but I can’t stop thinking about H and it will stop me enjoying myself. I’m not the most confident person anyway but I am alright looking and I’ve had girls flirt with me before so having to turn them down will suck (I was actually known as a “ladies man” by my old colleagues) I also have no idea how to tell a new partner I carry the virus without them running a mile. In a way I think it can be harder for men because the transmission rate is higher and women often have more choice when it comes to dating.

I’ll be at home when I find out her results which will determine mine before I take a test myself and I don’t know how I’ll cope with the news. I don’t want to talk to family because they don’t understand and I think I’d rather be alone to deal with it in my own way. I just want to know that despite the results I can still have an enjoyable time at university but I’m not feeling very optimistic. 

Kinda wish I was one of the 80% who don’t know they carry the virus...

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Hi newtothiss22

In theory you are one of the 80% who don't know they carry the virus because you don't know you have H yet until you get blood tests.

Don't run before you can walk, I know its not easy but try not to panic so much before you know for certain.

Remember, it is a crazy world & you may get your test back as negative, I hope so 🙂


5 hours ago, newtothis22 said:

In a way I think it can be harder for men because the transmission rate is higher and women often have more choice when it comes to dating.

I do agree with that, as I think its something like 7 to 1 for women v men on tinder matches ratio but I guarantee you its not easy for any women either dealing with this!

Good Luck

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