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Posted

So, I need help making sense of all the information out there. My fiancee, she has genital herpes she told me up front and we have been great friends for a billion years, before we started dating. We have been together about 6-8 months

I do not have it, but we have been having protected sex. but we are planning on having a child and we need to hurry we are both in our early 40's.

My question is about oral sex though. we have been using a dental damn, it's awkward but works. So the question is, can I contract HSV 2 in the mouth, I do not want to use the dental damn anymore. Sorry for the ramble

Posted

Hey TinCup,

 

No need for any apologies. Rambling is acceptable here. ;) And I totally get it, right off the bat, all the information out there floating around can be a bit overwhelming. That's why I created these handouts:

http://eepurl.com/b4IPP

 

And awesome for her telling you upfront. We're all about integrity in communication here.

 

Only 1-2% of oral herpes cases are caused by HSV-2. It's quite a small %. We've only had a few community members here actually get tests come back positive for oral HSV-2. So it's up to you.

 

Here are some links to help you further:

http://herpeslife.com/herpes-forum/discussion/1647/oral-sex-with-herpes-can-it-happen/p1

http://herpeslife.com/genital-hsv-1-herpes-and-oral-sex/

http://herpeslife.com/spreading-genital-herpes-hsv2-from-oral-sex

This content is for informational purposes only. This information does not constitute medical advice or diagnosis. I'm not a medical professional, so please take this as friendly peer support. 

Helpful resources:

Posted

LOL I just read your reply and my chances are greater dying every time I ride my motorcycle.. Goodbye dental dam

Posted

@TinCup

 

Is your fiancee on any of the Antivirals? Because that will help a lot when it comes time for you to start that family....

 

The "good" news is that as a guy, you are less likely to get it from her, and with the meds, you are getting closer to your chance of dying on that bike than from getting it from her with regular sex. The vast majority of new Genital H cases are from people who didn't know they had it or were misinformed about asymptomatic shedding risks. So you guys are well ahead of the game ... even with all the confusion ;)

 

Enjoy your lives together ... tomorrow isn't promised ... hope to hear back from you when you start that family!

 

(((HUGS)))

Posted

She is on them. Are you saying that even with unprotected sex as a male my chances are better than that of a female to not get it? not that is matters to me, I was just wo

Posted

Yes - M-F transmission rates for H2 are around 10% with no protection ... F-M transmission is about 5% ... that's because we women have a lot more delicate/thin skinned areas and more folds for the virus to gain entry ... :(

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