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elysium17

Herpes doesn't get better... does it...?

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*disclaimer*  I apologize if my attitude is the most pessimistic thing ever, but this is how I'm really feeling and I'm writing this post looking for emotional support or some sort of light at the end of the tunnel, because I'm running out of hope.

I was recently diagnosed with HSV2 two months ago (Or HSV1 in the genitals; who cares, it's still ever longing and painful) and there never really is an end to this is it...? I know you carry this virus for life and the only thing you ever have to look forward to is that "it will be less recurrent and painful over time." However, is that really true for everyone? Everyone's body is different. True, I have read on this forum that people usually have less outbreaks after the first few months/years. I have also read about people having HSV1or2 and having non stop outbreaks for months/years on end, or they have another recurrent outbreak attach after a decade of having contracted the virus. Which makes me wonder, is the whole antiviral developing after 4 months thing even true? Does your body ever truly keep the virus under control?

 

For the past two months, I have been getting non stop outbreaks or prodome symptoms ever since i was contracted with the virus. I've been taking suppressive therapy with valacyclovir 500mg twice a day and i just recently upped my dose to 2000mg a day because another flare up came through. I recently started taking 3000mg of L-Lysine and 500mg B-Complex because i began to clearly see the demise of my sex life. I have a partner who knows of my situation and i am extremely grateful for her understand (she is god sent for sure), but i can sometimes feel and see in her face that she is scared of taking the risk of contracting the virus. I often have the feeling of breaking up so she doesn't have to deal with my emotional and physical problems.

 

Do you ever start to feel better? like, are you always going to be feeling these prodome symptoms or random itching even when you're not having an outbreak? If that's the case, then we need to protest these drug companies, doctors and everyone who have been lying to us at these clinics, forums, drug prescription reviews (i saw a product review for l-lysine recently and i swear those are the drug companies writing those positive reviews, sorry to burst the bubble) that this virus is calm/livable and really demand for a cure. They are making LIVE WITH THIS S***. A lot of them are sweeping this virus under the rug and it's destroying all of our lives. I don't know if i will ever look, feel and love the same.

 

I am sorry for this angry post, but this is just how i feel. I am not in the business of making people's day's worse, but i don't know who else to talk to... Please guys... is there an end to all of this suffering? because i don't know if i want to continue with this anymore....

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@elysium17 I really can understand the anger and the frustration. I was in the same place when I was first diagnosed. It’s true that it’s a bit tricky in the sense that different bodies have a different experience of it. Some people do have recurrent outbreaks often whereas others may have 1 or 2 a year (or even less). I’ve even heard of people who don’t have outbreaks for years and years and then all of a sudden years later they’ll have one. I know the uncertainty is not helpful, because we want to know what’s going on with our bodies! I think for the most part it is true that it gets better with time. The first year your body is adapting, and as the years go by it typically gets better and better. For myself, I have HSV2G, and for the first three months I had one every month like clockwork. I was stressed though, it was life changing for me and I was coming to terms with it. I have a very supportive partner though who doesn’t care about it at all. In the beginning I doubted him but I’m at the point now where I see that he really isn’t bothered and I believe him. I went quite a few times to the sex clinic just to talk to them and get some support. I have quite a few sex positive friends who were knowledgeable about this and coached me through the bad days. I’ve been taking good care of myself and honestly I rarely think about it or stress over it now, and I haven’t see an outbreak now in 3 months. It’s a short amount of time but before this I was having 1 a month. I do think it gets better because what you’re going through now is no indication of how it will be for you in 1 month, 3 months or a year from now. Take advantage of the support around you, take it day by day, I guarantee you’ll get passed these difficult times and it will get better, even if it doesn’t feel like that now. 

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@elysium17 I should add that I don’t do suppressive therapy and I never have. I just take meds to treat outbreaks. All I do is eat a good diet, go to the gym regularly and have a more positive outlook on my life now (compared to the early months of diagnosis). My mindset is completely different now, to me it’s just not a big deal. 

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On 8/17/2019 at 6:53 PM, elysium17 said:

*disclaimer*  I apologize if my attitude is the most pessimistic thing ever, but this is how I'm really feeling and I'm writing this post looking for emotional support or some sort of light at the end of the tunnel, because I'm running out of hope.

I was recently diagnosed with HSV2 two months ago (Or HSV1 in the genitals; who cares, it's still ever longing and painful) and there never really is an end to this is it...? I know you carry this virus for life and the only thing you ever have to look forward to is that "it will be less recurrent and painful over time." However, is that really true for everyone? Everyone's body is different. True, I have read on this forum that people usually have less outbreaks after the first few months/years. I have also read about people having HSV1or2 and having non stop outbreaks for months/years on end, or they have another recurrent outbreak attach after a decade of having contracted the virus. Which makes me wonder, is the whole antiviral developing after 4 months thing even true? Does your body ever truly keep the virus under control?

 

For the past two months, I have been getting non stop outbreaks or prodome symptoms ever since i was contracted with the virus. I've been taking suppressive therapy with valacyclovir 500mg twice a day and i just recently upped my dose to 2000mg a day because another flare up came through. I recently started taking 3000mg of L-Lysine and 500mg B-Complex because i began to clearly see the demise of my sex life. I have a partner who knows of my situation and i am extremely grateful for her understand (she is god sent for sure), but i can sometimes feel and see in her face that she is scared of taking the risk of contracting the virus. I often have the feeling of breaking up so she doesn't have to deal with my emotional and physical problems.

 

Do you ever start to feel better? like, are you always going to be feeling these prodome symptoms or random itching even when you're not having an outbreak? If that's the case, then we need to protest these drug companies, doctors and everyone who have been lying to us at these clinics, forums, drug prescription reviews (i saw a product review for l-lysine recently and i swear those are the drug companies writing those positive reviews, sorry to burst the bubble) that this virus is calm/livable and really demand for a cure. They are making LIVE WITH THIS S***. A lot of them are sweeping this virus under the rug and it's destroying all of our lives. I don't know if i will ever look, feel and love the same.

 

I am sorry for this angry post, but this is just how i feel. I am not in the business of making people's day's worse, but i don't know who else to talk to... Please guys... is there an end to all of this suffering? because i don't know if i want to continue with this anymore....

Your post is so relatable and I feel your fucking pain! I’ve had genital hsv for about 10 years. I couldn’t tell you if its hsv 1 or hsv 2 because both my gyno and primary care doctor have said “it doesn’t matter which one because it’s the same thing.” But is it really the same thing? Like I would like to know what strain I have but they won’t do it. I honestly think these doctors don’t give a shit about helping people “like us” because the virus isn’t deadly. There hasn’t been any new drug developments against this since Valtrex came out in the 90s and it sucks. The physical and mental suffering from this virus in unimaginable. I wish I could honestly say it gets better. I was on acyclovir for 8 years, had ZERO outbreaks, no prodrome symptoms, then one day I had a HORRIBLE outbreak. Worse than I have ever had in my life. After that they kept coming every 2-3 weeks and seemed to be WORSE when taking the antivirals. I was also taking 3-4000mg of lysine daily, vitamins etc., all the bullshit the websites tell you to do and nothing helped. Finally went to my dr and asked for valtrex, which they only give the generic because these asshole insurance companies won’t cover name brand. It’s been about 7 months and things have gotten better but I feel like I am constantly about to get an outbreak. The stress of feeling this way prob makes it worse but when you are in constant discomfort how are you supposed to forget you have this thing and relax? Everything I read says over time your outbreaks will become leas because your body gets immune. What a crock of shit. I think everyone needs to band together and start an uproar. We need better treatment/medication/a vaccine against this/a cure. I’ve gone 10 years and idk how much longer I can take either. 

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