Safe sex?

[PrettyFly]

I'm so confused about this! I've maybe (who knows what will happen....) have met someone I kinda like and I'm still in the dark about how to go about 'safe' sex with HSv2. I think I've had it for about 4 years and did not know (Dr said it was eczema) and it comes up in the same spot of my back side every time. So how are condoms going to protect against that? Ive just read over the answers to my initial post a while back but I'm still confused. Haven't had an OB in months, and have read that transmission risk is lower the longer you've had it? I just have no idea how to deal with it. Can shedding happen anywhere on the body regardless of the site of the outbreaks? Without getting too graphic, unless Im in a certain position, he's not likely to come into contact with the site of the OB. Can it get in through other part of a partner body? Hands or through spooning?? God can it spread through spooning??!! I have no clue! Help!!

[Sil88]

Hi,

 

- 4 years is a long time to build up immunity.. I think you're right about transmission risk lowering over time.

- viral shedding is possible around the whole trunk area (roughly what is covered by boxers) but it more likely around your exact OB location. So yes, naked spooning has a very small risk.

- for that reason, condoms would cover his mucous membrane areas where a virus can enter more easily.. it's less likely to pass through normal skin without a tear or shaving cut etc.

- I wouldn't worry about the hands, but watch that he doesn't bite the skin around his nails!

 

[WCSDancer2010]

The virus *can* shed anywhere in the boxer shorts region BUT it will shed a LOT less in the thicker skin (ie, the non-genital areas). In order to spread, you need a big "dose" of the virus ... sorta like it takes 150 million sperm so that one can make it to the egg and fertilize it .. (out of that 150 million in an ejaculate, *very few( make it through the cervix, to the uterus, and up the fallopian tube.... if a man's ejacualte falls below 20million odds are very slim that enough sperm will get to the egg for a successful fertilization) ... you need a pretty decent "dose" of herpes to get in contact with you, and into the system. So casual touching, or regular skin to skin cuddling is unlikely to allow enough of a concentrated about to enter your partner unless they come in direct contact with an active lesion and even then, without rubbing (which causes micro-tears to the skin) odds are still pretty low of transmission. So spooning should be just fine :)

 

Certainly a condom won't help with the area where you have it as far as him coming in contact with it ... although if his penis happened to slip out and come in contact with the area, it might put your mind to rest that he was protected...and it would protect that area on him from any shedding.

 

The main thing is to not have sex with an OB ... because you are likely to be shedding during that time. And if you have sex in the position where he may come in contact, well, perhaps wearing boxers may be an idea ... get creative friend!

 

 

http://herpeslife.com/keeping-your-partner-herpes-free-can-be-super-sexy/

http://herpeslife.com/herpes-forum/discussion/5807/list-the-ways-to-protect-my-partner-from-getting-herpes-hsv2 Safe alternatives to sex

[hippyherpy]

So it's ok to snuggle without an outbreak, but with is not? What about with daily Valtrex?

[WCSDancer2010]

I would be cautious with an outbreak because that is basically shedding on steroids. If you are taking Valtrex and you have an outbreak, it is still an outbreak.... you are still shedding heavily in that area. So yes, *even with* Valtrex, you should abstain from anything that will have sustained contact/rubbing (especially in that immediate area) ... but again, there are soooo many ways to be intimate, just get creative folks!

[hippyherpy]

I mean snuggling without outbreaks.

[WCSDancer2010]

Ah - yes, with Valtrex and no OB's should be just fine :)

[PrettyFly]

Thank you all so much! Haven't actually heard from him now which sucks but hey, I guess I know for future reference :(