DoesntDefineMe

@mr_hopp I have similar questions to the ones asked above. Would you be able to provide some information for these questions? 😊 i would also like to add to the questions on what if your partner is HSV2- ? What activities with a partner should be avoided?

I haven’t used them but I heard the female condoms are best because they cover more area than a condom for men. My doctor was the one who suggested this.

I just need to vent a little bit. I am struggling here. I have been doing well for awhile now with accepting the fact the I have ghsv2. However, lately I have been feeling pretty low. I have been through soo much this past year it is a miracle that I haven’t gone completely mad. Long story short- a guy I was dating gave me this “gift” and then left me for another girl right after I found out he gave this to me. He is still just living his life with his new gf just acting as if what he did to me never happened. Meanwhile- while I was going through my first OB- my parent tried to commit suicide. Yeah...talk about trying to keep it together. And to top it all off I am going through a custody battle with my ex and had to gain emergency custody of my daughter due to his problems. So not only am I trying to be the best single mom I can be, I also have to cope with this condition as well. I will never understand how someone could do what my ex did to me. How he can go through life and convince himself that he is a good person? It’s honestly so unfair. I am trying to move on with my life, I really am. But at the end of the day I don’t know what I did to deserve this or what I did to deserve to be treated like this.

Hello! So I have the handout for the disclosure talk but I wanted some input on taking this discussion further. I know that if someone had brought this up to me, I would have questions regarding having sex. So here are some questions I want to be prepared to answer: 1. Can you transmit to a partner if they are touching your genital area with their hands while you are shedding? Precautions to take to reduce risk? 2. Can an HSV2- person perform oral sex on an HSV2+ person? What precautions could we take to reduce risk. 3. Has anyone ever used a female condom, and if so what’s your opinion on them? Comfortable? Awkward? Would like both male a female perspectives if possible! I know we are able to live normal lives with the intimacy that we deserve but are there any serious precautions that one may not know of that I need to take before having sex with an HSV2- partner? I just want to make sure I am doing my absolute best to keep them safe. I also want to enjoy it without worrying and being paranoid. thanks!

Can you update us on what ended up happening with your boyfriend?

Hello! I was diagnosed with GHSV2 in January and have not dated anyone since. I was recently set up with someone online and we have been talking every day. We will be meeting in October and I am already super nervous about disclosing. I have never had to do it before and I am soo nervous. So far, this man seems amazing. But I can tell I’m trying to hold myself back a little because I’m nervous to put myself out there for rejection. One important information can you recommend that I have ready to give him once I disclose? I do not take antivirals, yet, but will once we get closer to being intimate. I also have had only one outbreak since being diagnosed.

It’s crazy because I can go for weeks feeling good about myself, and then one day it just hits me and I start getting in my head about it. I have been working on redirecting my thoughts when I find myself thinking back about how I got it and what I went through. All I can hope is that this will only make me stronger in the end. And what signs to look out for when dealing with a narcissist.

I can 100% relate to what you’re going through. I went through the exact same thing and was diagnosed in January. I have also had a hard time accepting the fact that I have this due to someone who just selfishly did not disclose that they had this. I will tell you that I reached out to my ex boyfriends best friend (who happens to be a girl) and she basically told me I was “shit talking.” I let her know I was only reaching out because I didn’t want anyone to go through what I went through and couldn’t live with myself if something were to happen to the girl he was now seeing, and I said nothing at all. It did not make me feel any better knowing that she had already known he had it and that they felt like it was acceptable to not relay this information. My suggestion would be to focus on yourself and maybe go see a therapist if you can. That’s what I have been doing and have been solely working on myself instead of putting anymore thought into the person that gave this to me.

I have to be honest, I am really struggling on accepting the fact that I will have HSV2 for the rest of my life. I am on a constant emotional roller coaster and I don’t feel like anyone understands. My anger towards the man that gave this to me is only getting worse. I trusted him. I forgave him. And then I find myself alone and watching as this guy goes through multiple girls that, like me, trust him and have no idea of what he is capable of. I feel foolish for falling for this narcissist. I feel defeated. And I feel unworthy. I have a daughter that I stay strong for but she is the ONLY reason I am able to keep a smile on my face and keep pushing through. I left an alcoholic husband to better my life and my daughters life. I dated ONE guy afterwards who made me feel like I hit the jackpot. He was charming, attentive, motivating, supportive and seemed to want all the things I wanted in life. He gave me HSV2 and then left me to handle it on my own. Yet he’s just going around enjoying life and pretending he doesn’t have it. I can’t wrap my head around how someone could do this to another person.

Hello! I am a 30 year old female in South Florida and I am looking for a male or female as a support buddy. I was diagnosed in January with HSV2 and have been struggling to accept that I have this. Would be nice to converse with someone who can relate to how I am feeling and support each other through this. ✨You don’t have to be perfect to be amazing✨

I am so thankful for this forum, as I have felt very alone and anxious after recently being diagnosed with ghsv2. Here’s a little backstory on my recent diagnoses, along with some questions. I am recently divorced and had been with my ex husband for almost 7 years. I had no symptoms or any reason to believe I had HSV of any sort. After we separated I started seeing someone new. Of course he seemed like a dream come true because he was so attentive, sweet, supportive and motivating. We originally started our sexual relationship using condoms. After being together for some time, I felt comfortable and trusted him for us to not use a condom. 3 days after unprotected sex, I started experiencing what felt like a UTI/yeast infection. But then red spots started showing up and the pain became so unbearable that I could barely walk. I got the flu like symptoms with body aches, and pelvic pain. I went to my primary doctor and she did a swoon test in which cake back positive for hsv 2. I relayed this to my boyfriend at the time and he really didn’t have a reaction at all and just said we would handle this together. He never went a got tested, which lead me to believe he had known he had it already. Shortly after, he basically turned me away and stopped talking to me and started seeing someone else. A girl that looks like an innocent girl that is about to be put through the same traumatic situation that I have been put in. I have thought about reaching out to her a warning her but figured I would just be looked at like the crazy ex, and honestly I NEED to start focusing on myself more. Anyways, here are my questions. 1. Are the swob tests pretty accurate when there are visible sores? Or should I request getting the western blot test just to be sure? I never received the index scores that I have seen others post on this forum from different test only received a phone call saying I was positive for HSV2 2. Is it possible for me to have had HSV the entire time I was with my ex husband and not have any symptoms at all? And then have them so severe one day? I am am having a really hard time accepting that I have this. I was never one to sleep around with random people. As if being a single mom and dating wasn’t hard enough, I now have to add this to the mix.