People who refuse to accept, let alone acknowledge, that people get herpes even w condom use.

[2Legit2Quit]

I'm finind a disturbing trend among men I've spoke to who are H+, disregarding this notion and stating they don't think it to be true and is all rubbish. This was convo recently took place w someone I met on a H dating site. Shocker, like it seems a lot of them do, eventually end up propositioning you for sex. I told him I couldn't imagine myself ever being w someone who believes condoms are to protect him from herpes, let alone HPV and view him as a health risk. He claims he's done much research on this and has spoken to doctors about it and I know that's just a load of Bs. I know debating the issue further, will make me being a female come off as a bitch, as it seems most men struggle w a knowledgeable female. I just HATE! HATW HATE HATE!! FALSE information being spread around.

 

I have found that the men in the H+ positive sites, just go straight into trying to have sex e you more than a guy you mee t other ways. I have not met up w any guy that has approached me w that, NIR have I been w anyone physically since my diagnosis. I almost feel like the H + men, have less respect for an H+ woman and think she'll be promiscuous.

.anyone else experience this?

 

What are you supposed to day when someone rejects this information about condoms? To me, I feel someone who has information at their fingertips and reject such a notion based on their opinion, is choosing so, because then it takes the fun out of things and having to. Be more responsible.. I've found this w the vast majority of men when yiu discuss STDs w them and this was pretty H for me, as well post H. What is wrong w people today? So hard not to be disgusted w humanity. I feel it is intentionally choosing to be ignorant, because then they aren't "responsible". Losing faith in men altogether at this point. Alls they want is sex and having H, makes it easier to spot those lightly treaded innuendos men try to sneak inin, that normally when you're not thinking about STD risks, would be overlooked.. Classic case of herpes wingman I guess.

 

I'm glad for it giving that to me, but I seriously have lost all hope in men at this point. I am convinced sex feels better for them, to be such animals about it. :-(

[WCSDancer2010]

I haven't had the problem with the H+ men expecting me to give them sex but I haven't really done a lot of dating on there anyway.

 

What to say when they reject your info? Send them info that they can't deny: If you give them a hard copy, highlight and underline the bits I have below ... if you send it to them, send it italicized/underlined/highlighted like I have here:

 

http://www.cdc.gov/std/Herpes/STDFact-Herpes-detailed.htm

 

How do people get genital herpes?

 

Infections are transmitted through contact with lesions, mucosal surfaces, genital secretions, or oral secretions. HSV-1 and HSV-2 can also be shed from skin that looks normal. In persons with asymptomatic HSV-2 infections, genital HSV shedding occurs on 10% of days, and on most of those days the person has no signs or symptoms. [4] Generally, a person can only get HSV-2 infection during sexual contact with someone who has a genital HSV-2 infection. Transmission most commonly occurs from an infected partner who does not have a visible sore and may not know that he or she is infected. [5]

 

How common is genital herpes?

CDC estimates that, annually, 776,000 people in the United States get new herpes infections.23. Genital herpes infection is common in the United States. Nationwide, 15.5 % of persons aged 14 to 49 years have HSV-2 infection. 22 The overall prevalence of genital herpes is likely higher than 15.5%, because an increasing number of genital herpes infections are caused by HSV-1. 2 HSV-1 is typically acquired in childhood; as the prevalence of HSV-1 infection has declined in recent decades, people may have become more susceptible to genital herpes from HSV-1.

 

How can herpes be prevented?

Correct and consistent use of latex condoms can reduce the risk of genital herpes. 19-20 However, outbreaks can occur in areas that are not covered by a condom.

The surest way to avoid transmission of sexually transmitted diseases, including genital herpes, is to abstain from sexual contact, or to be in a long-term mutually monogamous relationship with a partner who has been tested and is known to be uninfected.

 

http://www.nytimes.com/ref/health/healthguide/esn-herpes-expert.html

 

EXPERT Q&A

Understanding Genital Herpes

By ERIC SABO

 

Dr. Peter A. Leone is an associate professor at the University of North Carolina School of Medicine and Public Health. He also directs the H.I.V./sexually transmitted disease prevention program for the state of North Carolina and serves on the National Coalition of STD Directors, a group of public health officials who promote awareness of sexually transmitted diseases.

 

Q: How effective are condoms for protecting against genital herpes?

 

A: Condoms work best in preventing sexually transmitted diseases that are spread through ejaculate and vaginal fluid. But any skin-to-skin contact puts you at risk for herpes. Since most people are not covered in latex when having sex, condoms are not as protective as we see with H.I.V., chlamydia or gonorrhea.

 

Still, using a condom can reduce herpes transmission by 50 percent, and that’s true for men and women. It’s not a home run, but it does work. There’s been a tendency to say that it’s either all are none. Unless you wear condoms 100 percent of the time, there’s no benefit. That’s not true. Wearing condoms 25 percent of the time can reduce your risk by half.

[2Legit2Quit]

And then if they still think they know better and react poorly to you providing proof, as if you're a know it all?

 

 

[WCSDancer2010]

Then you just say "Gee - glad you know more than the CDC and the experts ... I'll be watching for your appearance on Dr Oz with all the latest info that you seem to be so much of an expert about ..."

 

And walk away :)

 

"There is no point to arguing with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level, then beat you with experience"

 

 

[2Legit2Quit]

Hahahah! That made me laugh! I'm just amazed at how people choose to be ignorant on purpose, so they cannot have accountability on it

[MMissouri]

I think the attitude about sex on the positive sites (I've seen this mentioned before) is because if you notice, one thing people bring up about being positive is the loss of the freedom to just have casual, no holds barred sex. So.. I'm thinking some of those H+ men feel that with a h+ partner, they can find that freedom again.

 

Just my 2 cents. lol

[2Legit2Quit]

Yep, I couldn't agree w you more... Makes sense