whitedaisies

@danasaaaaaar Do u have frequent outbreaks or just nerve issues? Most of my post herpetic neuralgia stopped around 11 to 12 months. Now I just get frequent ob and don't seem to have the lingering nerve issues. If I can improve I think you will too. Chin up. Be sad and then fight back!!! I go through periods of extreme sadness too but I am fighting to regain my life back and working really hard. Haven't given up on sex even though I kick and scream about it. I refuse to let this virus take everything away I want. Not ending it with fwb. I am good in the sack....he benefits so why shouldn't i. I will have an outbreak after and that's just what it is. You will get back to a better place. Try maybe new meds as 2lefit2quit suggests. And go to therapy as it really helps to have someone listen. Today is a good day for me. I am having more good days than bad. It's taken long but I am here. I am sending u a big virtual hug!!

I think it's great u are going into therapy. I am at two days a week for a year. I agree I have accepted herpes and I know enough about it if I had a few ob I could deal. But this is slow torture. I have a fwb now and it's exhausting trying to figure out when to have sex etc. I am almost ready to end it because the stress of it all is just too much. I have very frequent ob and prodome The pain will go away. It will. It took me about 11 months. The prodomes and stuff I dunno. I have developed a 5 year plan for myself. Saying to myself I can handle this for 5 years. I am giving my body 5 years to get this shit under control. I am in 1.5 and hoping the next 3.5 my body will learn to handle it and I will be able to emotionally deal. We need to develop coping mechanisms to help us. My advice is don't look too far ahead about relationships etc. take each day as it comes. I really feel for you. Of course suicide isn't an answer but I totally get the negative thoughts. I have them myself. But hope of a better day keeps me going. And I know you will get there too

I haven't taken anything yet Was in famvir still having lots of breakthrough symptoms even on suppression at ob dosage. This week switchs to acyclovir. I suspect the same will happen. I have to get off meds soon to swab all these stupid bumps I am getting. Once I do that will go back on acyclovir. Nothing's working really. Breakthru symptoms. High frequency of recurrence likely 3 or 4 times daily of prodome 1.5 years after primary Am gonna try for one last romp in the sack with my fwb and then I really don't know what to do. It's hard to beat the depressions when ob and symptoms are frequent. Really wish there would be some hope out there with sthng.

Only anonymous testing at our sti clinics is hiv testing. Everything else fair game.

Now need referral in Ontario for anything beside gp. Could go to sti clinic but going to derm in 2 weeks lucked out on appy

In Canada u need referrals. It's ridiculous and then u have to wait to get an appy usually 3 months minimum I know I know health care lol

Going tomorrow

I go from thinking they are warts to they are not. THey are mostly gone now barely a tiny little bump. I did pick at it which is gross but I was trying to see if fluid from h and then I was trying to see if there is an ingrown hair. Man vaginas are so hard....I can barely see what's going on down there. Not to mention I am in my 40s and I can't see far or close now....and it just felt hard bump. I don't think I could pick a wart off, could I? OBGYN called today...she said I need another referral from my GP which means its the universe telling me not to bother going. There's hardly anything to show anyway. I don't think genital warts would cause a prodome on both sides of my groin and then have sharp stabbing electric shock pain....could warts have come up the same time as h prodome? Maybe? Very unlikely it would show itself after 1.5 years...unless I got it from oral with the guy shedding the virus but fuck I can't be that unlucky could I? Anyway with HPV so hard to tell b/c hardly anyone knows they have it so I don't blame anyone it would just be really unlucky and I can't be the most unlucky could I? What do you mean, which antiviral gave you those symptoms and what were they and how could you tell they were not h? @Danaaaaaasaur

I don't think they are warts. If anything foliculitis or h. Great now in a new place. Ne'er ever had any on vagina or groin mostly bum thighs and tailbone. It's extra sad now it's near my privates. Oh well.

@elle789 What r ur symptoms like now.

I have tried them all already. @elle789 I took valtrex at beginning and it took a bit of burning away at double required dosage but ob still happening. Then I was off a while bc had to do the western blot blood test. Then I started famvir bc I thought hey if I have defied all logic this far why would te meds that every one else take work on me? Famvir works on 5% of cases better than valtrex I believe. It reduces symptoms I and the I ration is shorter but still constant ob. I have heard that hsv1 doesn't respond to antivirals as well as hsv2. Yay! I tried acyclivir for about 2 weeks a few months back and I just panicked and switched back to famvir. I am so happy valtrex worked for u though. Yay! Happy dance!! When I am a little settled with not too many symptoms I have to go off again. I have pcr swabs at home and gonna start swabbing again to make sure what I think are ob actually are bc I don't get typical lesions just tiny little bug bites that show up on tailbone bum back thighs. I am trying to figure out of these are h or an overreaction of my immune system. May then try acyclivir after that and valtrex again. I don't have a dr that is helping me thru this. I am pretty much experimenting myself. No dr I have been with has cared much about hav1 b everyone has it. And no one believes my symptoms except my therapist. Easiest thing for dr to do when they can't put u into a herpes box is to say it's all in ur head. Herpes isn't constant ob....it come and goes. I wish I had a $1 for every time someone said that. Anyway I have mustered up courage to go see an obgyn again. We will see if I follow thru. Maybe one day the antivirals will work. I personally think there is some genetic component to having herpes that dictates how severe u get it. I hae no underlying health issues and have a pretty good immune system. I do hve eczema which I believe caused te spread of virus bc my entire body would sometimes itch head to toe. Blah blah Your story did give me hope though that one day sthng may work. Xo Btw did u hve a relationship during those 2 years and did u pass it on?

Oh I see. I am so happy you lived through such a difficult infection!!

That's not brain herpes!!! Isn't meningitis an overreaction of the immune system when confronting a virus or bacteria? Brain herpes would be lesions in ur actual brain....

God please don't tell me there is brain herpes. I can't watch te video. I thought people could just get meningitis from herpes. Shit! With h I got chronic fatigue/post viral syndrome and lots of weird symptoms confusion and lack of memory as well as I get an earthquake feelig in my body when I awake from sleep. Ugh.

@fitgirl I know u had frequent ob but I would say I get mine monthly if not more frequent. There is really never a period of nothing. Trust me if I had no sensations I would jam pack all the sex I could!!!! Ob after sex I know are from friction I don't worry about those. I don't like them but I don't worry. Yes time I guess is the answer because there is no other unfortunately. I am trying to live my life progress forward. Hard when symptoms are frequent. Anyway not much to say....I gess I vented. Changes nothing but cathartic nonetheless.

@fitgirl I appreciate ur words I just have ob repetitively. I feel emotionally stronger then another ob or prodome comes. Thank the good lord I don't get typical lesions I honestly would have I I no what. Really the feeling of hopelessness gets overwhelming when I am doing everything I can to stop them. Maybe it's time to find a ghsv1 partner. Too much pressure for me with my negative one. I dunno. When u have ob every 3 months were u with a h- person? I don't think they are warts btw but they could be. I will have to wait for my appt.

I know there's nothing to say. I am just very unlucky with this virus. It makes my journey so much harder. Loving the hugs!

Bbith time sex w condoms

Special hugs to you ladies!!!!!

Sex once 2 months ago Last sexual experience before that 1.5 years ago Oral only last August and November : (

I thought I remember you saying u had them. Could I got this from my new partner we had sex once or have I been carrying it since a year and a half ago? Anyway I don't know if they are warts. I have picked at them to see I have no idea so I don't know if drs will know as they look different not. I thought it may be h and I wanted to swab it as I have swabs at home. I am tired of all this. Is sex worth this much stress!? Now do u disclose you get warts to your future partners? I know I am getting ahead of myself but I am just so tired of all this. I want my body back!!!!

Maybe it's just a blocked pore from folliculitis. It doesn't look like a wart. But who knows. It's hard. I think warts are more fleshy. Ah well. Booked appt with obgyn. If it isn't a wart it should go away in it's own I guess. If it is I will have to burn it off. I will wait I guess it's not on my genitals just on pubic hair region where crease is between leg and pubic area just am inch away from that. I hate that I sound crazy but nonetheless there are bumps. They are not herpes I know that for sure. Ok just googled. Could be a wart could be nothing. I have picked at it to see f it had fluid so now I am afraid I go get checked they won't know bc it looks different. Sigh

Thank u @danaaaaaasaur Now I look at my pubic area bc I have been havig burning between my hip/thigh and vagina meet. I look and one hard bump appears and a tiny hard bump beside. No fluid inside. No colour really same as skin colour. I tried to trim the hairs see f it's a blocked pore or folliculitis but so hard to tell. Could this r a genital wart? Are you fuxking kidding me? It's round and hard not fleshy and all and doesn't stick out much but u can feel it when putting finger across it. If this is a genital wart you will see me totally lose it. Are their prodomes with them? Maybe it's just a coincidence. I

My skin does not irritate at all. It's my nerves. God my damn nerves. Either burning or electric shock pain or itchiness or numbness. It's insanity. I can't believe most people get cold sores once a year and I am such a small percentage. Had to cancel sexy time today. I don't even know why this guy is with me. He might as well be celibate. I hate whining but honestly this fuckig sucks and I can't try hard to improve these symptoms. I hve no control over them. They come and go at their will despite anything I do. Iv likely won't help. It just gets meds to areas quicker and more evenly. Maybe u nee to up ur dosage. I am on 3 pills a day for 3 months and it shortens ob or prodome but doesn't prevent them. I can't even be the lucky person who gets better on meds. How unlucky can one be? All because I had oral sex and it was a horrible damn experience anyway. Bah. Somebody has got to one up with something to kill this bullshit!!! I have had 3 children vaginally with no issues. And hsv1 knocks me on my ass for a year and a half and likely more? God haven forbid I get a bad illness. I am petrified! No matter how much personal work you do this physical bullshit is still there. Yes I can control how I react to the bullshit but it gets exhausting when it's all the time. Anyway what's the point?

@ihaveittoo1975 I am still struggling 1.5 years later. I can empathize with you.