Hiya All! This is my journey

[ashaelizbeth]

Hiya! I'm new here but I've been lurking on and off for quite a bit. I've decided to pull myself out of the shame I've been living in for the past 3 years. I was given H 1 & 2 by my ex-husband. He cheated and I ended up with the reminders. I have to amazing girls that I am now raising alone while he serves a jail sentence for heroin (I know like the story wasn't awesome enough ;) )

I was in a short lived relationship until I disclosed.. then he couldn't deal. Its ok though he could barely handle discussing our feelings I had a feeling this relationship would be a bit too real for him...

So now I'm taking the time to heal since I've been avoiding this for FAR too long. I did sign up for the awesome to be home study course starting next month.. New year New Attitude for not the new me but a better, happier, & healthier me.

 

Thanks for reading and I look forward to being a member of this awesome community now that I'm leaving the shadows of the forum and my shame behind!!

 

 

[abc123]

Your story is inspiring. I am new here and spend most of my time reading. Thank you for sharing. One day I hope to be where you are now. I guess only time will tell. Thanks again, abc123

[ashaelizbeth]

wow thanks abc I don't feel inspiring most days.. Its just getting up and doing what I have to do :) I have read so much my eyes feel like they are crossing since I've decided to face this "elephant" of mine (that is my code word in public when discussing with my friends in the know).

I think (at least for me) I was fed up with being at war with myself. I was tired of feeling like crap, tainted, dirty. I wanted to feel like me again whole, happy, and healthy. So I decided to take the elephant by the trunk and educate myself and take it head on.

I hope what I just rambled about helps you in some small way... we all have our own journey with ourselves and I've pulled A LOT of inspiration off this board and the cancer board I belong too (yep I've had that too.. I know my story just keeps getting better ;) lol).

The human spirit is amazing and can overcome so much with just some love and inspiration from other humans who can open up and just care. <3

 

[WCSDancer2010]

ashaelizbeth:

 

Welcome! Glad to meet you and thank you for sharing your story. And so glad to hear you have signed up for the Home Study course. Great attitude to have ... yes... the new Year is the perfect time to start anew :)

 

I can't wait to hear everyone's stories as they do the course!

 

(((HUGS)))

 

 

[ashaelizbeth]

WCS thank you for the warm fuzzy welcome!! :)

You are def one of the most inspiring people here! The TED talks you've posted are AMAZING!

I'm excited for the course and my future!!

[WCSDancer2010]

I was fed up with being at war with myself. I was tired of feeling like crap, tainted, dirty. I wanted to feel like me again whole, happy, and healthy. So I decided to take the elephant by the trunk and educate myself and take it head on.

 

Love it. Nothing like addressing the elephant in the room! And glad you like the Ted talks - I turn to them when I need lifting up and inspiration. Yup. I have my fragile days too...LOL B-)

 

[ashaelizbeth]

I have my fragile days too.. More often than I care to.. But I'm trying to consciously change them into good days.... Perception is everything.. My perception of the situation will color my whole day... I refuse to be at the mercy of my nasty inner voice anymore!!!( so says I on a good day) :D :D :D

[WCSDancer2010]

so says I on a good day

 

I hear ya! I have a lot more good days than bad nowadays ... the bad ones are mostly in a post-break up type situation when I'm just throwing a great big pity party for myself (I've learned to go with that one for a few days rather than fight it!). And I have to say now that I came out completely it has even less power over me ... it's an interesting thing to notice. I'll probably be blogging on it all soon :)