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Anonymous88

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Anonymous88 last won the day on December 8

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  1. Anonymous88

    Rejected, my first time

    If I am dating someone and I havent suffered an outbreak for 7 months then why make it a problem when its not?
  2. Anonymous88

    Rejected, my first time

    I spoke to the uk professional helpline and she said why would you need to disclose. We carry sooo many incurable diseases every day are you going to sit there and tell a person ok I have had chicken pox in my younger days which may turn into shingles which you may catch from me, Or if someone suffered with cold sores when they were younger do you see them going round with cling film in their lips everytime they kiss someone. Its bloody ridiculous and this is why there is such a stigma about it because of unhelpful scary information all over the internet. Do you see dating with shingles..no! I know to not have sex on an outbreak as easy as I know not to rub an area when I have shingles on to someone else..simple as that. You are not hiding a secret there is just no need to be bringing this up. If your from the us then its different ways for you but in the uk everyone is a risk that you sleep with as they don't test for it simple as that. So it is more of a risk to sleep with someone who doesn't know they have it then to sleep with someone who does and knows the signs to look out for.
  3. I am totally confused and in need of advice. I was diagnosed in March with a swab that came back positive for hsv2 taken from a sore on the side of my vagina. I had another really painful outbreak on the inside which made going to the toilet excruciating. I was panicking from then at any slight itch or nerve feeling and it has taken over my life and mental health since being diagnosed. I had sex with a guy who had symptoms flu type and achey but he promised me he felt better and then once I told him I think he has given me herpes before I had the results come back he then admitted he had a swollen lymph node and still didn't feel well and was given anti biotics from the doctor who didn't know why he had a swollen lump under his arm and he didn't live in the same town as me and he got off very lightly as haven't seen or spoken to him again. I was put on suppressive therapy in August and have been told that I need to make an appointment in jan to discuss coming off suppressive therapy. I am absolutely in panic at the thought of coming off it. I am a single parent juggling a little boy and working,home to look after and a dog so as you can imagine my life is very busy so to have to deal with an odd painful outbreak every now and again which will get in the way of my life, hurt when I walk and having to go back to wearing no underwear due to rubbing just makes me feel fed up. The whole point of this is,do you think I should stay on suppressive therapy for life and has anyone else been on it long term or if you haven't has it improved if you have a busy lifestyle like me? Does it get in the way of everyday sex and a relationship? I am single at the moment have been rejected last time and am going back into the dating scene terrified because of having something there is no cure for. I am hurting,its interfearing with my work and everyday life as its at the back of my mind. I want to date so badly but this makes it even more harder and frightening.
  4. Anonymous88

    Itching without visible Outbreak ?

    @Simplethingsinlife I am on suppressive therapy so maybe an option for you for peace of mind but by the sounds of it if it is a breakout trying to come out and your body keeps knocking it back then thats a good sign that your body is fighting it. I was prescribed lidocaine that I keep stored in the fridge for when I need it,this may help you. You just apply a small amount on the itchy area and it stops the itching and really helps so maybe have a look into that as an option?
  5. Anonymous88

    Masturbation as a trigger

    @herpnerve as you are still in your first year like I am your body is still trying to settle and is very common to have more outbreaks in the first year. Did you use lub at all? Maybe that may help with reducing friction? I am female and on suppressive therapy of acyclivor twice a day and I masturbate regular due to high sex drive and touch wood it really has helped. Not saying this is something for everyone but if you find you are getting more outbreaks and it is getting in the way of your day to day life then maybe considering it with your doctor may be an option.
  6. I agree with @newtothis22 herpes is not linked at all with acne and this is definitely not herpes. Try drink plenty of water and get some good sleep.
  7. Anonymous88

    Itching without visible Outbreak ?

    If you shave down there it could be an ingrown hair or as the hair is growing back possibly? As I had this before I had herpes now and again due to shaving.
  8. Anonymous88

    Rejected, my first time

    At the end of the day I know my status and someone else may not know or may not even want to tell theres so I find someone else a risk rather than myself as I am managing it. No one has ever disclosed their std status. You catch colds,flu etc from people,yes it goes away after a while with meds but then so does this
  9. Anonymous88

    Rejected, my first time

    I'm from the UK and they don't test people for herpes even when you ask for a full std check up. Professionals told me I don't have to tell anyone and especially as I am on suppressive therapy and we use condoms then there is no harm as I know I am doing everything I possibly can to protect someone, as I know obviously not to have sex with an outbreak and I can disclose if down the line if we decide to have unprotected sex. I am going to be on suppressive therapy for a long as I can as it works for me and doesn't then get in the way if my life. I have never had anyone tell me they have suffered with cold sores before I have gone to kiss them and if someone did have a cold sore outbreak then obviously they won't want to kiss someone. I think the more big of a deal I make it then the more big of a deal it is. If people keep saying it is just a skin condition then I am going to just accept it as that..acne is a skin condition etc If there is loads of people out there that doesn't know they have it then anyone that then has sex protective or not has a chance of getting this. It's life!
  10. I was given herpes by a careless guy and I do really feel for you. I am raising a son alone (although not special needs) and dating was hard then let alone with this on top so I can totally relate. I was rejected for disclosing that I am a carrier of herpes I am now on lifetime meds to try reduce the outbreak. It has really worked but today I felt l I have a sore right next to my vagina but it is just sore only if I go to the toilet and start to wipe that area other than that I have not had any other symptoms other than this sore so I am not sure if it is a breakout but I haven't had sex so it definitely isn't that thats caused it. I realised I could cry everyday about now having herpes but whatever I do its now with me for life and will not go away so I just have to deal with and unfortunetely for us all too. I am in the first year of having herpes.
  11. @J.L2018 keep us updated on how it went please. Hope he was able to change his view on it and if not you will hopefully in time meet the right person.
  12. Anonymous88

    Contact with a sore

    No problem at all. It is hard to say but it is a lower risk for a woman to pass on to a guy as they have thicker skin. Usually the symptoms are flu like symptoms,swollen lymph nodes and headaches so just watch out for these. He may have been lucky but it is soo hard to say as everyones body acts differently to the virus. Is he aware you have herpes? If so I know you would hate to pass this on but if you have disclosed and have done everything you can not to pass it please dont blame yourself too much for it as its a risk to take. I know it is easier said then done but please try not to worry yourself.
  13. Anonymous88

    Contact with a sore

    May sound silly but are you sure it is a herpes sote and maybe not tearing from sex slightly? If you are on daily meds then it should be stopping the outbreaks.
  14. Anonymous88

    Contact with a sore

    Hi,are you taking acyclivor everyday for suppressive therapy or just when you feel an outbreak is coming?
  15. Anonymous88

    Anyone had a blood test in the UK?

    @newtothis22 Maybe keep an eye on it to see if they come up again and when they do get them swabbed. I agree with what you are saying I feel personally that men (not judging all men) don't seem to take their health very seriously a bit like that guy that passed it to me..he knew he wasn't feeling his usual self and yet lied saying he felt better to then continue not to be. I think because I am on acyclivor twice a day suppresive therapy that has helped loads by not having outbreaks so even though there is no cure I am so glad that atleast these meds seem to work so I can try my best to get on with life as normal. I dated a guy for 2 months who was my age and told him on the 2nd date and he was the first person since being diagnosed that I disclosed to.I was petrified and apologised but he made me feel so much better by saying that I was just unlucky and accepted it. But unfortunetely due to his work commitments he couldn't put enough time in to make it work. I was devastated as he was the first guy I felt I could see myself with in the future as we just clicked straight away and I haven't felt like that for 5 and a half years of being single since my 9 year relationship with my son's dad ended. In the 5 and a half years I haven't had a great experience with dating which has now left me less trustful towards guys plus where I live its hard to meet someone I find attractive aswell as someone that can make me laugh and share similar interests. I tried getting back into the dating scene some time after and met a guy who waa 7 years older than me which I found even more scary to disclose too,it didn't help that he was quite pushy to have sex with me on the 2nd date that I felt I had to then disclose and be put on the spot when it just wasn't the right timing for me. He said it was a bit of a problem but then carried on kissing which led to us having sex. Wasn't till days after when he did some research to find there was no cure that he then said it was a deal breaker and the only thing that puts him off me and said I should just date guys that have an incurable std by going on a dating site especially for people with lifelong stds. Even after educating him about it he made me feel like I was worthless all of a sudden and that I had a death sentence over my head or something. It really really hurt..even though I didn't believe he was the right one for me as he was older I didn't find the conversations very interesting it was just the fact that I was rejected for the first time ever over something I have no control over plus having sex with me before researching about it then having a problem with it. He then said goodbye and blocked me. It has since then pushed me further back from the dating scene. My friends are all in relationships so don't have much time for me as I am the only single one. Now having this has made everything with dating so much harder that I don't think I can risk getting hurt again. I would love to meet the right guy for a relationship but can't see it happening and to talk about this has bought me to tears as its made me feel more alone than ever.
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