Scared4this

Maybe this whole lesson of all this is self love.... If we can love ourselves wholeheartedly with all the flaws, we won't give 2 shits what anyone says. I know I wanted to be love so desperately and maybe that is why I am in this position I am in. If I loved myself a bit more I wouldn't have taken the chances I did. But all water under the bridge at this point. Anyways, positive thinking no matter what is my motto today. I rather have hope than not at this point.... And at the end of the day, it all comes down to love.... Love yourself, accept yourself and allowing others to love you! Chin up as u have people here who cares and will hold ur hands!

Good question.... As for me, once WB comes back, I will at least know where I stand. If I were u, seriously I would just think positive that my hsv1 is oral bc u have no other evidence to proof otherwise. And if u want to disclose to ur new partner and just tell him, u were tested and hsv1 but never had any outbreak. Use condoms and move on :). From reading on medhelp from the doctors and Terri, hsv1 in genial it's very rarely sheds so I really don't think u have much to worry about. I hope u don't have hsv1 gential but I am not a doctor but if all the doctors are telling u and the ID doc is willing to proof to you... Your chances are pretty awesome of NOT having it. I just have rather have positive thinking until I am fully sure. Then will deal as it comes. Look at it this way, we are DAMN lucky to not go thru the painful outbreak others had even if you have it in ur gential. So go have lots of sex and be very safe! The lesson I learned from all this is, get ur partner to test stds with u and you never know, he might be hsv1 positive already! If so, what's there to worry at all! Like they say... Life goes on and we have to somehow move pass this pos or neg! Life is all about uncertainties .... U do the best u can and that's all u can do :). God bless and here to support each other :).

Hey girl, in the same boat and just made an appt with neuro bc my damn left leg burning has now turned more into numb feeling. All these very strange symptoms but no outbreak whatsoever... Checked in and out by doctors. My ID doc who is also my primary doc told me the same.... She infect hates the herpesselect test bc she is a firm believer that without lesions or sores... U May or may not have herpes. She told me in her many years of practice (NYC) she seem the blood test pos and neg ... So she never rely on diagnosing anyone without swab to prove. I think the infectious doc don't really view herpes as a real disease perse. But she such a sweet person and I been with her for at least 10 years. U want to talk about rare... I was diagnosed with a autoimmune related condition when I was 27 ... Only 1 in a million get it but the good news it just goes away on its own. I am one of those rare but lucky individuals since at that time my lymph nodes on my neck was swollen so big (size of quarter) and I felt like I had flu for like 3 months. So with biopsy (thank God) it wasn't cancer! Anyways, I really think white daisies, u should stop convincing yourself that u have hsv1 in the gential area. You have more evidence of NOT having it than u do. I know all these freaking burning, pain, or whatever in the leg and vagina feels otherwise but you have to believe in the doctor or the evidences ( none of your swab have ever been positive). I mean, I take that as really good signs:). I just want to give u a diff perspective that's all.... And trust me, I am no less paranoid as you ( running to doctors every chance I get bc I think I am having an outbreak). I have to keep asking them... Ru sure u don't see anything? They look at me like..." Do you want me to see something" type of look. Anyways, I am sitting at my desk with my leg burning/ numb ... And think to myself, this whole thing is just crazy. But we are doing the responsible thing to seek the cause but I think we should be open minded to not always think it's herpes thou. Anyways, I am going to get acupuncture on Friday as I read it can provide some relief. We'll figure this out one way or the other:). god bless, S

No outbreak in the cervix .. In case my sentence was confusing.

Omg... Reading both white daisies and chrymar's posts.... I am in the same boat! The only diff is I got a positive hsv2 result which I just got a WB to confirm since it was still considered low positive. I have no lesion or sores on outside and outbreak on the inside (cervix) ... Been checked out by 7 doctors with 10 visits in the 5 weeks all the nightmare started. Only my left leg burns/numbs/ tingles and especially noticeable at night when I am in bed... The burning is also in the vagina area but only on left side. My left butt cheek is sensitive and in a bit pain at times... Lower back tail bone feels sore and burning!!! I thought these are prodome but never accompany with actual outbreak. I feel this almost everyday for. 5 weeks in addition to now a BV and yeast infection! So this is also interesting that I am 39 so close to both of your age ( not sure if this is the mid life crisis calling?) . So I am actually going to make an appt with the neuro this week as the burning/ tingling/numb left leg is pretty annoying at night that I have to keep changing position to relief the sensitivity. Maybe this is rash less shingles? If I go back to my infectious disease doc (she is also my primary) she may think its in my head as she already suggested I go to a therapist. I visited her 3 times in less than 1.5 weeks bc I thought I was having a outbreak and she also know my other many visits to other doctors. I know this is not in my head and also my groin area burns too.... But the only thing I don't think its linked to herpes is the fact of 5 weeks! I mean normal outbreaks at least get a few weeks off right?! Anyways... I am sorry about ur pains but glad to know I am not the only one! Once I get an appt with neuro, I will let u guys know what the doc says .... Hope to find some sort of relief soon for this issue! God bless, S

Thanks dancer and white daisies! I just treated my 2nd dose today on the antibiotic cream... I know it will take at least 48 hours to work so I need to be patient :). But maybe it's psychological but I think I feel 5-10% better today than the last 5 weeks... Maybe next week I won't have to visit a doc at all ( been to at least 1 or 2 doc a week since this started). I hope to feel normal down there again and not be so afraid to even touch it. It's getting to a point if I adjust my panty from the waist, I would run and wash my hands. I was a girl who runs Round in her undies at home before but now sweat pants bc I am so afraid that I might be having an out break and it would get on my legs or something. So with that said..l I haven't had sex since 7/3 and stopped all activity until I know where I stand. I don't want to hurt anyone and certainly need sometime to deal with myself and what's happening down there! I hope that the mess will kick in soon and the steroid cream didn't do anything bad to me:) actually made the inflamed area a bit better but I am only applying once a day instead of 3 times. Thank u guys so much for reading! It's been mentally exhausting and physically draining this 5 weeks. Right now it's all out of my control and need to trust God! I am so humble by this whole experience and so grateful for forum like this! If I can ever repay this kindness please let me know bc these are the moments I will remember that u were so kind to a stranger like me:). God bless u :).

Also, dancer, thank u so much for ur wisdom and support:).

Hi Dancer, just want to give u an update ... So went to my new obgyn since the situation has bitten even more uncomfortable and diflucan wasn't working. So glad that I went.... She checked everything and no lesions or sores in my cervix! She took a culture of my discharge and for Pap smear and also to test for herpes ( but she said it would only be positive if I have an active outbreak which I don't but I still insisted). She diagnosed me with BV and also gave me another yeast cream as she thinks I think the rare yeast (4%) that doesn't respond to the pill. Also she gave me Nystatin triamcinolone ointment - for the skin on the outside Terconazole- for the yeast So I pray that The Lord is working thru her so I can get some relief! Also, I went it get my WB done at quest in NJ today. I hope they know exactly what to do as the lady looked somewhat confused at the request. My culture on my discharge and Pap smear should be back in a week or two. I hope to hear some good news as I continue to hope and pray! Can someone tell me that the ointment is steroid ... Would that make me worse as at this point I don't know if I have hsv2 or not? No outbreak after 10 trip to the doctor in 5 weeks? Any advice... Please? God bless, S

Hi Andromeda , how u feel is normal and if u read the posts and stories.... Everyone pulls thru but one day at a time pace. I am new to this so certainly can relate. Herpes has nothing to do with sleeping around ( as dancer often said, it's a. Equal opportunity condition) . Can I ask how u were diagnosed ? How do you know the guy u were seeing gave it to you ? Are you hsv 1 or hsv2 or both? I am not sure how to get back to normal myself but I have faith whatever the outcome might be will be. Sometimes life throw us a curve ball then it's up to us to learn to catch it. I keep telling myself that there are so many other things that could be worst ( right now it feels like the end of world) such as cancer, losing your limbs , having life threatening diseases like MS , etc. I once read that when a group of people come together with their issues, all of them walked away keeping their own issue bc grass is not greener on the otherside! You came to the right place for support and this is the first step for being positive. I made some really serious mistakes ( hance why i am where I am) but as long as I learned from them and not make them again would be a good lesson in life. Life sometimes is a gamble.... Keep stopping by and read the wonderful resources that the site has to offer. You can reduce the transmission rate down to 2% with condom and meds. I am sure dancer will have much better encouragement words for u than me but just to let u know.... U r not alone and def NOT a leper of any sort. I will pray for u and God bless, S

I hope so... But they said we will check for stds and others... I am an idiot so I didn't ask. When I pee it doesn't hurt... I got at least 3 pelvic exams ( one from my obgyn, one from ER, one from the obgyn I went to see on 8/14). All they say is, all looks normal. Thank The Lord I have insurance otherwise I would be broke with the recent amount of visits to the doctors! For Monday, I will be smart and ask to test for BV . Btw, do you know if they can see the cervix thru an visual exam or does it have to be cultured thru the discharge? This paranoia since the blood test has been so emotional to a point of breakdown than an outbreak. Who would of known 2 months ago I would be in this situation!? Praying for all and thx for hearing my frustration! I am humbled by this whole experience.

I had thought it's really rare to have hsv1 in both places :( I hope u find out something more definite soon. I also read that hsv1 gential has much less outbreak and the shedding of the virus is much much less than hsv2. I am getting my WB on Monday to pray that my hsv2 is negative but I am sure my hsv1 is positive but how does one know where hsv1 is .... Can be oral and can be gential.....I wish there are rules to this herpes game that we are forced to play! Thx for sharing and u r an inspiration :).

Hi Adrial, I read on medhelp that any score under 3.5 should be either tested again Ina few months or go for WB. Technically anything above 1.1 is positive but there seems to be a debate on the cross reaction of hsv1 and hsv2 ... So if an individual want to confirm with his/her status, would be to go for WB ( that's if u have no outbreak). No blood test is perfect in anyway but for peace of mind on something like health... I would go for WB MC0704 ... But the recommended time frame is 12 to 16 weeks after potential exposure or sex. You can read more on this topic in medhelp and get ur self educated thru Adrial's fantastic herpes material! But to confirm if u do have hsv2 is the first step.

Thanks dancer:). I really appreciate ur humor and support. You are God sent:). This will be the 3rd obgyn I am going to. The first one ( my very own) tested for everything on 7/18 and everything normal. She said I have yeast and gave me diflucan. Then I went to another obgyn bc my own wasn't available on 8/14 she took some culture and told me it didn't look like yeast so i am waiting for the result ... I don't know what she test for thou. So now learning that herpes lesion can grow in the cervix is so disturbing! How the heck ru suppose to know if u can't see outbreak ! I will update once I see the obgyn on Monday.... I been on one week of yeast pill but the discharge is still the same ... So highly doubt this is an yeast infection. God bless,s

White daisies , were u diagnosed with hsv2 by blood? If all swabs were negative... How do u know u have hsv2? I am just curious and new to this whole hsv2 yes hsv2 no limbo. Thanks inadvance for sharing :)

Hi all, I am getting my WB on Monday but I been noticing some white discharges (excessive). My infectious disease doc think its yeast infection but I have no itch ... Just discomfort for 5 weeks now along with burning leg and Lowe back. So I been reading that herpes lesion can happen in the cervix since I have no lesions and sores on the exterior (checked by 6 doctors during the 5 weeks of visiting them total of 9 times). Does anyone here ever had herpes in their cervix and does it cause white excessive discharge? I am going to another obgyn on Monday and asking for a silver smear (?) how does one know if the lesion is in the cervix and does it last for 5 weeks? Thank u so much for ur help... I am so stressed and just been not able to function at my job or life in general. I have stop checking for lesions and sores for few days as it's not mentally healthy to a point of panic attack. I know everyone said this is a none life threatening and should just suck it up but how i am reacting to this.... It feels like the end of what I ever known. What bothers me the most is the constant discomfort down there and leg burn/ back pain.... It's like even if I want to take a break... I can't bc it's there to remind me all the time :(.

Btw... I am sorry about the guy u were dating... I am in a similar situation and cut off after I was tested positive. My score is higher than ur 2.43 . I can't really give u the emotional support yet as I don't even know how to deal with mine .... But only time will tell.

You can get info on medhelp forum as well. It's been very resourceful to me. You test result falls under low positive so you might want to retest at a later time or do a western blot confirmation test. The fact u never had any outbreak is definitely worth while to do so. There might be a chance u were recently infected as well. Have ur partner tested? If he is negative... There is a good chance ur test is false positive. The false positive tends to happen more often with HSV1 in high #. So I would encourage you to red thru medhelp and search for hsv2 low positive. There are many posters who got biokit or WB and it was negative. This is recommended to be done 12-16 weeks after possible exposure. Hope thus helps. I am greeting my WB on Friday. God bless, S

Thanks... Mine is just burning but not painful.... I went to the obgyn today and no outbreak of any sort but I am still feeling burning and my tailbone is sensitive. I am going for the western blot next Friday .... I really need confirmation if I do have hsv2. This whole thing is driving me crazy for none stop for 4 weeks...... I told my obgyn about my burning leg and she referred me to a nerve doctor for follow up. Praying that u will feel relief... Have taken mess helped?

Ru hsv2? I been having burning thigh too.. Just my left. It's been going on for 4 weeks. I take diflucan for yeast infection, then it will go away but always return along with burning vagina. I haven't had any ob yet but going to obgyn tomorrow to check. But I never had bumps or anything on my thigh... I thought this maybe h damaging the nerves? Everyone said it's not h related but I read that this may be what people get b4 outbreak? But to gave it for 4 weeks and more.... Is really strange.... Anyone can shed some light would be helpful:)

Majority of us got here bc our once partner weren't honest or just don't know.... The fact she gather enough courage to tell u, that in itself is a sign of a person with character and integrity. Any sexual relationship is a risk no matter what so that's just life. If u really do feel something special for this girl and have the connection that is truly amazing then don't let something amazing pass u by. I understand ur reaction as it is normal and both of my best friends had turned down people who has h. I have no judgement there as I know if even the chance I would not want to be in the limbo either. However, I know I loved a few people in my life and if the one I loved told me they have h... I like to believe I would love them regardless. We love not bc they are flawless, but we love is bc they are worth to be loved. She is a great gal and respect u enough to let u know so u know u can trust her as she trusted u with her most deepest secret. If u turn her down, please be kind and compassionate. It is so tough to be out there dating as is... And with h, it's hard to have self love at times.

I read that it's rare to spread once u r infected in one area .. It usually stick to one area. Unless u were infected at the same time where ur antibody haven't had time to fight it off ( this is from medhelp forum under herpes). U should have the blister swab and test to give ur self a peace of mind. I am curious what hand foot mouth disease is? Hope all will calm down soon for u. god bless, S

Can I ask how were u diagnose if there is no outbreak of lesion or sores? Was ur partner tested? Sorry I am new to all this so I am just learning. I am sorry to hear the frustration and just to let u know... U r so strong and I admire u so much! God bless, S

Thank u both dancer and hope89. It's great to have someone tell u what u may be expecting. I had a cold when I went to get tested which was July 15 and got my result on 7/18. Even when I had the cold, the doctor visually checked everywhere and saw no signs on 7/15. I then went to my obgyn on 7/ 18 before I called in for my blood test results and she saw nothing but took a pap swab to tame me. Did u have leg burning feeling and groin pain? I did and it comes and goes but with no lesion or sore. I really don't know what to make of any of these. Obviously I tested positive already so I am just at a loss to just accept it. I am getting the WB test done on 8/22 so I can just be sure. I feel like a coward to not able to face it ask this literally turned my life upside down but I also know this should define me as a person but I just want to know for sure. Maybe it's reading all these low positive turning into WB negative gives me some hope. I am sorry I want to sound hopeful... I will stop back after my results...I know the good people here will support me thru as I have no idea how to do this. I am praying for everyone and thank you so much for sharing as it means a lot to know I am not alone. God bless, s

Hi everyone, I just want to say ... It's been the toughest month ever since I received the blood test result. I know I have been naive and irresponsible in my actions in the past and I can't blame anyone but me for putting myself in such position. I am literally depressed and almost going insane. I been to the doctor's 7 times and looked at by 5 different doctors ( internist, my own obgyn, infectious disease specialist who is also my primary, ER gyn attending, and ER doctor) who saw no ob and just yeast infection. But I have symptoms like burning left leg that lasted 2 weeks and left groin pain for a week but no lesions or sores ... Believe me I checked and I went to the doc every time I thought I saw something. My hsv2 result falls into a low positive of 2.43 and hsv1 was over 5 . So I read almost everything on medhelp and seems like I need a western blot test to confirm. But I am only 10 weeks to my possible exposure so needless to say Ihave to wait until 16 weeks. My infectious disease doc told me the Elisa test is unreliable and should never be taken without any breakout. She seen the test go from pos and neg again and again. I just don't know how to properly digest this whole thing. I have discoid lupus and when I am under stress I have rashes popping up everywhere... Go away in 10 mins or so. I know this has nothing to do with herpes but just to let u know how much this has affected me. I can't focus on anything and just praying a lot. I know I can't go on like this so I am wondering if anyone else is going thru this limbo? I stop seeing the guy I was dating in fear I would give herpes to him or he might of giving to me. Thank you so much for reading and God bless you for being such a big support to those in need. I never knew how complicated all this can be! I am feeling like I am waiting for the other shoe to drop for the outbreak and sincerely overwhelm with guilt of my stupid stupid decisions.