He's tested negative, and I tested negative but...

[K123]

So his blood test is back. Negative. I had the symptoms and the flu and the blood tests were negative right away. I know it can still be true that I have the virus, but wth?! Is there anything that might mimic hsv?

 

I never had pus filled bumps that crusted over. Just bumps that appeared where I had damaged tissue after dry sex on the lower vulva that hurt when I urinated...but definitely had the flu symptom with high fever and leg tingles and itchy feelings in my behind/tailbone area. I'm confused. How did I contract this? If he isn't the carrier, and I have the disease but am not showing up as infected (so it's a new case), what happened to give me this? I have only been with him for three years.

 

I thought I was doing okay mentally, now I'm all askew again.

 

Sigh

[Nadia]

Have you tested like 3 months post exposure?

[K123]

No, this is my first outbreak. I certainly am not concerned with me I understand that I can still test positive. But I have no idea where I would've gotten it if my partner doesn't have it. I trust him implicitly and I know I've not strayed.

[Nadia]

You never know

maybe that is not herpes

[K123]

Yeah, Im trying to not get my hopes up, since there is that outbreak of something and I had the flu symptoms and the crazy itching symptoms... A girl can hope, but it will stink if I get all hopeful and then show with the issue on a later test. Rats.

[StillMeButWiser]

It is quite possible this is a new exposure for both of you. If so, neither one would test positive via blood. I have heard stories one person unknowingly contracted the virus and passed it before showing symptoms. But don't jump to conclusions now.

[K123]

No jumping, just disappointed that we need to wait for more info. I'm a person who likes to make lists, so I was sure we would know what was coming next once tests returned for him. But him being negative threw me for a loop. I'm okay today. What will be, will be. But the waiting for info on what typing makes me anxious... I had hoped he had it and we could just move forward. Now we will have to take lots of precautions to try to be sure he doesn't end up with it, so that changes the future I had been imagining. As usual, my thoughts of what the future holds is not reality! After so many times you would think I'd know better! I'm not learning that lesson easily, so karma keeps showing me to quit "awfulizing" and allow things to unfold at their own time.

[Kbh]

How did this turn out for you?

I'm having my primary outbreak, tested negative on the IgG and haven't been with anyone other than my former (as of 5 hours ago) SO in the past 5 months. He said he tested negative. I have yet to see the results, though he said he would be willing to share.

[K123]

Awaiting results of a second blood test. I'll update when I get them. My doctor wasn't even going to do a second teat. I had to request he order it. Now he's saying it might not be, after all these symptoms...I'm just going to be patient and await the results. I am okay either way. I have the support of this fantastic community if I am positive, and I will be fine.

[hippyherpy]

Freaking out waiting for info about a largely inconsequential skin condition? Don't buy into the stigma. You are going to be fine either way.

[K123]

Hi Hippy,

I'm actually pretty okay now with however this turns out. That is completely due to this site. I'm a huge advocate for this forum now; I am friends with lots of nurses & have shared this site so they can in turn tell others. I've also shared with some close friends, so I don't feel alone be cause they have it too. It's been an eye opener for sure.

 

Things change all the time and this virus will change some things, but it isn't what I thought when I first heard the doctor say the words...because I've had this site to tell me the truth about what is the future. It's not something one aspires to, but I'm not concerned like I was at the beginning of this journey. All due to the info here!

 

Thanks everyone, for asking questions and answering them! I read every comment on this forum. You all have made me so much better informed. Even my doctor didn't know things like I do now. There is just so much crap online that it's refreshing to hear the factual info here. Please know that you helped my state of mind when I was swirling and felt out of control. Talking things out is most helpful to me and this site gives me that! Whatever the outcome, I am glad I know the truth about this virus. It's going to be fine whatever the outcome. You are right. I do need to relax! It's not like I can change anything at all, again, it's just the uncertainty. I'm awful at waiting!

[hippyherpy]

I'll have just drop this here:

 

To reiterate, my sex life has actually improved after finding out I had herpes. Very recently I had some fun adventures having a threesome and also had a fling with one of the most attractive girls I've ever been with.

 

Why?

 

I think the herpes diagnosis brought some focus and rigor to my game that might have been lacking.

 

At first, not knowing what would become of my sex life was a little unsettling. That in turn made me think that I had to do everything I was doing before, but better. I thought that I had to compensate for the herpes by enabling any attractive qualities I have to really come out more. I don't even know if this was necessary, because it seems like most girls have been cool with my disclosures.

 

I used the diagnosis as an opportunity to get my life together in a way that I might not have if I didn't get herpes. Now, I don't even think you need to do that kind of thing, but it can help. Also, for the people who don't have herpes, they can have their own moments of recognition to improve themselves.

 

In that way, the stigma actually helped me. Strange to say that, because now I see how flimsy and see-through the stigma really is. It lives off of people's imaginations, but when it comes down to the reality and a well done disclosure, it doesn't really have much power.

 

I'm not saying I don't get rejections over herpes, and I do get annoyed sometimes having to disclose, but I'd say there's 9/10 ratio of green-lighting with my disclosures. That's pretty good odds to the point where I can consider having herpes as being just another one of those simple insecurities that people fret about when it comes to relationships.

 

In other words, there is nothing special about herpes. It's just a part of life for many many people.

 

I don't think about it much at all nowadays. If some girl doesn't want to hang after I've disclosed, it's no problem. There are many others that will be ok with it. That's what my experience has been like. It makes sense, because the actual herpes really isn't a big deal. I've had what, like two breakouts over the past year and a half? Didn't even hurt. I take pills for it everyday, so that helps.

 

I've had more colds and sore throats that have put me out of commission than herpes outbreaks.

 

Most overhyped skin condition in the world.

 

Hell, I've had ringworm since I was a kid and sometimes get eczema and those are both more annoying and persistent than herpes has been by far.

 

You can either be celibate like a nun or priest, or just accept that if you've slept with more than three people in your life, at least one of them is likely to have had herpes. I'd totally do it all over again and get herpes to have had the fun life I have. Completely worth it. Herpes is such a non-issue.

 

If anything, getting herpes is like getting an honor badge of being someone that has enjoyed their life hahaha

 

Just kidding, sort of.

 

Maybe herpes is the new hip thing now anyway, like kale :D

 

Thanks Tinder!! Hahaha

[HikingGirl]

If anything, getting herpes is like getting an honor badge of being someone that has enjoyed their life hahaha

 

Just kidding, sort of.

 

 

LOL!! I think that's the best thing I've read in months!! Perfect! :-)

 

[K123]

Well, I've certainly enjoyed my life! Just had the second tests confirm I have both 1 & 2. Onward to treatment options and life. It's nice to know the results finally.

 

Something that I wonder about is my kiddo. We've always given each other kisses. Not open mouth of course, just typical mom kisses. I've never had cold sores, and this is a new infection for me. Should I worry about him? I don't know if I would have him tested, but once I get my head on right, we will certainly discuss it, in an appropriate fashion. He's 15, and he will be smarter than I was, because I'm going to educate him.

 

My partner was told he was negative, but got a call back to see his dr today...don't know if it's about his tests, or something else, but I have already shared results with him. He is supportive as of now. I assumed it was from him, as I've been monogamous for the past three years with him. I wouldn't be surprised to find out his tests were in incorrect.

 

What should I ask the doctor? What should I know about life with both kinds? (I'm doing okay as far as the rash right now, haven't had an oral outbreak that I know of before.). Anything to be aware of? Thanks for any words of wisdom.