YogaJ12

Do any of you get kind of itchy and random sensations around ovulation time? I feel like i always become itchy and have random shocks during ovulation time in my ass. It doesn't lead to an outbreak usually until I am near my period. But just something I have noticed with my body since I have had this virus since Sept 2014.

CONGRATS!!!

Thanks !!!! I'm going to get some b12 and probiotics and maybe take a bath tonight. I've been waking up early this week doing daily yoga, I had fallen off my yoga practice and things that make me feel happy. @2legit2quit @anna01

Way worse lol!!!! @anna01

So I had an outbreak Sunday bumps were gone by Tuesday , but I've been feeling tingly before during and after the bumps disappeared. Still feeling tingly, has anyone else experienced this? Is the herpes traveling back to the nerve or just shedding/active? It's driving me insane I feel like a crackhead lol. I really feel like my outbreaks have gotten worse as far as the number of them , I have them more often than I did in the beginning? I'm 10 months in and take my suppressives 800ml generic Zovirax.

That is awesome!!!! Needed that inspiration!

Virals* internalizing *

That is so true... I've always been really hard on myself, a perfectionist and a bit of a control freak so the fact that this is out of my control and I can't fix it is killing me. So yeah you're right it's me and not the virus. I am telling my own self it's my fault and I should of known better. I take 800ml anti vitals and my outbreaks have been inconsistent lsometimes once A month sometimes I get a month free or 2-3 in one month. I don't handle stress well so I make myself sick over thinking and internaliIng I need to work on that in my life in general. @2legit2quit

And yes loving someone else before you love yourself is disasterous and very draining. Self love must be already established or the relationship with be filled with a lot of insecurities and drama.

Thanks for your response @2legit2quit . I've been hAving an extreme downer week. I just want things to get better emotionally and physicaLly but i realize it's my responsibility to make myself feel better. Feeling sad and self loathing isn't the answer but it's hard especially when you have an outbreak. I can only hope for a better year with less outbreaks!

So I have finally caved, I will be seeing a therapist next week to help me accept what I cannot change, forgive myself for thinking I ever did anything wrong with trusting my ex, and forgiving him and separating the feelings I have of resentment whenever I experience an outbreak. Herpes was the final breaking point in my life telling me I need to reevaluate my life , find out who I really am, why I choose emotionally broken men, and why I am generally unfulfilled with my career and life. I realize I can either be my biggest ally or enemy. I have been my biggest enemy ever since I was diagnosed in september two days before my birthday. I'm mentally exhausted, drained and I am tired of self loathing. I internalize all my feelings and make myself physically ill resulting in outbreaks. I have yet to accept that I will have this forever and will have to live with it and move forward. I was looking for external validation of acceptance, to feel worthy and loved because I wasn't loving myself. I found someone who did accept my status and I craved their attention to the max and was very vulnerable. I realized it was unhealthy and I am in no shape or form to be sexually involved or emotionally involved with someone in this mental state. It's hard and I am more sensitive and emotional than I ever been in life. I am hoping that with therapy and changing my lifestyle that includes more adventure and less self loathing I can get through this dark time. THIS YEAR HAS BEEN COMPLETE FUCKING HELL!!!! ok im done venting. lol

Ha maybe the change in season! Who knows! But yea we gotta take better care of ourselves either way! @lasko @victoriaxxx

Kudos to you for being so positive and brave. This inspires people like me who are still suffering from the stigma and emotional effects. :)

Lmao @fitgirl yes! I just had like the biggest epitome like why the fuck am I settling for bullshit I know I wouldn't ever tolerate before. Like you said I have to work through this and nurture myself. I think a lot of this also had to do with rebuilding my confidence, sometimes I think we H+ people think we deserve less just because of our status. I am still gold with or without the virus. I am a great person with a great heart. So fuck off fuck boys! Lol

Oh and also on my period :(

I've seen in other threads that one thing H does for you is it wakes u up to whats working or not working for you in your present life. I have had 3 outbreaks in april currently experiencing my 3rd now which is probably the worst one I've ever had since my first one. I had to do some serious self evaluations and reflections and I realized I lost focus on my goal of self improvement and self-care. My focus has totally been on this new guy friend I had (first sexual partner post Herpes after my ex boyfriend) and resenting my ex. I was so caught up on trying to make my guy friend see my point of view on things regarding the confusion of our friendship and the mind games he plays that I was physically making myself ill. I am a person who internalizes stress and I realize that has to change or my outbreaks will not decrease but only increase! I've even switched meds and increased my dosage to 800MG for suppressive therapy and the outbreaks are still popping up. So I realize I have to stop giving fucks about petty shit and people who I have no control over and really focus on getting myself together. What i've learned is, when I don't sleep well, have hurt feelings, and have arguments with someone I care about outbreaks come to the rescue (being sarcastic). So people that are new to this virus , I am almost 8 months in. STOP WORRYING ABOUT IRRELEVANT SHIT AND PEOPLE. NEVER FIGHT FOR A SPOT IN SOMEONES LIFE, NEVER GIVE YOUR SELF AWAY FOR SOMEONE WHO JUST TAKES AND MANIPULATES U. FIGHT FOR YOU, LIVE FOR U AND TAKE CARE OF YOU.

I usually double up on my meds and use tea tee oil. I think I might start doubling the dosage of my suppressives. The doctor wanted me to do that with the valtrex but I decided to switch the anti/viral completely

Thank you @WCSDancer2010 they seem to like to come around the week I either ovulate or right after. I become extremely tingly during ovulation. I am guessing the hormonal fluctuations. Also I have been having insomnia the last 2 days including now and also got into a bad argument with my guy friend which we didn't talk for 4 days and I was stressing and overthinking. I ate pretty shitty too today. They usually go away pretty fast as far as actual sores lasting from hours to maybe 2 3 days. You're right it is still early and I am still learning what triggers it.

I know hate is a strong word. But I hate him

Just got over a outbreak last week and having another one. What gives? I switched medications from valtrex to Zovirax just last week cause clearly the valtrex wasn't helping. I'm on suppressives and still atleast get an outbreak once a month on my inner thigh.They are very mild but the emotional and mental stress I can't handle anymore. This is month 7. I'm so over this. I hate my ex for giving me this shit.

Yes you should be able to get it from like a natural food store. Don't know if you have a trader joes where you live that's where I get mine.

@chikitta13

LMAO @ cough I guess she was trying to be relatable. Yes herpes is just one of those things that tries to take you to a bad place. I think you should go forward with the disclosure and have your handy dandy disclosure sheet on hand just in case you forget some stuff. Believe it or not people will be accepting of the virus if they really like you and care for you. I was a nervous wreck disclosing but he took it better than I did. Asked some questions and what his chances were of catching it. And that when I am ready to take it to the next level he is as well. Also he reminded me that I was a beautiful person in and out despite my virus and that I inspired him , as he is going through his own demons. People will respect your bravery and courage. You may go further than just casual sex. You never know until you try.

You may want to try light cardio, yoga, something a little less intense while you have the sores. Also as for a natural route you can use tea tree oil and coconut oil. Tea Tree oil works wonders for me.

So I thought I was in a real good place, I've met some new people have started going on dates and have made a great new male friend that I disclosed to and took really well. He's become a best friend as we have both been through a lot with our ex's. We have even started a sexual relationship and taking all necessary precautions. He's very supportive of me and understanding. I am more paranoid than him as I make him wear condoms and boxers since my outbreaks are located in my inner thigh and anus. At this point we are just friends and that's all I can handle anyway. However, as I thought the virus was finally calming down (I am on month 7 since diagnosis) I came home yesterday thinking I was going to have some fun (sex) and I discovered I was having another outbreak and my mood suddenly went back to depressed mode. I hate being in this place mentally: I don't know how to get through this for good. I just want my body to get it under control. Anyway I took a second pill because I am already on supressive therapy and put tea tree oil on it and the irritation and bumps went away within hours. How is that even fucking possible? Sorry for the language I'm just so annoyed I got cock blocked by good ole herpes. Soon as I am happy it comes back to bite me in the ass. Feeling unsure today and like I will never forgive myself for this virus. -emotional wreck