GO OUT AND MEET OTHERS!

[Athena]

Seriously! Go out! I joined a meetup group for people with H in San Diego and WOW! I am sooooo glad I did! There were 30ish people there and let me tell you: It didn't feel like a dreary, depressing, emo gathering for a funeral! Everyone was vibrant, happy and beaming with happiness! I think often times we can feel like we are having to deal with all of this on our own and while forums are helpful and a source of positivity, we can forget that there are real people living happily with this. I have been inspired, motivated and filled with hope. It felt just like any other social gathering i've been to but with one key difference: everyone was genuinely happy and full of real support and understanding. They meet at restaurants, go scuba diving, snorkeling, whale watching, hiking, hold parties and game nights JUST LIKE EVERYONE ELSE. Not only that, but apparently there are GIGANTIC SOCIAL NETWORKS for people with H where people meet IRL all over the freaking place. For those of you that feel alone and unable to talk to people....I would STRONGLY STRONGLY STRONGLY encourage you to go out and join some of these groups. Go. See them face to face and take a deep breath and comfort in that you can talk honestly and openly about everything to people who won't judge you and who understand. Please. Please. Please. Go. Do not fall victim to your own sadness and woe. YOU ARE IN CONTROL OF YOUR OWN HAPPINESS. ....and you know what? I got three numbers from some GORGEOUS MEN that were at the get together ;) and the best part? I won't have to worry about them running away when we have "the talk." :D

[Athena]

I apologize for the repetitiveness and jumbled speech lol im more than a bit tipsy after too many rounds of delicious shots :D But please go, you are not alone. Sometimes seeing others in person who are going through and have been through what you are experiencing can really drive home that you CAN and WILL get through this.

[kaybee]

Where did you find this group in San Diego? I'm from the area too!

[whitedaisies]

So happy for you Athena!!!!

[seeker]

I joined 2 meetup groups in the central florida area but as of yet haven't been able to make a meetup ( only been at this for less than 2 weeks tho) I did talk to the organizer for a couple of hours and she was great and I plan on making a few meetups soon. the florida ones are private and passcoded just an fyi and it may take a day or two to get things lined up. I set up a gmail account for that meetup account as I wasn't sure how it would link to my other meetup account. apparently you can hide your groups tho.

[Athena]

@kaybee make a meetup.com account (don't link your facebook account to it and you can hide your groups if you like so no one can search them). The group link is:

It takes a day or two to get approved since it is a "private/secret" group but the organizer is AMAZING and everyone is really friendly and incredible.

@Whitedaisies seriously love, give it a try *heart*

@Seeker, when you are ready go out and do it! It's the second best thing I did for myself after I found out (after joining this forum of course)!

[WCSDancer2010]

This is awesome! I hadn't thought of using Meetup for looking for Herpes groups (use it a lot for hiking and other stuff).... BRILLIANT!

 

Pass our info on to them too ..because people will hit a wall at all hours and we generally have people on here at all times.

 

LOVE IT!!

[WCSDancer2010]

BTW, I just looked - couldn't get a search with Herpes but got good results with HSV:

 

http://www.meetup.com/find/?%2Ffind%2F=undefined&allMeetups=false&keywords=HSV&radius=Infinity&userFreeform=Kingston%2C+NY&mcId=z12401&mcName=Kingston%2C+NY&sort=recommended&eventFilter=mysugg

[Athena]

@Dancer will do! Most of the groups don't have "herpes" directly in the name but have "H" or something somewhat related to it. There are hundreds of social networking groups on fb that are "secret" that you have to be invited to and everyone posts about 10+ activities a week in any city you are in :D

[whitedaisies]

I am going to the h opp weekend!

 

I am excited and nervous at the same time. First trip on my own! LOL

 

So baby steps for me for socializing in my area; I feel kind of better going anonymously to this conference away from home where no one knows me til I am confident enough to step out in my own.

 

Wish you were coming!

[kaybee]

I'm honestly terrified to go to a meet up and I have no idea why other than being afraid of not fitting it haha. I haven't had much interaction in person with the h community especially people I don't know! Athena, this is a dumb question and not really important but what's the average age of people in the group? Are there any young people? I know I'm on the younger side of people with H being 20 so I'm afraid of not fitting it with everyone

[ihaveittoo]

Back in the AOL days H+ people would put 437737 in thier profile. It spells herpes on a telephone keypad. Might try searching with that, some folks may still use it.

[Athena]

@whitedaisies that's still great progress! I hope it's AMAZING :D

@Kaybee just do it! I promise you'll feel better :) Join the group I linked and just take a look at events that are posted. Most seemed to be late 20s- early 40s for the particular meet up I went to. But that doesn't mean there aren't younger ones too!

[WCSDancer2010]

@Kaybee

 

In a group like this, age is just a number - you "fit in" because you are all dealing with H and they are all dealing with most of the things you are experiencing...

 

http://www.upworthy.com/a-4-year-old-girl-asked-a-lesbian-if-shes-a-boy-she-responded-the-awesomest-way-possible Ash Beckhams Closet Ted Talk

 

Kirsty Spraggon Ted Talk “You are only as Sick as Your Secrets

 

[sjj238]

I thought about going to a meet up group like this but the thing holding me back was the ages of the people there. I worry about being the youngest there. Was there a range in ages at this meet up?

[WCSDancer2010]

Don't worry about your age. You would be meeting with people who have something in common, which in this case happens to be herpes. That's all that matters. If anything being amongst people who might be a little older than you and perhaps have a little more life experience may actually help you. how you experience herpes really doesn't have much to do with age, except that perhaps those of us who are a little older might have a little bit more perspective about how insignificant it actually ends up being in the grand scheme of things ;)