drs. appts. and finding a new obgyn

[golddust086]

I had told myself that I was going to try and get on as often as possible, but this weather has been kicking my butt. I had a cold and an "almost outbreak," but I nipped it in the bud before anything could come up. I applied some Z creme to the affected area and within a few days it was all clear and I was back to normal, but I consulted my doctor about it and he confirmed that my hives are not herpes related, but an allergic reaction. To what, well, that remains a mystery.

I am currently looking for a new obgyn because I feel like the doctor I am seeing doesn't take anyone seriously who doesn't have a medical degree....and I'm not just saying that, he told me that...I know! I try to talk to him about herpes and he nonchalantly says, "so many people have it.... we are not even going to worry or look into it just because your pregnant." I felt like it just didn't matter to him that I was concerned because I thought maybe I had an o.b. He was quite rude. So, I'll be requesting a new dr. to see me from now on. He also said that most physicians don't care about what type you have because herpes is herpes and it doesn't matter where it is. Does anyone agree with this? I wish that I felt that way honestly, but even when I said I had it, the practitioner put on gloves...lol. So, I guess it's hard for me to ignore it because people are so freaked out about it.

I have been recovering from my sickness and taking serious advantage of being pregnant and enjoying it:) In a few weeks I should know the sex of the baby. Are there any specific questions I should ask my new doctor regarding hsv and being pregnant? Everyone I've spoken to says I just shouldn't say anything and that confuses me because it just doesn't make sense not to tell my obgyn.

[WCSDancer2010]

Well, to be honest, to most Dr's, Herpes really isn't a big deal and most just plain can't understand why people react so strongly to a positive diagnosis .. and so many need some empathy training around H diagnosis.And he is right - most Dr's don't understand that it DOES matter which one you have .. I just read something with Dr Peter Leone and he is working with others to get the CDC to see this ... which is a step because once the CDC embraces it, it will trickle down to the medical community. And honey, any Dr who is handling your junk will wear gloves ... if they don't, get another Dr. That's standard protocol for handling any area that has bodily fluids :)

 

You definitely want to learn what the Dr's protocol regarding the delivery is with HSV.... given you received this so close to the time you got pregnant, you will be at a slightly higher risk (because you are still developing antibodies so your chance of an OB right before delivery is higher) so they *should* say they will monitor you closely, likely put you on anti-virals for the last month, and they will check everything out (inside and out) thoroughly when you go into labor (I think they have some device to help them see any micro-lesions) .. and if there is a concern, you will likely be advised to have a cesaerean ... so definitely talk to them and make sure YOU are comfortable with the people who are likely to be with you during delivery. If you can afford it, you may want to look into getting a Doula (birth coach) to be your advocate in the delivery room as well....

 

(((HUGS)))

[MMissouri]

I do agree that herpes is herpes. I think from an ob/gyn perspective they are not going to be concerned with anything until it's almost time for you to deliver. (Then they will put you on antivirals and probably look at you with a special light before delivery.) As for the gloves, isn't that a normal practice? Unless he put them on just to talk to you, I wouldn't take offense to that. I put them on way before I touch a patient and I'm not thinking about herpes. You definitely NEED to tell your next ob/gyn! They need to know to look for outbreaks before delivery, and you need the antivirals before that point also. The only thing I can say about your current Ob/gyn is he needs to work on his bedside manner. Good luck with the new one!

[WCSDancer2010]

@MMissouri..

 

The point of "herpes is herpes" mattering (because the two types DO behave a little differently) is two fold:

 

1) You know your risks .. HSV1 genitally sheds a LOT less than HSV2 (to the point that the experts are now saying that the risk of transmission is almost nil. because they don't seem to be getting any reports of H1 being passed through genital sex ... only oral sex) .... it will affect whether you choose to go on antivirals, use condoms, etc depending on your partners comfort with those risks. Even the CDC is coming around to distinguishing between the two and giving out more info on the info/stats of the two types with regard to location...

 

2) If you have genital HSV1 and your partner has cold sores, your risks are even smaller ... but if you have H2 and they have cold sores, you would still want to take reasonable precautions ;)

 

Even for having the baby, it matters. She's more likely to have an OB near delivery with H2 than H1... and I may be wrong but I think H2 is harder on infants if they get it...

 

So really "Herpes isn't Herpes" ... It DOES help to know which one you have... ;)

 

(((HUGS)))

[MMissouri]

I didn't state that in the way I wanted it to come across. I get to a patient it matters and why that is. I meant from a clinical perspective, they do state herpes is herpes. Meaning that it's essentially the same virus it just lands in a different part of the spinal column (near the ear versus the lower spine). I know that it's more in depth than that. Hopefully that clarifies what I meant to say! (I don't disagree with you, I was just trying to reply to her doctors stand on the subject.) This is one instance where shorter is not necessarily better. And I realize that I'm probably coming across as confusing and conflicted! It's sometimes hard to disassociate from what I've learned (and how outdated that may be) with how I feel.

[WCSDancer2010]

It's all good - just wanted to clarify for any readers out there :)

[golddust086]

What I mean with the whole gloves thing, just to clarify, my obgyn came in with another physician (a female to observe..my obgyn is a male dr.) and this woman was not even going to touch me but as soon as I told my dr. I have HSV2, that lady reached over the counter for gloves and just smacked them on. And she didn't even come close to me. She looked at me as if I had aids...but I'm sure it didn't help that my dr. mistakenly called HSV, HIV but then quickly corrected himself... I know that they have to wear gloves...any doctor does at certain times...I just thought she was a little ridiculous by her reaction, I mean, c'mon...I wanted to jokingly touch her.

I did find another doctor to see me because yes I understand that doctors do sometimes feel that herpes is just a skin condition, but it's also something that falls under the category of an STD so it is conflicting for someone who actually has it (me) and who possibly just had an outbreak. I have been doing my best to research and really try to prevent anything that stresses me out, but just the thought of my child having to feel pain at birth is just horrifying and I want to make sure I continue to become more educated on this and just be self aware of how I need to handle outbreaks and be informed and not so close minded on hsv, but not to open about it because like I said, it's a part of me and that's all.

I do understand that perspective that herpes is just herpes, it's more common than people think. But do I agree with that? Ehhh, I just "understand" that perspective. I don't agree that herpes is just herpes. It doesn't change the fact that education is still key here. My doctor just disregarded my concern as if it was nothing. He said that so many people have it, so it's not a big deal. I found that very offensive because if it wasn't such a big deal we would be able to talk about it with out embarrassment or shame or having someone reach over and put on gloves as if you're a disease. We would be able to talk about it in a mature manner with key points of tackling the issue on herpes and figure out a way to help people who have it or facing challenges of understanding it.

He also told me that my chances of having any outbreak during pregnancy were very slim so he just wasn't concerned. This doctor must have had FIND A NEW DOCTOR in invisible ink on his forehead or something... It made me laugh that just because you have a degree in a certain field doesn't mean you have the answers to everything. Especially something like HSV which is so controversial and not really understood yet. It's not understood by doctors or the CDC or people who have it, people who don't have it.... it is very complicating.

I am pregnant and I have HSV2...and it matters. I want to know what my options are. I would like to feel that I am in good hands and not just someone you are trying milk for money because you have a little certificate that says you can parade around like a jackass in a white coat. I am not saying all doctors are like that, but this doctor was and I can imagine him discussing herpes or anything related to it with other people and saying, "IT'S NO BIG DEAL." I am not going to suffer because this guy is an idiot.

[MMissouri]

I agree, I'm glad you found another doctor. I hope that this one has a better bedside manner and is more informative! Too funny @ the gloves. You should have touched her haha. Could you imagine what her response would have been?! So funny, but yet sad at the same time.

[WCSDancer2010]

One thing I would say to any woman who is pregnant is that you HAVE to be comfortable with your Dr and the people who may attend your birth ... so I'm glad you found a new Dr. Believe me, I get you!

 

When I was pregnant with my first child (newarly 30 years ago ....ackkk!) my first Dr scared me into going straight to having a Cesaerean and witout the internet, it was hard to get anything useful to get educated. I did a lot of research after I had her, found out I DIDN'T need to have had it, AND that I *could* have a VBAC (vaginal birth after cesaerean)... when I got pregnant again, they went me back to him (I lived in the UK so you get assigned a Dr) and he was determined to do another Cesaerean. I had to basically pitch a long-assed fit at my regular Dr to get her to help me to find a new Dr to deliver my daughter.... and the new guy took one look at my very womanly "breeders hips" and said "Shame a strapping great lass like you having a Cesaerean first time around!" ... I had my second daughter naturally ... despite having H AND a Cesaerean :)

 

At least now, even though Google has a LOT of crap out there, a smart person can find the info they need and then present it to a Dr and discuss it with them. Many Dr's may not like that but as you said, they DON'T (and honestly CAN'T) know it all nowadays because there just plain is soooo much new information coming out every single day on everything out there. So we have to be our own advocates...

 

Again... you may want to look into getting a Doula ... because when you go into labor you get whatever Dr is on call ... so if you want an advocate standing by and helping you to stick with your birth plan, this may be an option you may want to look at ;)

 

(((HUGS)))