Ok this one is tricky

[howvery]

Ok so I promised myself that I would not date for a long while just to keep my head on straight. And I'm going to stick to it.

 

That said, there's this guy. I've known him forever and we even hooked up a couple of times a few years ago, but it didn't end up sticking into a relationship for various reasons. We chatted recently online and talked for an hour and a half. He was totally flirting with me but I kept ignoring it.

 

Here's why I'm freaked out--I've always wanted it to work out with this dude. Obviously, if he's not ok with my HSV-2, it's decided. That's ok.

 

What I'm worried about is-- if he does ask me out again, and if it is going in that direction/the spark is still there, and WHEN i disclose... I don't want to freak the shit out of him about his own health. I have no way of knowing but i am like 95% sure that our dates were well before I was exposed to HSV-2. Basically I don't want to tell him and have him be like "Jesus, were you ever gonna tell me? We used to have sex and you should have." It's both a past and a future partner disclosure! AGH. Anyone have thoughts here?

[Sail]

Simply state the simple truth. That you think you were exposed after him and found out your diagnosis after your connection with him. Keep it simple. Ask him if he keeps up to date on stds tests. If he doesn't he needs to get a recent one for your protection as well. Both of you may have it. Rules to live by, never assume anyone is without something. As for rejection. If he rejects you then let it go and find someone that sees more than a diagnosis. Find someone who will celebrate who you are :)!

[MMissouri]

I agree with Sail.

[whoknew]

I agree with Sail as well. One reminder though is that routine std tests don't include herpes testing (at least not in Canada). So you'd have to ask him to get type specific Herpes testing done as well........

[Sail]

Yep its easy. Just request that they add it and good luck