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Herpes jabs not so funny


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So I know we have all posted something about those pesky Herpes jokes and the insensitivity and ignorance they convey. Well I've survived all the puns from favorite movies and tv shows until last night. I love the show Two Broke Girls and last night the show's whole episode was devoted to one of the girls thinking she had herpes. Now today I kinda looked back and kinda laughed because I remember being the way Caroline was when I was diagnosed. I also showed pics of my va jay jay to my best friend lol It was crazy. We made our jokes. Until my fears where confirmed. And now I do have H. I cried the entire time watching this show. My mom was trying to calm me down she said don't take it so bad. You know it's a show and maybe they are trying to bring awareness about it, they even said it there 1 in 6 people have herpes." I just shook my head. I know my mom was trying to get me not to feel bad in her own way and she has been there but it just wasn't funny. I went to bed crying. I think more cuz I thought of the person I believe gave me H. Maybe he is unaware and uneducated. Maybe he is fully aware and in denial (i truly think this is it). Either way he discarded me like a used condom. And the jokes and the whole episode on tv last night just brought those feelings back up.

 

I woke up today felt much better after I cried. And it's a new day. It always helps to come here and read what people are posting and get support. I know I am not alone. I've come so far from the day I was diagnosed and just wanted to die. I have made it 7 months now and I'm still her. Still alive and kicking and enjoying life. There are people who want me and love me. I guess I just wish I could shout it from the rooftops and be open about H. I wish Hollywood...the world at large would just see this virus for what it is a skin condition and be more loving and compassionate. Last night was just not so funny.

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Itook have had H for 7 months now and some change but iknow what you mean about the jokes. Ipersonally laugh at them now because it doesn't phase me. Yes ihave it but its just a joke. My bf contacted it from me and jokes slip from his mouth because he forgets he have it too and it bothers him when jokes are made. I'm sorry that you feel that way about it but ipromise you its just a joke and people who don't have it don't understand just remember to love yourself is all you can do

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Big hug to you Domh..it sucks when you feel like that but you not only cried with the show - you laughed with it too! It just triggered off stuff for you to heal. Your ex discarding you is what made you cry...the show was just a trigger to show you what you need to heal...and crying is a great release. Next time a joke causes some pain...just go with it like you did and release it. Its teaching you what you need to heal.

People love you and will continue to love you...Herpes isn't going to stop that. And believe me...its a great insurance policy to avoid guys like your ex! Having it can make you more courageous and vulnerable, more aware of the goodness in a man and give you the conviction not to settle for less.

So yes its a new day and smile through it...Herpes is only a small part of who you are :-) xx

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Lelani's right. The triggers are opportunities to heal that self-judgment in yourself! Think about it: If you were already okay and accepting of that part of yourself, you wouldn't be triggered. These kind of "ouch, that hurts" reactions are breadcrumbs pointing to more opportunities for wholeness within ourselves, opportunities to give ourselves the acceptance we deserve. The crying is e-motion ("energy in motion") that is allowing you to move into a deeper and deeper acceptance. (I wish I could cry more; over the years, I have developed a mechanism where my crying doesn't come naturally when I'm sad.)

 

The sweet spot here is to simultaneously allow ourselves to feel sad (or whatever other genuine emotion we're feeling) without judgment or pity. That's when sadness is healing and beneficial. If we're crying and feeling like we shouldn't be or something is "wrong," then we're just re-opening the same wound and hurting ourselves. Be kind to yourself and allow yourself to feel, even when you're triggered by anything out there in the world that reminds you of something you're ashamed of.

 

And the fact that you woke up the next day feeling better fits perfectly. You allowed what needed to move in you emotionally to move. That clears the plate for you to live your life right now fully. I'm glad you're still here. So much love to you!

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Thank you sayyywhatt, leilani and Adrial!! I am feeling so much better. I am allowing myself to feel what I feel and I move on from there. I have taken the opportunity to go to therapy and I love my therapist. I told her about my Herpes and she disclosed she had HPV. It was an amazing bonding moment. She is so awesome. I feel the healing so much right now. Thank you guys for reminding me life is still good!! xoxo

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