Help conscious is driving me mad

[Feelingblue]

Hey all. Looking for some help and advice.....

I feel like I'm lying my concious is driving me mad.

 

Told my partner that I have hsv2. He still wanted to date me. I also told him I don't get symptoms which was true at the time. However I think the stress of panicking in a new relationship triggered some outbreaks. This was before we were intimate and I didn't tell him about them. I'd told him I had it and we weren't being intimate and it was such a new Relationship I didn't want to share something so personal.

 

Anyway, I told him I might take suppressive meds and he seemed to think I was making too much a big deal. But it's the right thing for me. So I started the meds, but never told him, because he brushes the conversation off and I know it makes him a bit uncomfortable me bringing it up all the time.

 

So I also had a breakthrough ob during my period, so naturally we weren't being intimate anyway, so I didn't tell him, we weren't having sex and I was too embarrassed it's only been 3 months.

 

So opinions..... He knows I have it, I told him I might take meds. How much detail do I really need to go into, tell him when I have an ob, which is infrequent (of course I'd never have sex with him) and do I have to tell him I decided to take the meds? I don't want to keep bringing it up and putting stress on a new relationship. I hope one day I'll feel comfortable enough to tell him if I have an ob, but right now it's too new.

[2Legit2Quit]

You can just say you decided to take the meds and leave it at that, no more discussion needs to be had. Aa far as when you experience symptoms, state you think you may have symptoms and want to era on the side of caution and want to wait it out. Or you can just not say anything and make the night all about him, a game out if him not being able to touch you and then you finish him in other ways.

[WCSDancer2010]

Personally, I believe in transparency in a relationship...because otherwise things can get muddled and besides, if you tell him the truth, and something happens, you know you did YOUR part.

 

I would tell him that the stress seems to have caused an OB, so you have chosen to go on the meds for YOUR peace of mind. If he brushes you off, then just make it clear that it's important to YOU that you have an open and transparent relationship. Make sure he understands things like asymptomatic shedding, and that if you say you think something is going on, that you will need to find other ways to be frisky.

 

I call Herpes my Wingman. You can learn a lot about this guy by the way he deals with H. If he continues to put his head in the sand around it, odds are he will about other uncomfortable things. If you say it's important to YOU to be transparent, he should respect that and allow you to talk while he listens. Pay attention to his response/reactions.... they will tell you a whole lot about who he REALLY is :)