Jump to content
  • Want to be a part of a supportive community? Join the H Opp community for free.

    Welcome to the Herpes Opportunity Support Forum! We are a supportive and positive group to help you discover and live your Opportunity. Together, we can shed the shame and embrace vulnerability and true connection. Because who you are is more important than what you have. Get your free e-book and handouts here: https://www.herpesopportunity.com/lp/ebook

Unintentional herpes talk success?

Recommended Posts

So, I posted not that long ago about how my first disclosure was a bit of a disaster, and since then have had an unexpected, unplanned, and completely random series of events. So I deleted my online dating profile because I was ready to break from that scene. Right before I deleted it though I had started talking to someone and we exchanged numbers.


We met, things seemed to go well, and we continued to talk. One night we were talking and I made a comment about condoms and being safe (Looking back I totally set myself up for it) He was like well I'm STD free so no worries, do you have anything? Inside I freaked out. I can't say no to that question, but I was so not ready to spill. We had met once for God's sake! I beat around the bush for a second before I decided what the hell, might as well get it over with, and i just flat out said it. He was surprised. He stopped talking. We said goodbye and went about our lives. A few days later I texted him to see if our plans for our next meeting were cancelled. He said no, and we started talking again. He asked some questions, I answered as best as i could, and its been pretty normal ever since.


We've met again since our chat about my herpes status (its semi long distance), and to my surprise he totally wanted to kiss me. He wanted to hold my hand. I thought our meeting would be more of a Let's be friends because I think you're cool kind of deal, but it wasn't.


It really just goes to show that when you least expect it, and when you stop trying, something good can happen! I'm not saying that me and this guy are going run off into the sunset and fall deeply in love, I'm totally OK if that doesn't happen. It just gave me such a confidence boost after my last experience disclosing! Last time it was planned, I was prepared. This time it was (I thought) a total disaster that ended up working itself out somehow. Now I'm just excited to see where this goes, and it feels so good not to have my dirty little secret holding me back!

Link to comment

I personally find that complete honesty and being able to be vulnerable will show you a LOT about who the person is ... and sure, *some* will go the other way. The ones that run, well, who wants them anyway? The ones who CHOOSE to not have a relationship, well, I respect their right to make that choice. And the ones who stay??? Well, I call them Keepers ... whether they work out or not, they are really good guys who I at least know will stand by me if something worse happens to me ... so they are worth continuing to explore where the relationship may go ;)


Glad you had this experience .... remember it if you ever come up against a runner in the future :)



Link to comment

Thank you for the support! I'm excited to see where it ends up, too! it's so true what wcsdancer said, some will run for the hills, others will consider it and choose not to pursue a relationship, others will be accepting and understanding. It's the luck of the draw I guess, but a great learning experience!

Link to comment

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
  • Create New...