One Year Later.....

[HatingMeNow]

So, it's been a year since my ex broke up with me because of her diagnosis w/ H-2...... while I'm still single, suffering with complications, and feeling completely worthless from it all (specifically how she chose to break up with me by telling me she basically was with someone else the last month of our relationship), I was told through a former mutual friend she and her new boyfriend are extremely serious and maybe engaged in the upcoming months......

 

.............. I will save you all the sob story, because I really don't matter. I was misdiagnosed for nearly a decade with an abnormal skin condition, based on a bad reaction to certain soaps and latex. Three doctors misdiagnosed me, until my ex and I found out she had H-2, and the one other female I was ever with sexually prior to her slyly admitted she knew she had it but would never tell me.

 

I feel completely, utterly worthless in every sense of the words. I'm short (5'3), overweight, do not own anything but my car (which is in the process of slowly falling apart on me), I still live at home, in my early 30's, and outside of a decent job, have no real career...... however, the woman who gave me this is happily married w/ 3 children (who are all negative for H), and my ex who left me over this (which at this rate I don't blame her), has a solid career in the nursing field, a new man who obviously accepts her for the condition, and may have wedding bells.

 

You have no idea how much it hurts and empty I feel every morning waking up to realize there will never be a woman who will love me, or accept this. I don't know why I'm even writing this.... guess the timing as it was this time last year the final nail was driven, and I never got to heal. Never will heal.

 

How is this fair?

[JingleBelle]

I used to have the same kind of thoughts. Seeing the guy who gave it to me get multiple girlfriends, have kids, see his exes who also have it find plenty of guys to date...it's hard. I get it. But this is only a small part of your life right now. Regardless of this, we all go through times where we are single, can't seem to find anyone to date. It just happens that way sometimes. Herpes rarely has anything to do with it. You WILL heal. There WILL be a woman (or multiple women) who will love you and accept this. I've had many successful disclosures and relationships over the years. As have many people on this forum (and beyond!)...check out all those success stories!! Your 2 exes are perfect examples! They didn't let this slow them down.

If you want my personal opinion, I think you should focus on your life and feeling better about you first. It sounds cliche but it's true...you have to love yourself first before someone else can. If you're unhappy with yourself and your life, work on bettering you! Make some small changes at first and things will fall into place. I've run into many guys in my dating life that are in similar situations and I always feel that they should work on getting to a better place in life before trying to find a date. Things will start looking up..I promise!!

[hippyherpy]

First of all, some of the guys with most successful sex lives I know aren't tall, and a lot of men don't hit their stride until their thirties. Secondly, you can't get down on yourself because you have control over your weight. Get to a gym and change your eating habits. Give your self a chance to explore things to find what makes you feel

passionate about life. That might help you discover a career. Do what you can to move out of your parents house.

 

 

That stuff has nothing to do with herpes.

 

Keep in mind that it can take a while to implement those changes.

 

Also, herpes is not a sexual death sentence. I'm living proof of that. Go check out my ladies

man herpes success thread. Work on improving your lifestyle and your game. It's going to take a lot of effort probably, but you will realize that you can this seemingly low point as an opportunity to get your life together in a way that you probably can't even understand yet.

 

Trust me, do these things and you will flip the current script that you are living and not only increase you odds of success, but possibly find much greater success than you thought possible.