I'm just smh

[havefaith427]

So I haven't been on in a long time. So many things have happened. I was 4 months pregnant with my son and I developed chorio so my body went into safety mode and pushed him out... He passed away once that happened. Well my fiance (who is also my giver) left me 2 months later... and he was cheating on me.... So I started to get back into the dating game. I tried dating sites that are for people with H. I went on a few dates with people I met off of there. But I started to like someone who didn't have it. Since I have terrible anxiety I let my best friend tell him about my H. He said that he wouldn't let that get in the way of his happiness. Then I also had an ex trying to get back with me and he couldnt get the hint that I was just not feeling it. So I told him and now he wont respond to me.... :( I mean its a good thing because he will leave me alone but still hurts my feelings that someone would profess their feelings to me and then all of a sudden want nothing to do with me. Another ex told me that even after 7 years of not being together, he still loved me and never loved anyone else... Well I told him and he ditched me too.... It just hurts...

[havefaith427]

But of course I am going to be with the guy who does not care that I have it but what if I give it to him? I know he doesn't care but I do. If I knowingly give it to someone I couldn't forgive myself....

[WCSDancer2010]

@havefaith427

 

Sooo... you told the ex to make him leave you alone, but when he did, you took it personally.... can you see that's perhaps a little messed up??? LOL

 

But of course I am going to be with the guy who does not care that I have it but what if I give it to him? I know he doesn't care but I do. If I knowingly give it to someone I couldn't forgive myself....

 

Ok - so think of it this way...

 

**I assume you drive a car

**and I assume if that is correct, you may occasionally drive your lover/BF somewhere

**And you BOTH know there is ALWAYS a risk of a car accident no matter how careful you are

**But you drive him anyway, right? Do you obsess day and night that you might injure/kill him every time he gets in your car? I doubt it.

**Why is the possibility of passing on H any different? At least it won't kill him!!!

 

Think on it :)

 

 

[havefaith427]

Well thank you for that outlook! Its true. It won't kill him lol! But you're right about the ex... However, the guy that didn't care that I had it... he became my bf and well we are all human so we ended up hooking up. However he was extremely small... I mean majorly small so now I'm completely turned off... No clue what to do... it was not satisfying at all :( @WCSDancer2010

[WCSDancer2010]

OMG!!! Small doesn't mean unsatisfying! (I hear you in that larger works "better" for me!) But there are TONS of other ways to get off!!!

 

http://herpeslife.com/keeping-your-partner-herpes-free-can-be-super-sexy/

http://herpeslife.com/herpes-forum/discussion/5807/list-the-ways-to-protect-my-partner-from-getting-herpes-hsv2 Safe alternatives to sex

http://www.herpes.org/whitepaper-alternatives-in-intimacy/

 

[2Legit2Quit]

How small is small? Lol.... Because the best sex I've had, has been w two guys that were smaller than average by a lil bit and they knew how to work it better

[havefaith427]

Ummm I mean really small... Like maybe 3 inches and half an inch in diameter... and the motion in the ocean was not rocking the boat if you know what I mean lol!

[2Legit2Quit]

Yikes, yeah, that happened to me once... It was awkward and those type seem to be one pump chumps too... Yeah I don't blame you. That's why you gotta feel the baggage before you get to the stage of sex. Lol..

[havefaith427]

hahahaha! My friend was like you gotta try on shoes before you buy them! Of course with H I cant unless the person knows or also has it lol. But yeah I'm just very unsatisfied. It wasn't even good in foreplay either... When he touched my breast I would kiss him just so it didn't seem awkward for me to just lay there like a dead fish... Ugh...

[Bambina3]

If you like him, go toy shopping ;)

I had a tiny one too once lol but

He was great at oral and toy usage

[WCSDancer2010]

I think Bambina hit the nail on the head:

 

If everything else about him is what you want, get toys and get creative... see if he's willing to learn. At least give it a go. If he's just not able to get to a point where you can enjoy the sex enough, then maybe move on. Some men just don't want to learn, others are very willing... ahem... students.... LOL... if you get a good learner, you never know what might happen...

 

As for small, the first or second time we were together, HE said that it probably wouldn't work because of the difference in size (most women who have had kids have a little extra room unfortunately) ... but turned out he was a willing learner for what I needed, he was great at oral, and I learned things that revved his engines too... we had a decent sex life... but I finally left because there were other things that just didn't work for me.

 

Bottom line - if you aren't feeling it in "both" areas (emotional and physical) then there's no use in continuing but if you like him otherwise, give him a shot ... and start looking in the Adult section on Amazon :)

 

[havefaith427]

Yah well I left him because he was such a Debbie downer, was always negative, and could never take any type of criticism

[2Legit2Quit]

Well good for you, for seeing a red flag and doing what's best for youyou! Hang in there!