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Posted

So I just need to vent a little. I hope no one minds. Or maybe even someone has gone through something similar. So I told my giver last week and it went awesome. But now I find myself wondering about how things are going to go. Though we talk every day and have seen each other twice, he has seemed more distant, not as lovey, and it's harder to get him to committ to seeing each other. Our schedules don't line up well and when they do he seems more apt to make plans with friends. Which he use to invite me along to. I have brought up that he's more distant and, a little tipsy, he told me that he had a lot on his plate (ex wife issues), use to his solo routine, homesick, and that this H thing is the least of his worries. So while I feel like you really do speak the truth when slightly intoxicated, I can't help but wonder if he's pulling away. I told him he can talk to me any time... I guess what I'm most concerned about is that it seems he's not as into me as he use to be and that scares me because I really like this guy. So am I just being hypersensitive and insecure? When we are actually together its pretty normal. So ugh... I just want it to be like it was :(

Posted

I'm going through the exact same thing. I told the guy that I'm dating that I have hsv2 a few days ago and although he's been nice and understanding of it, I can still sense a distance from him that was not there before I disclosed to him. I have also noticed that it has been slightly harder to nail down plans with him as well, like last night he was suppose to come over and watch a movie with me but instead he went out and got super drunk with his friends. He did end up showing up that night but he was pretty wasted and didn't appear to be feeling well so I told him to go home and take care of himself. I totally get the feelings your feeling right now. I guess we just both have to wait it out a bit and see if they're able to Handel the news or if they're gonna eventually leave because they can't Handel it. I really wish you the best of luck and I hope everything works out with your guy, if it doesn't it's not you're fault. We didn't do anything wrong. We were honest now the ball is in their court.

Posted

We seriously are in the same situation! I want to give him time, but at the same time it's hard for me too, you know? I don't wanna rush him but I'd like to

Posted

Yeah I know. Men need more time than women sometimes to process things so it's important that we give them the time they need. Being too pushy too talk about things can end up pushing them away. They'll come Round when they're ready. Xo

Posted

Hey ladies, just want to jump in and say give them time. It's so easy to make assumptions about what someone might be thinking or feeling, but we never really can know. I know it's probably very difficult not really knowing where they stand, but try to stay positive. Focus on the goods and not the bads, stay optimistic, and don't let doubt creep in... they'll come around.

Posted

I told one guy and he FREAKED for a whole month ... it was before I learned of asymptomatic shedding (I actually learned from him which sent ME on a freak-out!) and I had had sex with him once with a condom (believing that was "safe" as I wasn't having an OB :( ) . After he got educated (his Dr schooled him about not asking about STD's before jumping in the sack...lol) he came back and we had 3 yrs together before I realized he just wasn't what *I* wanted in the long run...so give them time to process it their way ;)

 

This caught my eye:

 

I guess what I'm most concerned about is that it seems he's not as into me as he use to be

 

Well, it may be that he's processing it. And it may be that you are right. Remember, Herpes makes GREAT Wingman .... and will often show you the difference between the guy who wants to get INTO you and the guy who wants to get into YOU ;)

 

http://supporttruthanddialog.com/using-herpes-as-your-wingman/

 

http://herpeslife.com/herpes-forum/discussion/3309/successful-herpes-disclosure-but-not-for-the-reasons-you-might-think

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