Tingling but no OB? Does this happen?

[Athena]

Hey, so i'm still very new to this...it will be a month since my first OB in two days and I started taking acyclovier (?). Is it normal to get the tingle sensation down my leg but have no swollen lymph node and no real pain vaginally? Does this mean i'm still having/will have an OB? I'm due to have my first sexual experience next week since my diagnosis and I want to be as careful as possible. I get tingles all down my right leg through my foot. Anyone else experience this? I want to learn how it feels when an OB is coming on to protect others but I'm not sure how.

[kaybee]

The tingling feeling is normal (especially in the begining) it means that your body is shedding the virus. Unfortunately, h is contagious not only during outbreaks but when your body is shedding the virus. The only way to know your shedding is getting used to your body's signs (numbness, tingling, and itchiness are common). Your body tends to shed the most during the first year as you haven't built up antibodies to the virus yet (and you're also the least likely to Notice it because you're not used to the signs!). A month after my first ob I had a sex (I had no idea about shedding) and immediently spread the virus to my super loving supportive ex boyfriend. It's my biggest regret in life. I would really recommend you wait to have sex until you have no symptoms and use not only suppressive daily acyclovir but also condoms (especially during the first year!) I know you just want to have sex and your body feels so off and it's sad but I really wish someone had told me to hold off on having sex until I knew when my body was telling me I'm shedding. A little over a year later I can tell EXACTLY when even a tiny thing is off and feel that I could protect a H- partner in a way I never could have a month after my first outbreak. Goodluck and lots of love, I know right now is a rough time but it only gets easier <3

[WCSDancer2010]

@kaybee is right ...

 

Just want to add that there's a ton of ways to be intimate when you are having an OB/shedding. If you have any possibility that you are shedding, just use that time to get creative with your partner :)

 

http://herpeslife.com/keeping-your-partner-herpes-free-can-be-super-sexy/

[Athena]

Soo...I should wait a year before I have sex again? I might die :(

[kaybee]

Haha I wouldn't say a whole year haha that's just a general guideline for when you have the most viral activity. Everyone's different, but I would give yourself atleast a few months..or as soon as you feel like the tingling/itchiness/any "off feelings" aren't constant and you know when you're shedding. And when you DO decide to have sex you have to decide on daily medicine or condoms or both :) but the most important point is to just never have sex when you have any symptoms. I know it seems like a lot now but I've barely had it over a year and I would say probably after 3 or 4 months the symptoms stopped being constant and I had better control over my body. I would focus on eating healthy, managing stress, and working out. Take care of yourself, it makes a huge difference! Also like Dancer said there are a lottt of things you can do besides sex that are perfectly safe :)

[whitedaisies]

I am going on 4 months and it's torture!!!

[kaybee]

Every ones body is different! I think if natural methods (limiting stress, eating well and exercise) aren't working then you can consider suppressive therapy. Generally, people get less and less obs with time (luckily that was my case) and therefore, have less of a risk of spreading H.

[Athena]

@kaybee omgggggggg you're a strong person! Let's see..i'm in an accelerated grad school (not stressful AT ALL), taking care of my sick parents (what's stress again?) oh and dealing with this new diagnosis while working with 300 people underneath me....yup no stress :D I'm on acyclovier (?) since day #1 of diagnosis and condoms will always be used no matter what from now on lol ugh.... but goodness gracious I hear what you're saying and while it makes sense...i've never ever gone a month without sex...let alone a few months. x_x But, *sigh* I will do what it takes to protect him. *hangs head*

@Whitedaisies *big hugs love*

[whitedaisies]

I meant 4 months with no sex. :(

[WCSDancer2010]

Honey... I just have to put this out there...

 

SEX DOESN'T HAVE TO MEAN PENETRATION!!!!!

 

There's sooooooo much you can do together. Look into things like Tantric Sex, role play, toys, etc.

 

And as for the stress... just take each moment, each challenge as it comes. It's all we can do. I have a father in Fla (1000 miles away) who has congestive heart failure and schitzophrenic tendencies ... I go down there every 2-3 months and I just have to deal with what comes each day. It's all I can do. Over-stressing about tomorrow won't change anything and it will just leave me too exhausted to deal with the emergencies and challenges.

 

And you may have a day come when you havent had an OB in months and you are on the antivirals and you know your symptoms and you will choose to lose the condom. I spent 3 yrs with a man who had ED so condoms were not an option... he never got it from me but I abstained (and we got REALLY creative!) if I had so much as a pimple, even tho I was sure it wasn't an OB, and our sex life was great ;)

 

(((HUGS)))

[WCSDancer2010]

BTW....

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ currently 9 months without sex... and that was only once then the guy decided he didn't want to drive 45 min for a relationship :p

 

Thanks heavens for my vibrator!!!! LOL

[Athena]

ahahaha WCSDancer2010 you crack me up xD We should have a thread for toy recommendations :p Oh but how I crave penetration ughhhhh! And..I kinda really want to be intimate with someone who knows and cares about me enough to still want to go there...especially since I haven't had sex since my diagnosis :/ I want to feel comfortable with myself and truthfully....i'm ready to bash some skulls if I don't get my fill soon (sorry graphicness) lol. 9 months?! You're a super hero!! Any guy who wouldn't drive 45 minutes for you has no idea what a wonderful woman he's missing out on!!!

[whitedaisies]

Ditto Athena!!!

 

Not quite at the bashing of skulls but I would say damn close.

[kaybee]

Hahaha i feel like I need to go out and buy a vibrator now. Athena, I totally understand wanting to have sex (especially when someone loves/cares about you enough to after disclosing) but you have to keep your partner safe and that might mean waiting a bit. Good luck to you <3

[whitedaisies]

Just bought one last week!

[WCSDancer2010]

Vibrator=Girls best friend ...

 

@Athena - well, a good dildo/vibrator may not be the same thing, but it, er, fills the void when you can't get the real thing...LOL

 

Re: 9 months - I just can't do one night stands. There's times I wish I could. I need to be IN the relationship to get into sex and really enjoy it. *sigh* ... ugh ....

[whitedaisies]

OK...wayyyyyy too many girls on this site...LOL!

 

I think being "in" the relationship enhances the sexual experience too. Don't sigh Dancer, what's the point of having sex just to have it....anyone can have 6 out of 10 sex, I will pass thank you. I want 10/10 sex and I will wait til I can get it!!!!!

[whitedaisies]

Sometimes I hate being on this site b/c herpes and sex seems to go hand and hand and it just makes me realize how little I am getting. But happy people are getting some....just want some over here!!!! And not any old run in the mill sex either!!!! With constant outbreaks makes it merely a fantasy! :(

[whitedaisies]

I see your "sigh and ugh" and raise you "ho hum and sucks to be me"

[WCSDancer2010]

LOL .... thanks for the laugh and Good Night friend!!!

[whitedaisies]

Night friend

 

:)

[Athena]

Ahahahaha! Can't stop laughing! @kaybee Yes *sigh* I know, you're right :( WCSDancer2010 I'll have to plan a shopping trip soon! @Whitedaisies Lady, there are TONS of men that DON'T CARE! Every single guy i've told HAS NOT CARED! I made a dummy pof account and talked to a few guys just to see what it'd be like to tell people....NOT A ONE CARED!

 

Ladies, thank you for the laugh! Really great to wake up to! :D

[whitedaisies]

Well maybe u can be my wingman. Lol.