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Donkrin

Accepted, then ghosted

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I (25M) went on a nice couple of dates with a girl (23F) I met on Bumble. We seemed to click somewhat, but there was an air of incompatibility I felt with us. I told her towards the end of the 2nd date I "have HSV2", and she just asked if that was the same thing as Herpes simplex virus 2. I told her yes, but she had a negative body posture  with her arms folded, a sign she was uncomfortable and closed off to the idea, but she verbally told me she was ok with it. We later kissed, parted ways, and I texted her I had a good time. I have not heard back from her since, and it's my first real rejection I've had since getting diagnosed 4 months ago. I'm a little frustrated and sad, but I don't want it to consume me knowing there's plenty of better matches out there. Has this happened to anyone else before?

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When I was first diagnosed (via blood test, I've never had an OB that I'm aware of in over 11 years), I told the guy that I was talking to...we'd had 1 date at that point and happened to have been texting when I found out the results. He immediately rejected me. I was upset.

And then I took a few months to just be, and then decided to get back out there...and met my SO. I disclosed to him on our first date and he immediately Accepted me. We've been together about a year and a half now and things are still great!

A couple months after my SO and I started dating, the first guy decided that he screwed up and wished he hadn't rejected me. Too bad for him. His loss...and honestly, his rejection was the best thing that could have happened to me. If he hadn't rejected me, I wouldn't have taken the time to reflect on me, to decide that I deserved better than that, and to raise my standards. Yes, I RAISED my standards! And then I met my amazing SO. If I was still messing with that first guy, I never would have met the love of my life.

So, get back out there, continue to be honest. You will meet someone amazing who won't be put off by HSV...someone who will love you for YOU and won't care about anything else.

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