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I'm at a loss just diagnosed, and in fear of losing my guy

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About a week and a half ago, I received an email from a random lady that said they she had divorced her wife and in the mix of that she found out her ex was having an affair with my soon to be ex husband, and they were diagnosed with a STD. No one would give me answers not even him. I am casually seeing someone new almost the 3 months, I feel safe with him, and he needed to know, so i sent him the screenshot of the email from the lady. I made an appt the next day to go get a full STD panel, everything came back negative except the HSV1 & HSV2 panel. Fast forward to about 2 days ago, I received the call from the Dr that the HSV2 came back positive and indicated genital herpes. I shot him a text, since he works all the damn time to let him know. I keep saying im sorry because I'd didn't know, I didn't have symptoms or anything, they cant tell how long ive had it, he tells me its not my fault. My new guy has been extremely distant.


I asked him if we could have dinner and talk about all of this, and he asked me what is there to talk about? I told him what's gonna happen between us. All he said is "im just hoping I didn't get it too"


Is there anyway i can help ease his mind?

Every sexual encounter has been unprotected and its stretched over the beginning of August until now.


I don't know why i am so afraid to lose this guy. Just need help ;(

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Perhaps, but ignorance is bliss even for people who know they have herpes. Assume he does have it. It's an astonishingly common thing that little is talked about unless it's about shame and fear.You know what people have herpes? Only those that say they do.its enough to say you don't have it with little to no signs and the misleading information about it. It's nobody's fault. That's one thing about it.


I say junk him. Don't hold on to someone who isn't making efforts to understand you or support you. It's easier sad than done and pherhaps he needs support rather then being abandoned


Hrm. Hope that link works


A lot of times logic just isn't enough for people. Specially when you disrupt their false since of security.



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I agree with the statements above. I know the feeling of wanting it to work or to have someone during this time in your life, but ive noticed many would rather just step away from it all and live in ignorance. It shows what will happen when the relationship hits a rough patch, theyre out. Im lucky enough to have someone who understood and supported me when i found out (luckily they didnt get it from me and was 100% on board with getting tested too). The sex is just as amazing, we just make sure to have lots of condoms around and i keep on a suppression therapy. I honestly dont feel bad at all for having it because of him, and i hope you too find someone as supportive and helpful.

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