Breaking Off Contact with Giver

[NothingGoodGetsAway]

So, my giver was a close friend of one of my best friends. We had a mutual attraction and had made out once before the fateful night this year. We were there for each other this summer, as he went through his diagnosis and a move and as I went through my primary. We talked a lot for those first few weeks.

 

Since then, I've fallen in love, with a wonderful man. He's all the support I could ever need, and I don't think it's appropriate that I talk to my giver. We weren't close before, and though we shared a crisis experience and got closer, we haven't spoken since September (brief check in).

 

He just reached out as he's in town and wanted to see if I could meet up. I told him I couldn't, that I had plans this weekend. He asked if we could talk next week. I honestly can't, I'm fully booked.

 

But the truth is...I don't want to talk to him. I think it's unfair to my current partner, with all the support he gives, to kind of go behind his back to talk to someone I don't really want to talk to. My giver is a great, nice guy. But I just don't want to share anything more with him, and I don't want to be his support. (I'M A NICE PERSON THIS SOUNDS SO AWFUL).

 

Can anyone advise a nice, straightforward way to tell him this? Or is it okay to just tell him I'm busy, that I hope he's well, and that I'm doing good?

[2Legit2Quit]

I think exactly what you said about feeling it not fair to your new guy, is the best way to day that and there's nothing wrong w that.

[WCSDancer2010]

I agree - tell him you are in a new relationship and you don't think it's appropriate to be meeting up with him, that you wish him well, but you are moving on.

 

No need to make it more complicated than that :)