So here is my story of how I become hsv2 positive Feb 2018, I started talking to a guy online and we seemed to get on well and he was six years older than me so presumed he would be mature and was open with him from the start that I would like a relationship with the right person so we were on the same page of what we both wanted prior to meeting.
The week leading up to meeting he mentioned he wasn't well had flu type symptoms and achey so I asked whether it's best to cancel but he re-assured me that he felt better. The day went well,we seemed to get on very well and one thing led to another and he ended up giving me oral and then we had (stupidly I know unprotected) sex I did mention before hand that I recently went to the clinic and got the all clear (as I always take my health seriously by making sure I get tested before having sex with a new sexual partner but as most people can admit that condoms are used but there are the odd occasions when you don't, because I always made sure I was clear of anything I was naive and too trusting and presumed that they would be the same seen as I am very open and honest from the start) He was adament that he was clean and the whole experience wasn't great, it was very rough but didn't want to say anything in fear or spoiling the moment but was left so swollen and sore after,I remember not sleeping that night, silently crying because of the pain and due to having to put ice in a kitchen towel to take the swelling down,He didnt seem to care or show any comfort which then rang alarm bells for me.
Days after I went to the doctors because the pain wasn't easing, she gave me some cream to apply thinking that my skin could just be sensitive and hopefully in a few more days heal but it didn't it was becoming worse, the most imaginable pain I have ever been in, I was soo achey, very very painful down below, when I went to the toilet it felt like I was sitting on ice cubes, couldn't sleep due to the pain and discomfort and couldn't walk,couldn't sit down, I spent two months back and forth to both sexual health clinic and doctors as they wasn't sure whether it was herpes or a bartholin cyst. I was on so much medication, took salt baths, warm and cool flannels, loose clothing, pain killers everything I could and it wouldn't get better. I began wanting to end my life to stop the pain (I have had a natural pain free birth 5 years ago to this so I have really good pain threshold which just shows the amount of pain I was in was horrific) My mum and best friend who I confided with as I was getting too unwell to look after my son which was heartbreaking for me was soo worried,I was on so much medication and the pain was so severe I ended up fainting,luckily my mum came round to check if I was ok when it happened and caught me till I come back round.
I finally got diagnosed in March with Hsv2 as I had a flare up of tiny blisters (this didn't look no where near as bad as on the photos on google) which showed it was a hsv2 outbreak from a swab test. I was angry and devastated when I got the result, I rang the guy to tell him (conversations started quieting down weeks after we met going from everyday talking to nothing, which made me think was he aware when he knew I was ill after we slept together beacuse he had a guilty conscience??) He told me that he has never had any problems down below but then I found out that he had gone to the doctors because still felt unwell and had a swollen lymph node in his armpit,he told me the doctor prescribed him antibiotics and didn't know why he had it but it just all summed it up for me the swollen gland, headaches,feeling fluey as I researched online and these are all the symptoms in a male being hsv2 positive,he got nasty on the phone as I was upset telling him how he could treat me like this and how he would feel if someone did the same to his daughter) he told me to f off and we havent spoken or seen eachother since and never will.
He has given me this for life that I have to live anf suffer with, he has just been able to walk away without any care.
Since my diagnosis I had outbreaks every week and then every 10 days now,I take acyclivor when I feel a flare up and the doctor has now accepted to put me on a daily dose of this medication in hope to stop or be less frequent with the outbreaks to take for 6 months to see how I go.
I am hoping this works as it's now making me depressed when I get a flare up as it's so painful and effects my day to day life. I have never had to go to the doctors so much in my life until getting this. I have considered suicide previously as I just don't want to go through life with these painful outbreaks and so glad I am not in a relationship as the intimate part of it would probably put a strain on it and if the outbreaks continue the way they have been then I won't ever be able to have the sex life I once had. As I have a very high sex drive I used to have sex everyday and even several times a day when I was in a long term relationship and I feel I will never be able to have this sex life again.
So sorry it's long to read but I just wanted to be open about it all to see if it helps people who can relate going through the same or if there are anyone out there that started off the same with the outbreaks in the first year that can re-assure me that I won't be going through this year in year out as it has totally changed my life for the worst! When I pick myself up and get on with my life it hits me back down again with an outbreak..it's a vicious cycle!
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