Tinder Mishap

[Notgoingthere]

So I haven’t been on here in awhile and I probably should get back on. Most days I forget I even have herpes and as my year mark gets closer I feel more and more empowered. That it will be okay! That people will understand. That men won’t always reject me!

Unfortunately, I just had a relapse in my self confidence. Out of boredom I got back on tinder. I’ve been taking a break due to some other issues. Either way I thought why not just talk to men see how that goes. Well as per usual I put on my bio that I have Genital HSV-1.. I felt it was easier that way because at least I won’t know they are rejecting me...

Well tonight I was swiping and I matched with this guy. First thing he said is, “is that a joke?” And I relied, “I’m sorry?” and he said, “your bio. What you have on there is that a joke?” And I said, “no it isn’t I do have genital herpes.” He basically swiped right to make sure I wasn’t doing some sick joke and bold faced rejected me! Then he had the nerve to educate me on herpes then blocked me! 

 

What animal would do that?! Do these people not understand how much pain we are in? How much courage and effort and will power it takes to put ourselves out there!? What is wrong with them!? 

 

I’m sorry I just need some support and to talk to someone about it. Thank you for reading! 

[alllgood]

I have yet to ever disclose and it's been a year.... So more power to you for your bravery first of all because I will never get to that point of openness with this. I genuinely envious, I just don't have the self esteem for it. So reading this, made me sort of validate myy horrible feelings of myself, but also, fuck this guy! You sound like an awesome person and this seriously pisses me off. People like that are the reason people like me feel the need to hide away. I'm so sorry this happened to you, but at least you're not alone in his insult, he insulted every single one of us on this forum, we're all in it together. 

I hope some day soon I have the courage to disclose to someone I truly like and trust and it ends up working out. 

[Amando]

What an idiot!

I admire your bravery for putting it in your bio, sadly it still seems to attract some assholes but I'm sure that most guys
that swipe/chat to you will be decent.

I know these things don't help but let it stop you, keep swiping !

best of luck to you 🙂👍

[Notgoingthere]

Let me tell you guys! NO ONE should ever make us want to hide! NO ONE should have that power! We have it and that is that! I understand the fear, but I’ve also had a lot of guys be okay with it. Just don’t let Herpes drag you down it should have that power over you! I know it’s hard but if you need to talk let me know! @alllgood please please please do it when you are ready! I put myself out there because I want it to be normalized! 1 in 6 people have herpes. And 3 million people get diagnosed with it every year! I refuse to let assholes drag me down! Please don’t let this scare you!  I met a man who was okay with it. He did his research and was perfectly fine with it... he turned out to be an asshole for different reasons, but he was cool with the herpes.  Let me know if you have questions