whitedaisies

That's what I also said. Haven't got one yet $2000 later

It could be both for you too like it is for me. Autoimmune and hsv1. These bumps and lesions could be h and could also be an overreaction from the actual virus. It will be really hard to tell. I would strongly suggest a rhumatologist I know you think its hsv1 BUT there is a reason why your body can't control it and it could be autoimmune. I didn't think I had one either til I started putting things together after a while. Anyway Hang in. Take steps to help you prove and disprove to help you figure it out.

I know when my daughters bad hives from viruses when they were little, they always got worse after sweating or heat. Try to limit her physical activity for a while and keep her cool til she can Shake it. It may help

All these experts and Dr work on probabilities and likelihoods and whether your body responds to meds to help them formalize an opinion. It's what they do. Absence of a positive swab it is what it is. It sucks when we are in the small minority bc we feel we are not heard or getting the right treatment. I know the feeling of frustration. At times I think it prevents experts or Dr from getting a whole approach about the virus...maybe skewing their ideas of probability. Best you can do is advocate for yourself. You can't convince someone who doesn't want to be convinced. And just be persistent and move forward. Good luck Higs

I am here to tell you that it does get better. Sometimes we get to a dark place and we are there longer than we would like. It's been a year and a half for me and I am just starting to feel feelings of happiness. But I have been depressed so long happiness is kind of scary too for me. Keep taking your meds and going to therapy. It will pay off. It just takes time. Work on your issues. As you gain an understanding of yourself, your world will become clearer and easier to live in. I got h and maybe an autoimmune disease as well and lots of other issues. The term I use is I feel like I am lugging a cement block around. This block represented my issues and suffering. It was enormous when I started. But through therapy I chipped away at it slowly. Some parts of the cement block fell off and so its lighter for me to carry now. I am hoping to keep chipping away at it through therapy to get it as light as possible. As you do that, you will make choices that reflect you and what you need and want and make and this will bring you happiness If you go back and read my posts I was a disaster. Suicidal thoughts and lots of issues. I can honestly say I am feeling happier now. I have a new friend in my life that brings me joy and I am tryig to embrace that. I am hopeful for you. You just can't give up and keep working on things. I was in an emotionally abusive relationship when I got h. It takes a lot of work to reword your brains thoughts. Keep going. Make a promise to yourself that you won't give up. Hugs and love!!!

I don't know of anyone in particular no. Is it possible for her to go off most drugs to see if sthng she is still taking is a trigger. Have any Dr recommended that? I am learning as I go of who and when to see certain doctors. I don't have much more luck than you. If a doctor is nice and caring imo stick with Her. Compassion of a medical profession goes a long way in treatment. If it's new territory for her that's fine....perhaps suggest if she recommends anyone else. Sometimes when I would see specialists they would know of other specialists and referred me to those. Your wife may have a few things going on which makes it hard to tell what's related to what and what's unrelated which really helps in diagnosis and proper medical treatment. It's difficult for any professional really. Best you can do is focus on her general mental and physical health. Sometimes things settle down a bit when we get on the right path there. In the meantime, be patient a bit. If it's decreasing that's a good sign. Keep in touch with your doctor and monitor your symptoms. Sometimes before we know it it turns the corner. It did for me. So I am hoping the same for you Xo

I understand ur frustration. I am kind of in the same situation. You are doing everything you can do. And supporting her in the process. Really wonderful of you. It can be caused by hsv yes or drugs. Hard to tell. Sounds drug related to me. I went to see a therapist to help me deal with the not knowing part. It can be quite stressful when u are going Dr to dr. Perhaps you and your wife can try that while you go through this too. It's really an exhausting process But all I can say is hang in there. Xo

I had a really horrific first time disclosure. It really couldn't have gone any worse. Seriously, I will spare you the details. But I did lots of personal work through therapy and focusing on my physical health wtc and had lots of support from a few close friends. I have had 2 positive disclosures in the last 6 months. If your disclosure went poorly, the next ones can go very well. Work on yourself and eventually imo I got better at picking who to disclose to. Good luck!! Xo

Turns out I don't think its EM. I actually think I may have an autoimmune disease that was triggered by a new hsv1 infection. I believe the autoimmune disease causes rashes or bumps for me along with nerve pain and itchiness which mimics herpes All my swabs have been negative to date but I have positive hsv1 via blood test with no proof of seroconversion. So I will never really know. I am focusing on my overall physical and mental health for 1.5 years since sympyoms started and although fatigue is there a lot... Fibromayalgia is lessening quite a bit and the frequency of either h or the autoimmune rash is decreasing. Hoping I am on the road to recovery and nothing else triggers another flare. I wish you and your wife well. Take each day as it comes...look no further and one day you will wake up and be thankful it's over. Xo

Both my disclosures were full of "word vomit". Lol @wcsdancer2010

Well if you really want to know if it's herpes or not. You can ask planned parenthood to swab or call westover heights clinic and become a patient of theirs and they will mail you swabs and you can swab whatever you want yourself and mail tem back for them to test. Then you will know. So many things can cause your symptoms. Auto immune issues, staph, strep, yeast, vulvodynia, Mrsa, bacterial vaginitis. You are going to all the doctors I did too. I have been having similar issues. A rhumatologist is a good bet to check for autoimmune problems. Also a vulva specialist is a good place to go. But my advice is to swab yourself so you can rule out hwrpes.

Ok will do Having some health issues myself this last week. A little slow getting things together. I will add everyone and then will PM you with the some info I need. Hugs

Yup. I will do so Just putting together a post and some back up info I need. Will definitely get u guys on the list. Look for a post from me soon.

Sometimes the closure you need is with yourself and has nothing to do with someone else. Just a thought.

No problem Just don't act in haste, act in your truth Going to bed now. You can PM me anytime Hugs

Be patient and kind to yourself This is new and I was an absolute disaster It's easier for someone else to see it bc they aren't emotionally attached. When it's your emotions and I bet you've never had this situation before ever happen to you....it's new and u need to navigate through this with help of a therapist. I had one amazing guy friend...still here 1.5 years later. I told him everything all my fears all my sadness. And he's still around. Weed through your friends my dear. Not all are worthy of your heart and your sadness. You will get stronger. Lots of issues to work through as did I. Knock them down one at a time. But surround yourself with support now as that is what you need. Xo

Been where u are almost exactly It gets better stop playing games with yourself and with him. I did them all. I felt all the things you do. I don't know this man you speak of and got situation. You need to take each hour and day as it comes getting stronger yourself. Therapy is a good option. It took me a whole year of therapy to try to separate the thoughts of my guy every time I had an ob or felt depressed etc. I am a lot better at it now. I still wonder sometimes we all do but you have to set up rules for yourself. What things are healthy for you and what aren't. You seem to be really unhealthy linked to this guy. Been there done that. Trust me it's not worth all the energy you are putting in it. Focus on you. This guy won't make getting hwrpes any easier. He could be a great guy I dunno ur exact situation but ur reaction is gettong destructive Imo and I mean that with love and empathy because I was there Hugs

Hang in there You certainly can ask for stronger pain meds and I wouldn't take anything yourself without consulting doctor or pharmacist For the sores try to keep them dry Try going pee in the shower as that seems to help some Also the key is to try to dry out the sores. Taking Epsom salt baths can dry them out and sometimes people blow dry on cool the area to make sure it's thoroughly dry Don't wear undies for a bit to keep air circulating down there If you search here on the forum there are lots of suggestions. Try these for now. Antivirals can take 2 or 3 days to work Chin up all outbreaks end and this will too and they do get easier in time. Good luck Hugs

I backslide too sometimes. Progress isn't all forward moving like we like it to be. Through the process we hopefully have more forward steps than backward. First u have to separate ur thoughts from ur giver. I know it's hard. I do it sometimes but u need that separation of depression and him. Stop stalking his posts. Great u are seeing a psychiatrist. Maybe u need meds for the short term and therapy is good. I have done both and still continuing therapy. Generally it does and will get better. Let yourself be sad if you need but not destructively sad. Sadness sometimes brings good things too like friendly support and love from people you care about. I do little things to make me feel better. I have my fave Starbucks drink when I am bummed or I put make up and and get dressed nice. Sometimes little things help. Good luck and hugs

Awesome!!!!!

It's been 2.5 weeks that it's been there. I am passed the 48 hour window. I think I just want him to pop it and be done with it. I am gonna try oragel next time though

Read your post Herpes shook up my family and friends too. Lost a lot of relationships or many became very strained. A friend of mine listened to me talk about my vagina about an hour a day for 6 months lol. He's the only one that has really been there for me. Everyone else really hasn't. They were either afraid or didn't understand or my guy took the easy way out and I let him. My advice is if you are finding you don't have a lot of support as I didnt, is to use this forum and also go to therapy. If you can find a good therapist, they will provide you with the support you need as you start coming to terms with your diagnosis and find new wonderful friends. I wish you well. It definitely is workable especially worth so many people having hsv1. There is a link Dancer sent me when I was really low. It described people in your life as leaves (blowing in the wind and offers no stability), branches (some strong and some weak...u need to know which is which) and some roots (the ones that allow you to live). I use that when I get down on who left. Leaves come and go and change with season. Let them go. Branches have potential and roots are keepers. Keep looking for your roots. I am. Hugs

Really happy for you. I love the title of your post!!!! Maybe you can give us details on how far along into your relationship that you disclosed.

So I think I get mine on the inside lower vaginal opening. I have had this one for almost two weeks. Keeping that area from being dry and moist is impossible. It doesn't hurt sometimes it's irritated but rare. I am almost tempted to go to doc to have him take the fluid out. How do you dry out stuff on the inside areas that are constantly moist. Going commando will not help. Already tried a million baths with Epsom salt and lavender oil. It's still there. Suggestions?

I am sorry it didn't work for you but it's good you tried something. See if they will put u on a higher dosage of vaulters for a month or two and then wean back down....maybe that will make a difference. I did better with burning pain on the higher dose. Good luck