Positive results

[Helzbelz88]

We'll got the results today - sure enough positive.

 

Ever feel like you're crying because you know it's sad and your meant to but you don't really need to, kinda how it was today.

 

As much as I know things will be different from here this site and everything I have read has helped me work on the positive change even before the results were in.

I know there will be hard days but I'm not nearly as down about the diagnosis as I thought I would be.

 

Before this I was already trying to work on my self esteem and how I treated myself- I almost feel like this has happened for a reason and that I needed this to work out just how important I am.

 

I still have a long way to go for sure, but the light at the end of the tunnel gets a bit brighter with each day I get up and go on with life and be the best me I can - what else is there to do.

 

:)

[WCSDancer2010]

@Helzbelz88

 

H acts as a magnifying glass on our insecurities ... that which is already there will come out, and you have no choice but to face it or succumb to it.... and I know which one I choose ;)

 

We're here for you as you adjust to your "new normal"....

 

(((HUGS)))

 

 

[HerryTheHerp]

Alright, do you like Star Wars? I do. Loved Empire Strikes Back. You remember that scene when Luke goes into the cave and Vader's waiting for him?

 

This is your Jedi moment. It's scary as hell, but you've got the knowledge, the information, and the support to get through it. Now, pull out your light saber and get ready to kick some serious butt.

 

Remember, the only thing you're going to discover is who you are on the inside; and like Dancer said, this will bring all of that out. The good news is that as it comes out, you can choose to keep it, or change it, and become the person you really want to be.

[Helzbelz88]

Thank you both.

 

After soccer training tonight one of my friends who is a bit younger than me was going on about her latest guy and how it's great they really got to know each other in the week they spent together before they had sex... Made me cringe just listening to it.

 

Actually there were a lot of things said tonight that before H would have barely registered but was hard to not think about tonight. Had to keep telling myself to just shrug it off, just shrug it off.

 

Hopefully in time it won't be the main thing on my mind all time.

 

[WCSDancer2010]

You see!!! H is already teaching you something!!! It's opened your eyes to the craziness of our culture today, where everything is instant and "getting to know each other" happens in the blink of an eye ... so each time you cringe, remember it's because you are in a different place than they are ... that you had a lesson that they have yet to learn (and there are all kinds of ways to get those lessons and believe me, H is minor compared to some like a 20 year loveless marriage or rape).

 

In time. perhaps you can impart your new wisdom to others ... not by disclosing necessarily, but by just helping them to see that a "relationship" is not founded in a week, and that falling in love with a person's SOUL takes time ... and the lovely hormones of sex will cloud our thinking and make us stay in relationships that are not healthy for us.

 

For now, just observe yourself, and your friends .... you are in the middle of a big learning time .... and I'm willing to bet when you come out the other side there will be a new YOU waiting who will blow your mind ;)

 

(((HUGS)))

[Helzbelz88]

I know it's possible because I've read it on here but I'm having a low moment.

 

Can't shake the thought of what guy is going to take the time to get to know a girl without sex let alone a girl with herpes.

 

I know the correct answer is a guy worth my time - just having trouble getting myself to believe it'll happen one day.

[Orngpeelmafia]

"Can't shake the thought of what guy is going to take the time to get to know a girl without sex let alone a girl with herpes."

 

Ok so lemme kick that thought out of your noggin right now :)

 

You. Are. AMAZING. And herpes isn't going to change that. Nothing will if you don't give it the power to. I had a hard time believing it for a while...but what I didn't realize is I was using herpes as an out...it was easier just to blame herpes and throw in the towel. Well lemme tell you I'm glad I changed my mind and started going out again. It was scary but it was also very eye opening. People don't care as soon as they hear the facts IF you're honest and courageous...and anyone who finds it to be a deal breaker probably wasn't worth it. It sucks sure but it really isn't any different than a guy saying "ew you have tattoos that's really not attractive" or something. It hurts to hear but in the end it's their loss not mine :)

 

 

[WCSDancer2010]

Ok - time for you to read by Wingman blog:

 

http://herpeslife.com/using-herpes-as-your-wing-man/

 

http://herpeslife.com/herpes-forum/discussion/3309/successful-herpes-disclosure-but-not-for-the-reasons-you-might-think (Herpes Wingman example Mazedaze818 )

[Helzbelz88]

Thanks guys :)

 

So I decided to tell a friend, I was crying as I wrote the text. Sent a long first intro one telling them I needed to tell them something that sometimes changes people's minds about a person and that it shouldn't but it does. So he said hit me with it.

 

Told him and his response was

"ooh that sux, have you been to a doc or got some meds. A friend of mine has it, she got married about two months ago"

 

Nice to have a friend get that it is something and that I'll need support at times but not see it as a big deal.

 

Now it's my head that needs to think that and on a full time bases :)

 

***i read the blog after I'd done it- which kinda made me laugh. I will continue reading it until I don't need to :)

[WCSDancer2010]

You see! So many people know someone with it or have it themselves .... and a REAL friend won't care or see you as any different. And for THAT you can thank H for showing you that this guy is a REAL friend ;)

 

(((HUGS)))