Anonymous88

If you shave down there it could be an ingrown hair or as the hair is growing back possibly? As I had this before I had herpes now and again due to shaving.

At the end of the day I know my status and someone else may not know or may not even want to tell theres so I find someone else a risk rather than myself as I am managing it. No one has ever disclosed their std status. You catch colds,flu etc from people,yes it goes away after a while with meds but then so does this 🤷‍♀️

I'm from the UK and they don't test people for herpes even when you ask for a full std check up. Professionals told me I don't have to tell anyone and especially as I am on suppressive therapy and we use condoms then there is no harm as I know I am doing everything I possibly can to protect someone, as I know obviously not to have sex with an outbreak and I can disclose if down the line if we decide to have unprotected sex. I am going to be on suppressive therapy for a long as I can as it works for me and doesn't then get in the way if my life. I have never had anyone tell me they have suffered with cold sores before I have gone to kiss them and if someone did have a cold sore outbreak then obviously they won't want to kiss someone. I think the more big of a deal I make it then the more big of a deal it is. If people keep saying it is just a skin condition then I am going to just accept it as that..acne is a skin condition etc If there is loads of people out there that doesn't know they have it then anyone that then has sex protective or not has a chance of getting this. It's life!

I was given herpes by a careless guy and I do really feel for you. I am raising a son alone (although not special needs) and dating was hard then let alone with this on top so I can totally relate. I was rejected for disclosing that I am a carrier of herpes I am now on lifetime meds to try reduce the outbreak. It has really worked but today I felt l I have a sore right next to my vagina but it is just sore only if I go to the toilet and start to wipe that area other than that I have not had any other symptoms other than this sore so I am not sure if it is a breakout but I haven't had sex so it definitely isn't that thats caused it. I realised I could cry everyday about now having herpes but whatever I do its now with me for life and will not go away so I just have to deal with and unfortunetely for us all too. I am in the first year of having herpes.

@J.L2018 keep us updated on how it went please. Hope he was able to change his view on it and if not you will hopefully in time meet the right person.

No problem at all. It is hard to say but it is a lower risk for a woman to pass on to a guy as they have thicker skin. Usually the symptoms are flu like symptoms,swollen lymph nodes and headaches so just watch out for these. He may have been lucky but it is soo hard to say as everyones body acts differently to the virus. Is he aware you have herpes? If so I know you would hate to pass this on but if you have disclosed and have done everything you can not to pass it please dont blame yourself too much for it as its a risk to take. I know it is easier said then done but please try not to worry yourself.

May sound silly but are you sure it is a herpes sote and maybe not tearing from sex slightly? If you are on daily meds then it should be stopping the outbreaks.

Hi,are you taking acyclivor everyday for suppressive therapy or just when you feel an outbreak is coming?

@newtothis22 Maybe keep an eye on it to see if they come up again and when they do get them swabbed. I agree with what you are saying I feel personally that men (not judging all men) don't seem to take their health very seriously a bit like that guy that passed it to me..he knew he wasn't feeling his usual self and yet lied saying he felt better to then continue not to be. I think because I am on acyclivor twice a day suppresive therapy that has helped loads by not having outbreaks so even though there is no cure I am so glad that atleast these meds seem to work so I can try my best to get on with life as normal. I dated a guy for 2 months who was my age and told him on the 2nd date and he was the first person since being diagnosed that I disclosed to.I was petrified and apologised but he made me feel so much better by saying that I was just unlucky and accepted it. But unfortunetely due to his work commitments he couldn't put enough time in to make it work. I was devastated as he was the first guy I felt I could see myself with in the future as we just clicked straight away and I haven't felt like that for 5 and a half years of being single since my 9 year relationship with my son's dad ended. In the 5 and a half years I haven't had a great experience with dating which has now left me less trustful towards guys plus where I live its hard to meet someone I find attractive aswell as someone that can make me laugh and share similar interests. I tried getting back into the dating scene some time after and met a guy who waa 7 years older than me which I found even more scary to disclose too,it didn't help that he was quite pushy to have sex with me on the 2nd date that I felt I had to then disclose and be put on the spot when it just wasn't the right timing for me. He said it was a bit of a problem but then carried on kissing which led to us having sex. Wasn't till days after when he did some research to find there was no cure that he then said it was a deal breaker and the only thing that puts him off me and said I should just date guys that have an incurable std by going on a dating site especially for people with lifelong stds. Even after educating him about it he made me feel like I was worthless all of a sudden and that I had a death sentence over my head or something. It really really hurt..even though I didn't believe he was the right one for me as he was older I didn't find the conversations very interesting it was just the fact that I was rejected for the first time ever over something I have no control over plus having sex with me before researching about it then having a problem with it. He then said goodbye and blocked me. It has since then pushed me further back from the dating scene. My friends are all in relationships so don't have much time for me as I am the only single one. Now having this has made everything with dating so much harder that I don't think I can risk getting hurt again. I would love to meet the right guy for a relationship but can't see it happening and to talk about this has bought me to tears as its made me feel more alone than ever.

No it dies very quickly once leaving the skin

@newtothis22 if you still have those red spots then probably for peace of mind I would go to a sexual health clinic and see what they say about it as it doesn't quite sound like herpes to me but they may be able to take a swab of them to keep you an accurate result if it ia genital herpes. It all began in February of this guy I was due to see on the weekend told me during the week that he didn't feel well and was achey and felt like he had the flu, as the weekend approached I asked him whether we should cancel if he didn't feel well but he promised me he felt better. We had sex which wasn't pleasent,quite painful and swelled up, he wasn't very caring towards me when I told him after I how swollen and uncomfortable I felt so that sent alarm bells for me that he didn't seem the relationship type from his careless reaction. Days after I still didn't feel like I was getting any better and the doctor thought it may be herpes but the lump was diagnosed as a bartholin cyst,I was in extreme pain. When they first thought it was herpes I contacted the guy to say that they think it may be herpes and he told me he still didn't feel well and went doctors for anti biotics as he had a swollen lymph node under his arm and the doctor didn't know why. After they swabbed the lump it came back negative for herpes and confirmed it was a bartholin cyst but then straight after that healed in March I noticed a blister on the side of my vagina that looked more like the herpes blisters and was swabbed positive. I rang the guy to confirm and he wasn't very nice and claimed he didn't have anything wrong with him down below and that was that not to be heard from again. When I read on the signs that guys have of when they have genital herpes symptoms it seemed to sum up exactly what he had been going through. With the way he reacted and treated me it just seemed like he was aware something was up but had no care for me. Since then I had a painful outbreak on the inside in April and then went on suppressive therapy in August. I have had no further outbreaks. I do however have follicilitus an inflamation of the hair follicles that haven't been painful but extremely itchy that I have been prescribed anti biotics for and they are red spots (nothing to do with herpes) and not from sexual contact. Red spots or white spots around your lips may just be black heads or the normal spot breakout. Herpes is a blister so I am sure it isn't oral herpes you have by the sounds of it. I know it makes you paranoid with any itch,lump etc as I was like it but then you realise the difference eventually if it is a herpes breakout. It is easier for me to now know the difference due to having an outbreak compared to anything else.

I am on acyclivor suppressive therapy and I have a doctors appointment end of Jan as my batch of prescriptions will be ending. On this appointment I will be adament that I want to keep taking them for life as for me I feel it is best. I will be referred to a specalist at the hospital and hopefully I can remain on them. I have done my research and there are no bad effects and personally for me I haven't experienced any plus I have read columns from people who have been on it as long as 10 years plus. If I don't want to get pregnant I take the pill every day knowing there is a chance of a blood clot and the same thing to me as not having an outbreak I am gonna take 2 tablets each day knowing there may be a risk down the line but for both I am willing to take it.

That's such a tough one that I feel only you can make. If you didn't tell him and kept it a secret it would be hard to keep it from him plus when he does down the line find out he wouldn't react to it great after what he said about someone having herpes. Honesty in this case is probably the best way to go about it knowing that it may unfortunetely end things between you which is a shame but its part of life all of this and you can't help having it and the only way he is not got a chance of getting it is for him to not have sex at all so good luck to him. I have been open since being diagnosed early on this year, my mum knows,my sister, close friends,cousin, and a male colleague and it has been easier being able to talk about it to people I trust. It has happened to me,nothing I can do about it, its part of life and I enjoy sex which is how it managed to be passed on. You can't be made to feel bad for being human like everybody else. Best of luck x

I don't think it's bad. I am from the UK and I have been told by medical professionals that you don't need to disclose if I didn't want to, at the end of day I am on daily suppressive therapy so its a very tiny chance I could pass this. They don't test for herpes unless you have a sore to swab so a lot of people out there don't know they have it so having sex with anyone is a chance. With not using a condom I would personally be wary as I don't want to risk picking up anything else so unless I am in a long term relationship then I will always make sure that we use a condom. I was rejected last time I had sex. I told the guy before we had sex thinking I was doing the right responsible thing and it didn't seem a problem till days after when he said it is the only thing that has put him off me is that I have an incurable std...funny that to tell me after we have sex. From that experience and how the UK clinics don't test for it has made me in two minds whether to bother disclosing. I mean no one has ever came out with before kissing me that they have suffered from cold sores. I just feel opening up to someone about this kills the moment and makes me feel grose rather than feeling sexy.

Have you changed make up remover or primer etc?

@newtothis22 Hi I am from the UK. I also suffered from molluscum quite a few years ago and they were stubborn to go but luckily they eventually went and haven't had them since. I personally wouldn't bother paying for a blood test as the blood test may not give you an accurate results. I would say unless you had a sore present with symptoms then I wouldn't worry yourself. Herpes and molluscum are very different from each other and molluscum isn't painful and are just clear bumps with a dimple in the middle where as herpes is a very small blister or a small area of tiny blisters together that open up,weap and crust over and at times hard to see unless you look under a bright light.

Hi I am 30 female from the UK

It is possible but very small chance as hsv2 usually tends to stay from the waist down.

I think it varies for everyone as you can get signs from two days after exposure. I think you should relax honestly,if you have suffered from cold sores you would know more of what it feels like for a sore to come up so I am presuming only being hsv2 positive myself that it must feel the same down below. My main outbreak and one recurrance I had was extremely painful for me but then again if you do have anti bodies built in your system it may be easier for you. Please don't worry and panic over it I am sure you are fine 🙂

@Amando I am so glad to hear you have met someone lovely 🙂 Hopefully when I am not looking I will meet someone amazing and worth sharing my life with. At the moment I am just focusing on dating myself and continuing to raise an amazing son. Thanks for responding to my post, I can always count on you for support and advice on this site! We are all able to understand and lift eachother up when needed. This site has been amazing and I don't know what I would do without it. As far as certain medical professionals they are not so..

Well the phone call was a complete waste of time, the lady at the clinic did not want to listen to what I had to say,talked over me and kept trying to just get me to look at the herpes.organization website and tell me things I already know abot genital herpes. For those of you who don't live in the UK, UK sexual health clinics do not test for herpes unless you come in with symptoms to then take a swab of a sore to get the result. When you attend a clinic each person get's given a form to fill out ,you have a tick box option to have a full std screening, so by looking at this you imagine that when you get your results two weeks later and say they all come back negative you would presume that you are not carrying any std of any kind and you feel a big sense of relief. Well NOT THE CASE! As you could well be a carrier of the herpes virus and not know or get a symptom and ignore it till it goes away so you then never get tested for it. All I asked was if there could be in small print on the form or a poster advising patients that this will not cover testing for herpes unless you have a sore to test. People are so unaware and its easy for her to just say it is just a cold sore but it is more than that,its frowned upon,people reject you and are scared,theres no cure, it creates havoc in your life, the sores are painful and can effect work etc, plus having to take meds and disclose to every sexual partner in hope that you can be accepted because you now can't go into a relationship as easy as you could before diagnosis so no its not just a cold sore..I am sick of hearing it! She told me they won't put it on the form and they won't create a poster and I just need to educate myself on it by going on a website and was quite abrupt and rude. I was rejected by someone who said they don't want to catch something there is no cure for and even after trying to educate them on it he was having none of it and saying that he had a full screen test of everything and he was clean so wanted to keep it that way - which was my whole purpose of trying to get clinics to inform people that he doesn't cover all stds. So the stigma is going to continue..this really is bullshit!

As soon as those red spots appeared you are then best to get them swabbed for an accurate result as blood test isn't guarenteed that it will give you an accurate result which is why they don't test for herpes in the uk without a sore present. I agree mine never looked as terrifying as the images on google as they tend to always show the extreme version. Mine was neat tiny dots together on a very small area buy my god the pain from it was extreme and again I could only see them under a very bright light. The only outbreak I had after that was on the inside this time and they were just two very tiny white ulcers on my inner labia which was extremely painful to wee and then ever since then I have been on suppressive therapy and I will be staying on them for life.

It's not nice getting this at any age but I would be happy to switch getting ot at 50 than 30. I have been on my own for 5 and a half years raising my little boy and since getting hsv2 this year I am sure I will be alone for a lot longer.

I also have small itchy bumps that are on my top inner thighs and in the middle of the crease but when I went to the clinic she wasn't worried as she said it didn't look like genital herpes and could be just from friction of clothing,shaving.. I was paranoid over them as I made it worse by pouring salt all over me in the bath down there and believe I really made my skin really irratable. She tested for thrush which came back negative and I was 100% sure it wasn't. I stopped the salt baths and she gave me Olaitum cream to wash down there with and also apply afterwards and although not completely gone it has died down a lot more and looks much better than it did. I googled that follicitus I think its called can cause a burning itchy feeling or a ingrown hair.

The guy who passed it to me had flu type symptoms and felt achey with headaches during the week before we had sex, he told me he felt better but then after he went to the doctors when I told him the symptoms that I was getting as he still didn't feel 100% and said he had a swollen lymph node in his armpit and the doctor didn't know why and he was given anto biotics. He never admitted that he had genital herpes but it all made sense with the symptoms that he was having and will never hear from him again.