Herpes talk/disclosure success story

[Katieanne]

Hey everyone,

 

So I have been dating this guy for over two months. We hang out a few times a week. Things have been getting more serious over the past month or so. Every time we hang out it is like we get closer and closer to one another, we open up a little more, trust each other a little more. It is so refreshing because it has been so long since I have felt such a close connection with anyone. So the past week or so I was starting to get really bummed after him and I would hang out because I really liked him and felt like I was in limbo with the relationship because this one thing would determine whether we would keep seeing each other or not. So for a week straight I stressed non stop over telling him. I practiced "the talk" with my family members and closest friends. I analyzed every possible reaction I could get from him. The week I decided to tell him, I broke our plans more than once because I couldn't muster up the courage to tell him. So fast forward to Friday night, our date night. We are at his house sitting at the dining room table having dinner and we are having such a good conversation, laughing and smiling, but i am feeling kind of sad because I know by the end of the night this relationship could be all over. I finally get the courage to tell him there is something we need to talk about.

 

He says okay what is it?

 

I say I have a viral skin condition that is transmitted through sex. I have herpes.

 

He say okay well thanks for telling me. I really respect your honesty.

 

I start to reel off statistics on how common herpes is and how 1/4 people have it but most are unaware.

 

He says he's aware of that and that this doesn't change anything about our relationship. That he doesn't look at me any differently and that he is just happy I told him.

 

So I continued to inform him that there is a risk that he could contract the virus and that I take daily suppressive medication to prevent viral shedding. I invite him to come to the doctors with me to ask any further questions. He says he is more than willing to go if I want him to. I said no unless he feels it necessary.

 

It's been about two weeks since I have told him. Things are good between us. We are still taking it slow for other reasons that have nothing to do with herpes. I just feel that it is important to really know someone before you become that intimate with them. However, I am so happy to have found such a good non judgmental guy and I am looking forward to our future together.

[nic4897]

I am so happy to have read about your success! I hope just like everyone here to have a positive disclosure experience and am happy you have shared yours! Good luck to you :) Keep us posted!!! Relationships are tricky right? Energies are one but are really a million parts of a whole and when two wholes are attracted.. Who knows what part they are attracted! Taking it slow allows you to see more than just that initial part of the energy you were attracted. It allows you to see more of the whole. I wish to you the very best of luck :) xxoooo

[WhoopsiDaysi]

That is so awesome Katieanne! I really feel that herpes is a gift in a way because look at the sense of trust you two have now developed. He knows you will be open and honest with him, even if it is something that may potentially work out badly for you. You care about him enough to just tell him. He has shown that he also is trustworthy and really values YOU as a person. You never would have had that opportunity to forge that deeper connection without herpes. So yay herpes! LOL I wish you both all the very best!!

 

Hugs,

Brenda xxoo