Almost positive I have genital herpes and I'm freaking out and have no one

[Sb9724]

Hi..I'm 18, and recently starting getting a bunch of painful sores in my down there area.. There around my butthole now too, which they weren't before. They hurt so bad, and I'm always uncomfortable... I even have random cuts down there like I've been ripped? I know it's herpes... The more I read about it, I'm so scared. I cry every time I go to the bathroom or bed. I just don't know what to do, I'm so scared to go to the doctors im beyond embarrassed... I can't tell my mom I couldn't.. I feel like everyone would look at me so differently. It's really affecting me emotionally and physically. I can't take it, like I really don't know what to do... I try to use the bathroom as little as possible because it hurts so bad every time I do, I really want to die but I know I can't just end my life because of this...

[Sil88]

Hey sk, you're gonna be fine. I know how you're feeling; we've all been there and it sucks big time. But this'll be a test for you, and make you a stronger person in the long run. This thing won't kill you - you will beat it and keep it locked down eventually, and future you will thank yourself for not doing anything drastic whilst you were reeling in shock. If it helps to get your feelings out here, then do more of that - writing here helps to expand that bubble you feel like you're in.

 

Having said that, you should get a professional to take a look and confirm or rule out herpes, and tell you which type it is. I think it's planned parenthood you need in the US. They could also give you antivirals to help you clear up those pesky bumps. Apparently, peeing in the bath will help with the pain.. dilutes the ammonia which causes stinging.

 

Have you spoken to the person you think could've passed it to you?

[Sb9724]

Thanks for writing back! I have spoke to them and told them I think I have something & they said they got tested and everything came back negative... But idk.. I don't no longer talk to them, but I plan to go to the doctors soon, but I'm literally positive about what it is... And it really sucks. It's seriously stressing me out, & it's hard not having anyone to talk to about this, I'm so happy I found this website... It just hurts so bad, and i just get more blisters each day it seems like.. I never thought something like this would happen to me, but it's making me so upset I can barley keep up an appetite.. Im so scared about going to the doctor but I want to get it over with.. And I know I need medication or it could get worse... I can't believe how horrible this is :(

[Sb9724]

Sorry I sound so dumb I don't even know how to talk about this... I'd like someone to talk to about this as I go through it.. Just because I don't have a clue what to do and it's nice to relate

[janedoe]

I think you should make an appoinment with PP first thing in the morning. They can really help you and they are good at their jobs.

 

If this is really herpes, the first outbreak sucks. However antivirals will speed up the healing process and you will feel better soon. After that you can keep it in check and start taking care of yourself. You don't have to suffer in physical pain like this.

 

I think you are in panic and aren't making logical decisions right now. Take a deep breath, calm yourself and start making good decisions. Crying in bed and bathroom isn't helping anybody right now. You are not alone, you are reaching out which is good.

[janedoe]

Also, if you are referring to your past partners by "them", herpes isn't usually included in the regular STI panel. So, if this is herpes, there is a big possibility that although they got tested, their doctors didn't include herpes blood test so they don't know they have it. Sometimes, herpes shows no symptoms but sheds silently. However, like I said you have to take care of yourself first, then you can notify your partners.

[Sb9724]

So planned parenthood is the best place to go? And yeah this OB is horrible.. And would be my first, it's so uncomfortable all day long.. And I work on my feet all day but in a way I guess that's better then sitting, I know it dosnt help to cry... It just is really stressing me out I'm so scared how this will affect my future

[janedoe]

So, I am a newbie so I can't speak from experience but I believe that in time this will be a tiny thing in my life like yeast infections (I get them all the time :s). You should read the herpes veterans section. People have this virus longer than I am and they didn't miss anything in life - life, marriage, kids, success you name it. Also, I advise you to watch Adrial's videos too.

 

Yes PP is the place the go. Don't stress out yourself more than you need to. Make the appointment, talk to doctors than you can start planning your future. If this is really herpes, it is not a big deal. You will be just fine.

[Sb9724]

Well thank you so much. It means a lot and if it wasn't for this page idk what I'd do right now but reading everyone else's post and experiences helps a lot. And talking about it helps a lot too.. I never thought I'd be able to talk to anyone about this

[Bambina3]

Did you make your apt for the test ?

[tt88]

tip for going to the bathroom. When I had my first OB it was that bad too and I remember I would run in the shower and use the shower head while I was going so that it would dilute the urine from the burning and omg it helped made it bareable.

[Emil65]

Go and get tested and make sure that you tell them you are concerned that you may have herpes. If you don't they might not test for it. It is NOT included in the standard std tests at planned parenthood which I think is crazy but if you ask to be examined and tested for it they will test for it. PP is great and will help you figure out what is going on. Don't worry you will be okay the first OB is the worst in my experience.