Dave

I emailed Adrial last week and never received a reply.

A while back there was a conference call here with a female doctor about an antiviral study she was part of. I've been trying to find the link to it and can't seem to locate it. I want to show it to my doctor because he won't put me on antivirals because I've never had symptoms. He's never read anything suggesting that antivirals reduce the risk of transfer from asymptomatic shedding and I need to educate him.

Again, this unfounded fear of genital Herpes is just insane! Yet no one ever requires someone they kiss for the first time to get a Herpes test "to be safe". Herpes is not a big deal for the majority of people folks, that's why 80-90% of those with it don't know they have it. We should be more afraid of the flu, because it actually kills people every year! But I bet none of you quarantine your family members, when they have to flu. So why worry use condoms for Herpes with your partner? If it's for other reasons then I get it, but Herpes is nothing to fear.

HSV2 is really no big deal for most people and yet we carry the biggest burden of shame and responsibility to disclose. I've never once had someone tell me before we kissed that they have HSV1 when they aren't breaking out with a cold sore. And apparently people can now take legal action if they can prove they got Herpes from you. Can you believe that? Sue you for catching a NON-life threatening STD. Will people then be allowed to sue you if they give you the flu? Of course not, and the flu kills people every year! We need to stop this madness! Herpes is nothing more than a skin condition that's a minor inconvenience for a small minority. I find it insane that we have to disclose our condition when it's not life threatening and the majority of people have little or no symptoms. There's a reason why it's often not part of an STD screening panel, because it's not a big deal to the medical community and it shouldn't be!

Looking back, I wish I never got tested, which is weird for me to say because I've always believed knowledge is power. This virus has such a stigma in our culture, you'd think the medical community would change that. But to them HSV is nothing more than a fly on the back of an elephant.

One of the things we need to do is stop treating HSV as if it's a big deal, when in reality it isn't. There are so many other non life threatening diseases have more devastating effects on the body and our emotional well being. Alopecia and Psoriasis come to mind. Granted they can't be spread via skin to skin contact, like HSV can. But I've seen how heartbreaking those two diseases can be on people and honestly, I'd rather have HSV.

It's still interesting that if you have genital herpes and are not having an outbreak there's a 96% chance of not giving it to a partner and 99% if you're on antivirals and wearing a condom, that you should even be obligated to tell them. It's such an unwarranted stigma.

Herpes is nothing more than a skin condition that for the majority of people, get little or no symptoms. It's sad that if you have genital herpes you're supposed to disclose it to future partners. Yet does anyone ask before kissing if that person has been tested for Herpes? Of course not. And 80% of the population has HSV-1. The stigma is ridiculous, especially considering people die every year from the flu virus and no one dies from the herpes virus. We can blame the TV and movie industry for making something that really is a non issue, into a shameful burden.

Try putting things into perspective. The flu virus kills roughly 36,000 people a year in the U.S., the herpes virus kills no one.

I find it odd that if a person has HSV-2 (with no outbreaks), they are expected to disclose this information to future partners. Yet I've never heard of anyone disclose that they have HSV-1 (with no outbreaks), before kissing someone. Could it be that most people don't realize something like 99% of cold sores is herpes? Yet genital herpes comes with shame, depression and the sense that no one will ever love you again. And no one knows you have it unless you tell them, while everyone can see a cold sore and some people will know it's herpes. Why should HSV-2 positive people care about disclosure if they are not having an outbreak, yes I know about asymptomatic shedding, when even the medical community views HSV as nothing more than a skin condition and many physicians don't add HSV to their STD screenings. To put things in perspective, the Flu virus kills people every year while HSV does not, yet HSV…specifically HSV-2 causes so much unwarranted emotional suffering.

I was with a woman for 20 years, until I discovered she was having an affair. She already had HSV-1. She was tested before I discovered the affair. I ended our relationship, and was tested discovering I have HSV-2. I was in shock and depressed. We had 20 years of unprotected intercourse and oral sex. I never cheated and never had an outbreak. My doctor ordered another blood test for me, in the hopes that the first one was a false positive, but I was still positive for HSV-2. I contacted my Ex and she was tested again, still only positive for HSV-1. How is it possible that I never contracted HSV-1 from her and she never contracted HSV-2 from me? For all I know, I've had this longer than 20 years.