dilemmagirl

Hi Lara..I am having the same issue now..I think I am having outbreaks like every week..I'm not sick or whatever..but maybe I am stressed with a lot of things..plus being away from my family (never been this far from them -- they are a 16-hour flight away). Plus I noticed that the more I think about it..the more it really becomes an outbreak..I am experiencing it while I am saying it now..it is really hard..but I also have days when I am so so so happy so when I get really lonely because of having H, I remind myself that I will be happy again..that it is just a fleeting feeling..I am reading and replying to posts everyday..it makes me realize that I am not alone in this journey..that there is someone else experiencing the same thing..feeling the same thing as I am..reminds me that I am human instead of just a herpes victim.. :)

I was too shaken up to complain..all I wanted back then was to get out of there and buy the medicines..find new friends who will accept you & H :)

I think everything is wrong :( ever since I got H..I just think that everything I feel, example a little itch..a little tummy ache..headache..colds..are all connected to me having H :( I am going nuts! I mean there is always something that I feel physically and I think it's H..when I got my 2nd outbreak back in December, I was shattered to pieces..I didn't feel anything for 18 months and then it happened again..I felt itchy all the time after that..I told my doctor there's a vesicle there..she kept on looking but there was nothing..although she didn't order a blood test anymore..she said if I don't stop acting like that (I'm like in her clinic every week and I text her) she will refer me to a psychiatrist for counseling! Well, here I am miles away from home and my family..feeling itchy all the time..sometimes, I think something is there but there really isn't..like today! I think there is something..touched it and it's not painful at all..the skin is not broken..but there's tingling when I am not doing anything..am I a weirdo??? :( I know I will look again later and torture myself :(

Ok..I feel tingling sensations all the time :( is it in my head? I think it is..i look and there's nothing there..

You are not alone mlss08! :( I am feeling the same way too! My hiv test came back negative but I still feel something is wrong everytime I feel something down there. I think I have to have it taken again? I am going crazy! :(

I get that too..actually I am having tingling sensations..I always have that sensation..ever since my 2nd outbreak last december..I think it is all in my head..weird because when I have my period, I don't have tingling sensations..but right after it's over, the tingling sensation is back..soooo weird!

How many number of times a year is considered "normal" to have H outbreaks? My doc said there is really no saying how many times a year I'll get it. But I just want to know other people's experiences on outbreaks.

I need someone who will slap me whenever I feel negative about this H thing. I've had it for 2 years..I didn't have an outbreak 18 months after the first one. Suddenly on Dec. 2012, I felt itchy down there and my GYN confirmed that it was an outbreak (but she didn't do any tests). Since then, every time I feel something down there..my heart pounds like it's gonna explode..my mind spins thinking all the causes possible in this world. I mean, I get really nervous and anxious. Ever since I relocated here in the US, I always feel something. My mom, who is in Asia, keeps on telling me that it is all in my head. I check it almost everyday just to make sure there's no vesicle somewhere down there. Am I going crazy? :( I try my best to see the good in this every single day. I did some extraordinary things after I got H. I moved halfway across the world to realize my dream! Maybe this hypochondriac side of mine is heightened because I am so far away from my mom and sister (I've never been this far from them). When I read the posts of other people here, I give positive advice..but when it comes to myself it is just so hard..I try..but there is this little voice inside my head telling me there is something wrong with my body :( What do I need to do? :(

Hi newlife2013..how many mg do you take? :)

Thanks here4help! I am hypochondriac to start with..it just got worse when I got the virus :( I always think that there is something wrong..I was tested for HIV and came back negative. But, I had kinda unprotected sex a few days before the test was done (but he said he tested negative..it was weird but we talked about it because he works in Singapore and his work permit was renewed because the HIV test came back negative). Anyway, I read in one website before that recurrent HSV can be a sign of HIV..this info was the only one that stuck in my head..I am going crazy! :( I sometimes wish I can go back 10 years ago..I will not even talk to any man! :(

I had sex once a few days after an outbreak and it was soooo painful that we had to stop.

Why do I always think that I have or going to have an outbreak? :(

I didn't have any outbreaks 18 months after my first one. I didn't even know then that food can cause an outbreak until a month ago. I ate the same food that I have eaten before I got HSV and didn't get an outbreak. I think it's more of thinking that you will get an outbreak after eating something and then really getting it because of stress. I think you can eat anything as long as it is in moderation. If something causes an outbreak once, I think you need to try again just to make sure that it is from eating something and not caused by something else, such as stress. :)

Really looking forward to this!!! :D

Hi Here4help! Nobody deserves to get herpes..but don't think about it that way. Think of it as simply a virus you picked up. Use this negative experience in creating a more positive one. Assess your life. What your goals are. Before I had herpes, I wasn't really working very hard toward my goal. After I got diagnosed (2 yrs ago), the experience made me look where I am at in my life..and it made me work toward my dream job and I now am realizing my dream. I also realized that it didn't really matter who gave it to me (maybe it does if you want to tell him not to give it to anyone else but aside from that it's not big of a deal). What matters is who will accept me and my herpes. You are fortunate that your boyfriend gives you the love that you deserve. He knows you are worth more than your herpes. Looks like he doesn't care as long as you are with him hun..he didn't disappear, right? Take his hand and go through this journey together :)

"Sometimes you have to let everything go -- purge yourself. If you are unhappy with anything -- whatever is bringing you down -- get rid of it. Because you will find that when you are free, your true creativity, your true self comes out." -- Tina Turner

"Problems are in your life so that you can discover potentials that you didn't even know you had." --Barry Michels

Having H doesn't make you less of a person. It doesn't make you less lovable. It should not be a reason for people not to respect you. It is a virus. When I first got mine 2 years ago, I had the same things running through my mind. But I talked to my mom, who is very supporting, and she told me that it doesn't and should not change anything about you and how you and other people should see you. My doctor said the same thing. Sometimes, I still get sad (especially if it's the time of the month), but I think of what it really is. I recently realized that it is nothing but a virus. Just like the flu, colds, chicken pox, and all the other viruses in the world. Come to think of it, it is easier to give a cold to someone (just be sneezing) than to give H out. Someone who won't or can't accept you for having H tells more about them and not you (I read this from one of the posts). My closest friends know that I have H and they don't really care. They are still my friends. We don't even talk about it. My bestfriend even forgot that I have it. She says to take the meds when I get an OB. Surround yourself with people who will love and accept what happened..it will make the world a better place to live in :) hugs to you paige >:D<

Having H doesn't make you less of a person. It doesn't make you less lovable. It should not be a reason for people not to respect you. It is a virus. When I first got mine 2 years ago, I had the same things running through my mind. But I talked to my mom, who is very supporting, and she told me that it doesn't and should not change anything about you and how you and other people should see you. My doctor said the same thing. Sometimes, I still get sad (especially if it's the time of the month), but I think of what it really is. I recently realized that it is nothing but a virus. Just like the flu, colds, chicken pox, and all the other viruses in the world. Come to think of it, it is easier to give a cold to someone (just be sneezing) than to give H out. Kaybee is correct in saying that someone who won't or can't accept you for having H tells more about them and not you. My closest friends know that I have H and they don't really care. They are still my friends. We don't even talk about it. My bestfriend even forgot that I have it. She says to take the meds when I get an OB. Surround yourself with people who will love and accept what happened..it will make the world a better place to live in :) hugs to you prettylady_92 >:D<

I would suggest you see a doctor because the medications they give for H is different if you are pregnant. I got pregnant and had my first OB at the same time. My doctor said the medications are different. For your safety (and your baby's safety too if you are pregnant, go see a doctor) :)

Thank you for the hugs..I really need that :) People ask me why am I not dating..I just.smile and say I haven't found one who is worth dating..I am still scared to let my guard down..I tell myself that it doesn't make me less lovable..but it is still scary to fall in love with someone who might not be strong enough to understand and accept what happened to me..

Your story inspires me Danielle! I've had gone out on dates but never told anyone of them. I've had unprotected sex a couple of times (I feel so bad about it). But I push them away when I feel it's getting too serious. I am afraid to tell a potential partner because I fear rejection. I don't want to grow old alone, and I am hoping and praying that when the right man comes, I will have courage to tell him.

I've had herpes for 2 years and I wasn't told that he had it. If he told me, I would still have had a relationship with him because I was so in love with him at that time. But after getting it and getting pregnant (at the same time -- the doctor said that there's a big chance I got it from my bf that time) he left. Anyway, I have had unprotected sex a couple of times after getting herpes. I was too scared to tell my partner. Maybe because I know that they weren't ready for a serious relationship and just wanted to get me in their beds. Turned out it's true. Both of them wanted to be just friends right after we had sex! I wanted to kill them but I was too afraid that I gave them herpes so I just kept my distance. I hope that one day I will meet the man who will accept me for what I am and what I have and not judge me. I am also hoping that when that time comes, I will be strong enough to tell him and be with him. I get scared everytime I feel I am having an outbreak because it reminds me of bad experiences -- getting pregnant, getting herpes, and having a miscarriage :( Everyday I try to love myself more and not blame myself for getting herpes. Well, I didn't buy it from the store, right? :)

Hello..I am 30 yrs old..single female..I had my first outbreak 2 yrs ago..I don't know who I got it from..but the doctor said it's from my bf at that time..I found out I had H2 the same day I found out I was pregnant..I was feeling the burning and itching down there for a couple of days but dismissed it as "after the deed soreness". I was so scared because I know that the virus stays in the body. My doctor didn't explain what it was and what I needed to do. She just prescribed medicines that I need to take and told me to be tested with HIV. I was with a girl friend that time and she noticed that there was something wrong when I came out of the doctor's office. I told her and she said that it's not a bad thing , that there are medicines (good thing she was with me because I was a mess that day. I changed doctors too..I found one who educated me). Anyway, I thought that it can't get any worse..when I told my bf that I was pregnant, he refused to acknowledge the baby..so I decided not to tell him that I have H..after finding out that I was pregnant, he left me and our baby. I was devastated. But it didn't stop there, I lost my baby a few weeks after..the doctor said there's a big chance it was because of H. I was shattered. I felt that it was because of me..that it was my fault that my baby died. I thought that my life was over. My mom knows that I have H. She is very supportive too. I became a scared person..I think I became a hypochondriac..I get scared (a lot) everytime I feel something down there. Maybe because of the things I read from the internet which are so scary..and puts people with H in a box. I guess that is the reason I looked for something like this. My mom is great in assuring me that I am not a lesser person. However, I feel it will be nice to talk to people who share the same experience as I have. There are a lot of questions in my mind and I cannot wait to ask you guys. :)

Hello caligirl12..if your friends can make remarks like that and make fun of people who have H, I think they are not worh your while. I mean, aren't they thinking first what they are about to say? I know we have freedom of expression nowadays..but I believe that we need to express it in a kind and sensitive way. I had the same experience when I was attending this review class..the lecturer who was sad to say a medical practitioner, made some rude remarks about people with H. He said "If you have H1, please don't spread it to other people who don't have it! Take pity to whoever will catch t from you!" I felt so bad..and then he added "oh but H2 is a different story..that one is REALLY gross! That is a sexually-transmitted disease that doesn't go away! You shouldn't have a relationship with people with H2 because it is gross!" That shattered my heart..coming from someone who shoukd have been informed since he works in the medical field. Anyway, I didn't have the chance to speak up as I didn't want to make a sensation in the class..I am very proud of you for standing your ground. There are a lot of people who don't know a thing about H. Learjing from that experience, I learned to dismiss comments from people who don't matter to me. I just think that they are ignorant and refuse to learn what H is all about. Now, I avoid people who I know are close-minded because I don't want to strees myself with them. Surround yourself with positive people :)