Chinup

LOL my friend did it and said it felt like getting a tattoo on her vagina.. She never finished the treatments! But I'd just double up on meds to be safe! I was actually considering getting implants and now I'm not sure if my body can handle it for the same reasons

Thank you all for the feedback! I really appreciate it!! Being newly diagnosed, I'm still not even ready to think about sex lol but if the disclosure comes sooner than I'm expecting (and he doesn't run away scared.. Cross your fingers), those might be questions he has.. Definitely good info. But fact is I'm not ready to disclose or have sex yet, I still need more time with it to see how my body handles everything. That's so crazy about the finger thing too!! I really didn't know it was that easy to spread it like that.. Damn. Anyways, thanks again and keep the advice, stories and experiences coming :-)

Hi all! So I'm newly diagnosed (aug 2014) and since my diagnoses, sex hasn't really crossed my mind.. But now that I'm sort of "talking" to someone, the thought has crossed my mind and it has raised many questions.. I will apologize in advance if these are stupid questions lol And please feel free to be as TMI with your answers and experiences as you can!!! 1. Foreplay.. Is it safe for him to even put his hands down there? Obviously I wouldn't do anything if I felt symptoms of any kind, and I'm on suppressive therapy, but is it safe for him to touch me with his hands and not go immediately wash them? Lol what about oral? Not even sure I'm comfortable with oral at this point.. I'm pretty much terrified of the thought of sex :-( 2. I've seen on here where some condoms have triggered an ob.. Is there a certain kind I should use? Any special type of lube? I guess my main theme here is, can and will i ever have/enjoy sex again??!! Can it be as normal as it used to be? Aside from condoms and meds, how "safe" do we need to be? What other precautions will we need to take? Please just feel free to share your advice and experiences! I might even be jumping the gun here because I haven't disclosed yet.. We have been friends for 6 years or so and have been hanging out off and on over the last few months.. I had friend-zoned him and over time have realized that I don't want him in that zone lol.. Of course I got diagnosed with this before I had made that realization :-( I'm not ready to have this talk with him yet, but I know if things keep going the way they seem to be going, the talk is coming. I'm sure these are questions he will also have because lets face it, sex and intimacy are huge parts of a relationship. We also both want more kids one day, so I'm sure he will have questions about that too.. Any and all advice would be much appreciated :-) thanks so much in advance! Have a great day!!

I'm taking 1g of lysine and the airborne daily multi vitamin with immune support. I honestly have NO idea if either makes a difference.. I was just diagnosed in August and have had 2 OBs.. Since that second one last month, I've decided to stay on suppressive therapy as well. I'm hoping to make it through this cold/flu season without getting sick and hopefully no more OBs lol!

Thank you, Adrial! Yea, I didn't see it listed either, but I think it's likely a combination of new meds and lots of stress lol! Thank you for responding :-)

So I was diagnosed back in August and have been on the Valtrex off and on since then.. I took it to clear up the initial OB, started a suppressive dose for a few weeks (500mg daily), then stopped for about 4 weeks until I had my second OB 2 weeks ago. Since then I've decided to stay with the suppressive dose for a while. I have noticed lately that my face has been breaking out like CRAZY!! I seriously feel like a 14 year old going through puberty lol! And I have never really had an issue with acne, so it's very strange. Since my diagnosis I've also started lysine (1g daily).. Ive checked the side effects and such and didn't see this as a possible side effect so I was just wondering if anyone else out there has noticed the same thing? Trying to figure out if it's the meds or just stress. And the self esteem just keeeeeeeeps dropping lol.. Ugh! Thanks for the feedback :-)

I wish there was a "like" button, @positivelybeautiful!!! I completely agree! I go from what I think is a certain form of "acceptance" to extremely low and depressed. Like you said, everyone's experience with this will certainly vary and i myself am on a mission to stay as positive as possible. However, what I can say is it's MUCH easier to be happy and positive about this when the symptoms aren't active. I was feeling pretty good about everything until that second OB shook me up.. Then I was back to feeling extremely low and depressed. Luckily it cleared up in less than a week with meds and I'm back to feeling "ok".. The mental and emotional symptoms are just as bad, if not worse sometimes, than the physical. I find I beat myself up constantly over this.. I have to make an effort to STOP thinking about it and just focus on something else. Short little story for you all.. I had a rough day on weds. My daughter told me her ears and mouth hurt (first time my 2.5 year old has ever voiced anything like that to me lol) so I made an appt at the ped and took her in.. Waited over an hour to be seen to find out that she was perfectly fine (thank goodness, of course).. Anyways, I was late to work for no reason, had a stressful day at work, had a terrible drive home that took way longer than it should have and as I'm sitting in my car, FRUSTRATED as hell, I thought to myself "I'm having a terrible day, and it has NOTHING to do with H!! I still have the same kinds of bad days that I always did..". It was eye opening for me.. Another story, my coworker just lost her babies (twins).. Second miscarriage in the last few months. I am completely devestated for her and her husband and it also put me in my place. In spite of this, I still have so many things to be thankful for.. The first one being my daughter. When I was first diagnosed i made a list of "thankfuls" that I was supposed to keep handy in moments of weakness so I could pull it out and read over it for a reminder.. I also refuse to let this thing ruin or stop me from living a full life, but some days are defintely easier than others!!! :-) sorry for the book lol!!!

Oh and if you get sweaty, shower as soon as you can :-)

This was one of my concerns too!! Especially since I was diagnosed at the end of summer and I live at the beach! So far I haven't had any issues with sun exposure. I have been much more diligent about using sunscreen and I monitor my time in the sun more than I did before. I think more so than the sun exposure, I think what might cause the OB is the body being stressed from sunburn.. Something like that.. And of course, dehydration and such. I would just start slow and see how your body reacts! If your body is used to being outdoors and exposed to the sun, it might not have an effect on you :-)

I am just like you.. I hate the thought of taking daily medicine.. For that reason I never did BC, vitamins, etc. However, after this diagnosis I had to come to terms with the reality that anti vitals will be a part of my life forever, especially of i get into a relationship with someone who is H-. After my initial OB I took them for about 3 weeks.. I weaned myself down to the typical 500mg of valtrex a day and then decided to give my immune system a try and stopped completely. I went 4 weeks OB free.. Last Friday I had my second OB.. Started back on the meds and it's pretty much gone. This time I'll likely stay on the suppressives for a bit because I really don't want to have an OB during the holidays and my bday :-/ my second OB was much more intense than my first. Every positive thought and feeling I had been holding on to for those OB free weeks disappeared in an instant. Now that I'm at the end of this second OB, I feel it all coming back. It's a roller coaster emotionally and you just have to figure out what works best for you! Keep the meds on hand and if you decide to treat it as they come, double up when you feel the symptoms and hopefully you will knock it out before it starts! Dancer has a lot of good advice about that stuff :-)

Yea I don't seem to get the flu symptoms either.. I don't think I had any symptoms for the first, I just noticed a sensitive area and there was already a bump.. In between the first and second OBs, which was actually about 8 weeks I think, I felt tingles, itchiness and weird shit constantly.. Not sure if it was real or imagined. I feel like my lady parts are hyper sensitive now.. But before this second OB I definitely had a stinging pain right in the spot the OB occurred and a shooting pain in my left buttock for about 2 days before the bumps appeared. Prob should have started the meds as soon as i felt that, but I didn't know it was any different from the other things I had been feeling.. Now I know and if I feel like that again I can start my treatment earlier than I did this time and hopefully knock it out sooner! Luckily the bumps are almost cleared up and gone! Just down to two little red spots now, thank goodness!!! Thank you all for your input and advice through this :-) I really appreciate it!!!

Okay :-) thank you!!! I'll order the alum from your link! Does it hurt when you put it on the area before theres a blister? Lol

My suppressive is 500mg of valtrex per day.. For episodic treatment, you just take it at the onset of your OB symptoms and hopefully knock it out before it turns into a full on OB or you at least get lucky and shorten the intensity and duration of the OB. When I was first diagnosed I was given a script of 1 gram twice a day so that's what I've been doing on my second OB.. Once it clears I'll go back down to my 500mg a day suppressive dosage. I also take 1g of lysine and a multi vitamin with immune support. Lots of people on here have their own little regimen they follow :-)

I have the same thoughts too lol! Mine are more along the lines of: "hmmm 1 in 4.. Who else here has H besides me?".. I was at target this morning and that's all I could think about.. I guess maybe it helps me feel less alone :-( I know of a few friends that have it, but I'm not close enough with them to disclose that I now have it too.. I wish I had someone close to me that I could confide in and share all of this with, although I would obviously never wish this on anyone else. But it does make me wonder if I do have closer friends that have it who haven't felt comfortable to disclose to me.. Im two months in and I still find it hard to think of anything else. I have to make a serious effort to keep myself busy and occupied, otherwise my thoughts will drive me crazy! The first few nights after my diagnosis I couldn't sleep at all... I eventually just crashed one night from sheer exhaustion. I still have sleepless nights here and there when I can't get it out of my head or the worries of living alone forever won't go away.. But when the OB is gone, it's a lot easier to focus on living a "normal" life.. The new "normal" I suppose. As for working out.. I stopped immediately after my diagnosis.. I waited for my first OB to clear up completely and i started with short, easy workouts and walking. Then eased my way back into my regular routine and I didn't have any issues. Just listen to your body! I make sure to shower asap after my workouts and if I'm not feeling "normal", I don't workout. I make sure to Drink lots and lots of water too!! I would advise to start slow after your OB clears and see how your body reacts. I have a half marathon in a few weeks and I'll prob stay on my suppressives during my training and likely double up that week until it's over and hopefully it won't cause me any issues. ill have to see how my body handles it before I sign up for anymore, which makes me SUPER depressed. Running is my thing and I'll be completely devastated if my body can't handle it anymore. Isn't it crazy how much of a double standard this thing creates?? Work out and be healthy to avoid an OB.. but not too intensely that you cause one. Manage your stress so you don't have an OB.. Yet, how in the world are you supposed to manage your stress when you are in the middle of one?? Lol ya know?? Ughhhh I guess we will eventually figure out how to listen to and treat our bodies to prevent/avoid future OBs! I think you'll be fine going back to the gym though :-)

Oh okay! The reason I ask about the blood test is because it could help you determine how long you've had h... My blood test was neg but my culture was positive, so they told me it was a new exposure.. But I knew exactly who it was and when it happened.. My first OB was literally DAYS after the SOB took advantage of me.. But thats neither here nor there at this point. You can get a discount prescription card online to help with the cost of meds too!

no apologies or tmi here lol!! I am not on BC myself, so I really have no idea about that. Since the H diagnosis, I have noticed an increase in discharge, but it's normal colored.. As for when you picked this up.. Did you have a blood test done? How were you actually diagnosed?

Trust me, newly diagnosed (August 2014), and I myself would likely have jumped off the deep end by now if it weren't for my daughter. I am also a mother to a beautiful, wonderful, amazing 2.5 year old.. If you have nothing else to live for because your life is now over as you see it, then live for your children. They need you.. And they need you happy and healthy. Herpes has a terrible stigma associated with it, and that really sucks for all of us. None of us want to be here right now on this herpes forum giving and receiving advice.. We would all much rather be H- living the lives we used to live.. But that's not an option at the moment. And when you put this into perspective, you've got to admit that it really could be SO much worse! I have my good and bad days, and when I say bad.. I mean baaaad. But its not life threatening.. It doesn't change WHO you are. Don't let this define you. And when I'm typing this to you right now, I'm also talking to myself, because there are days when I give myself this pep talk just to make it through the day. This diagnosis isn't easy to deal with for anyone, but you have to learn to live with it and make the best out of every day that you can. Because the alternative isn't very appealing either.. I wish you all the best!

Every day of my life since my diagnosis. I have a tendency to be high strung and easily frustrated and stressed out. I've been working very hard to calm down and woooooosahhhh.. Bad traffic could literally ruin my day.. Is it worth stressing into an OB?? Absolutely not! I've taken up yoga and meditation too. I try to get at least 5 minutes of quiet to myself to just breathe every day (I have a 2 and a half year old so quiet is rare lol) and I do a few yoga poses whenever I can. You will find out what your triggers are, just as I am. I had family visiting from out of town and that stressed me out.. I also broke my toe and haven't been able to run.. I think all of these things contributed to my OB.. So I'm really focusing on my stress levels and trying to make sure I'm being as good to my body as I can be. Once the OB clears and a sense of feeling "normal" comes back, it will be easier to manage the stress, fear and anxiety. I was actually getting to a point where it wasn't on my mind 24/7... I'll get back there and so will you!!! :-) if you need anything, feel free to message me anytime!!! Support really helps a lot..

Ahh yes, so much to look forward to lol! So much to learn!!! Thanks for sharing your experiences :-)

@seeker I love your posts!!! @hope29 everything you are feeling is completely normal. I was just there two months ago myself. Everything seeker said is right.. While I do still have good and bad days, it's defintely something that you can LIVE with, which is much better than the alternative. Be very thankful for the support of your fiancé! A lot of us don't have that support and are coping with this diagnosis completely alone. You're already doing the right thing.. Getting educated and informed is key! I'm currently dealing with my second OB and have been down in the dumps for days.. But Thankfully this forum keeps me informed and people are always here for support and advice.. I'm sure dancer will be along any time now with links for med info, OB help, and so much more :-) keep your chin up hun.. Relax.. Deep breath.. Rest and keep yourself as healthy as possible! As for what you're feeling.. We are all so different!! My first OB lasted 3 days.. Very mild symptoms.. I went straight on suppressives and stopped after a few weeks to see how my body would handle it.. I was med free for 4 weeks and just had my second OB which started Friday.. The entire time I was OB free I was super paranoid. I felt every tingle, itch, pain, etc down there that you could imagine.. I'm pretty sure most of it is in our head. A few days before my second OB, I had a very sore, red spot down there and a terrible pain in my left butt cheek.. I knew it was different than the other "tingles and pains" I had been feeling, but there was nothing visible there so I thought I was ok. That started on weds and by fri I found my first bump. Started on the meds Friday night and I think it's starting to clear up (fingers crossed). this OB was much more intense than my first.. A cluster of bumps as opposed to one bump and defibtely more pain.. But keep in mind that we are all different and out bodies will handle it differently.. My advice is to try and relax and keep your mind occupied. I wish I hadnt worried 24/7 about an OB when I was ob free.. After this clears up I'll likely stay on the suppressives for a while and see how I do. Good luck!! If you need anything, we are here for you :-)

Haha I hear you! I had shingles in college lol.. That def sucks too!!! yea my first OB was super mild.. One bump, no symptoms, just a little sensitivity, and cleared up in 3 days with meds. Started on suppressives but decided to stop and give my body a chance. I am also pretty healthy.. I run half marathons, work out a lot, and eat a pretty healthy diet. I made it 4 weeks with no meds before I had my second OB. I was OB free for a total of almost 8 weeks.. But the tingles and paranoia never went away and I was checking down there with a mirror every chance I got. While the OB itself sucks ROYALY.. The emotional and mental side sucks just as bad. It's on my mind 24/7.. Am I about to have an OB? Is that prodrome? Why does it itch? Is anyone going to accept me this way? Will I be alone forever? Will people think im dirty? Even when it's not "there" physically, it's there mentally.. Ya know? Meds and time make the OB go away, but what makes the heart heal? That's what I'm struggling with at the moment.. But as for my second OB, I think it's starting to clear up.. At least I'm hoping! I'm back on the meds to kick it out and I'll likely stay on suppressives for a bit after to see what happens.. I've got some races coming up soon and I cant afford to sit out because I'm "under the weather" :-/ Hope yours continues to heal and that you stay OB free :-) if you get that second one or feel down in the dumps, we are all here for you :-) anywho, keep that positivity coming.. I know I sure need it!!!

I also take 1g of lysine a day to help prevent OBs. Apparently that alone doesn't work for me bc now I'm on my second lol! I'm likely going to continue with the suppressive meds this time after my OB clears to see how I do. I also just started taking the airborne immune support + multivitamin to help boost my immune system and make sure I'm getting the proper nutrients :-)

And yes, it is normal to have OBs even on suppressive therapy :-)

I am currently in the midst of my second OB as well.. I was taking valtrex for the first OB and started suppressive therapy but decided to stop to see how my body would handle it. I was off the meds for almost 4 weeks when this second OB started. I started right back on the valtrex... Right to 1000mg twice a day.. My suppressive dosage was 500mg once a day.. My dr said it was fine to double up if I decided to use it for episodic treatment.. I decided to go to the 1000mg because thats what I was put on with my first OB. I've seen some people on here take 2 500mg pills a day for episodic.. I'm still trying to figure out what works with my body.. It's all trial and error for now!!! I'd say you're ok to double up, but definitely call your dr if you're concerned! Good luck!!!! :-)

Lol! Yea I haven't had the guts to try anything like that yet, other than the tea tree oil.. Maybe I'll try coconut oil too! Thank you!