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Anybody got any jokes?

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I realize that finding out you have herpes is tough and we will have moments of being depressed, feeling isolated, etc.

However, I am one of those people that uses humor as my coping mechanism and I always always try to find a way to laugh at it (the exception to this being death).

So lets share funny. stories, scenarios, etc to lighten the mood, eh?


I came up with a great Oprah joke. Due to the fact that so many people have herpes, it's like God woke up one day and was like "YOU get herpes, and YOU get herpes, EVERYBODY'S GETTING HERPES!" (reminiscent of when she gave away all the cars?)

When I had just found out I may have it (before the official diagnosis) I was in the elevator and crying. This woman leaned over and said "God will take care of you." Then I realized that HE must be watching this like a soap opera. "Yeah that's right, lets give the atheist herpes. But wait, lets throw in a God rearing woman just to give her a dash of hope only to take that away." Or he was just like "that is what you get for being an atheist."

On finding out your partner is also herpes positive- "the bad news is, you got herpes too. The good news is- we can have sex without condoms."

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As for making light of my situation. The running joke in my house is "Don't do that, you're gonna make me flare!"


And my friend was over for support of the situation and as I was putting some lidocaine on, it stung and to cover up I was screaming I said "Awwwww, FREAKOUT!!" And my friend came into the bathroom and said you should be singing "Awwwww, BREAK OUT!". We were laughing gor a good 15 minutes. And then I kept singing disco inferno referencing my.current state haha. XD

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I use awkward humor always...oh jeez do I make some bad puns...my Heterolifemate and I frequent reddit and LOVE rage comics...well they always use the term "herp derp" which is where we snagged the term of endearment for my love bumps. Because it's way to close to the actual name we just say derp in text and person "hey how's derpin along going" "oh ya know same old same old" meaning I haven't had an outbreak since my first (I need to find some wood to knock on right meow)

Herpes inferno...so many bad puns so little time...I love it!

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