- here we go -
Waited to have sex until I met the man I was truly in love with, after 4 months of marriage and a lot of stress I found out I had Herpes, he claimed he didn't know (which was a lie). Looking back I think the fear of starting over and having herpes was the excuse I made to myself to stay for 6 long years in such a bad relationship.
Great news! I am free now - going on 7 years :) and my life just keeps getting better.
Having to deal with Herpes has not been fun - however outbreaks have not presented in the past 7 years as they did in the beginning, now that I finally got the courage to start again and found someone I was really really interested in, got my first slap of rejection, I get it... it happen for a reason, but being rejected because of H sucks! I also understand they reject the H and not me, but this adds a variable to all this finding a soul mate and it almost feels like it reduces the fund and spontaneity in a relationship.
I was told today I live in the shame of it - and yes I do... not sure if I will ever get over it.
In all of this what I am looking for is to become a stronger person / woman / human being, in all that it would be great if I can find someone that loves ME, sadly in my marriage (looking back) I was not loved as a woman should be loved... and it was probably because loving myself was a foreign concept.
Having said all that - again I am very happy, like everybody else I am a good person :) and want to learn how to disclose this but mostly how to deal with the rejection... and MOVE ON... :)