find the silver lining, tell my story

[trying2]

my ex and I recently started messing around but were still seeing other people since we felt as though we wanted to gradually get back into it. so I shaved one day and then we knocked some boots lol it burned when I peed that day but it turned out to be just the "friction burn" if you know what I mean. 2 or 3 days later it started to hurt again. & I was on, lets say, a camping trip. so I was not at the liberty, nor had the privacy to look down at my vagina in all its glory. & I honestly didn't even think to check because of the environment I was in. I kept praying and praying that the burning would go away, but it wouldn't. some times peeing wouldn't hurt at all, and then one fateful night it burned like hot acid was being poured on my lady parts. It was all I could do to not let out a blood curdling scream. tears flowing down my face. that morning I decided to head to the ER after finding two red bumps on the top of my labia in the shower. 

this "doctor" at the ER had the bedside manner of an iguana. he was constantly insinuating it was my fault and couldn't manage a kind word to save his life. so after spending all day in the ER, this terrible ass doctor sent me home with some Valtrex "just in case" it was HSV2, saying it was not characteristically developed enough for him to give a diagnosis. My ex came and saw me and gave me some encouraging words. Since I did not receive a diagnosis, I decided to NOT take the Valtrex since I typically dont like taking medicine for nothing. I had to go back out to this camping trip and try to save face. but friends would ask, why are you walking like that and would wonder why im not helping out as much (& they were probably more upset than anything). I tried to do what I could, but I could not keep up the farce emotionally. & begged to go home, and was.

I then decided to go to this clinic for a second opinion/more help. I had to wait a day because she didnt have an appointment slot the day after I left the camping trip. So Monday ER, Friday was my clinic appt. Thursday night though, the pain got worse and worse and worse. The only reason I didnt go to the ER again so I didnt have to run into this same jerk face doctor. In the mean time, I tried Epson salt bath, oatmeal bath, it gave me no relief. My appt Friday was SO much better. She was educating me on everything I wanted/needed to know and told me she thinks I MAY have a really bad bacterial infection down there. So I started to have hope. Although, when she took the swabs down there, I swear it felt she was trying to swipe my skin off with a lava knife. (dont ask) unfortunately I had to wait a very long time to get the results of that swab test, so I was researching everything that it could be instead of HSV2. She sent me home with Keflex (one 4x a day, for 10 days. forget the dosage rn), 800 mg Ibuprofen (one 3x a day), I started to take the Valtrex, and Lidocaine 5% and Bactroban (topical, 3x a day). In about 3 days, the lesions that covered almost my entire vagina started to close.

I had my ex there the entire weekend holding my hand whenever I needed to pee (I was of course traumatized by peeing), he applied the Lidocaine and Bactroban for me (with gloves on of course) and was such an emotional rock for me when I was at my complete lowest. he is currently waiting on his results as well since he waited a while to get tested. I received some oral action from other people and he's had sex with someone else, but as for right now, we're not playing the blame game. He constantly is saying we're going through it TOGETHER. so for now, we are ok and still working towards a relationship.

I finally got my concrete results Sep 7th and I was honestly devastated. The doctor stated she thinks it was a bacterial infection on top of the HSV1/2 There was no distinction on whether it was HSV1 or 2, so I still have some unanswered questions. He and I had sex recently and I think I am currently breaking out. I wasn't aware of the 7 day period to wait after everything is clear so I think im about to go through another scare. & we did use protection if you wanted to know. 

Anyways, I wanted to write this to get it off my chest to people who would listen and understand. so if you're still reading, thank you. you are a gem. Maybe someone can read this and somehow gain strength from it. now, im just trying to move on.

[NaturalYam]

Thank you for sharing. i am going through a lot now with a similar issue. Reading this helps others to not feel so alone in my opinion. Im glad you have someone there with you. Im told it gets better with time and lets hope thats the case. Thoughts and prayers out to you!

[sweetlove884]

I'm so so sorry you had to endure the horrible pain and the awful doctor that needs to be fired.  I really think you should file a complaint. 

I have both types. Just found out last night. I've only ever had fever blisters, thank God.  Unfortunately, in ignorance I infected my boyfriend and dealing with that has been hell. He hates me now.  

It sounds like your ex boyfriend is a wonderful man. How supportive and kind. 

[trying2]

Thank you so much @NaturalYam! Its slowly not becoming world shattering issue for me anymore. Time does heal all wounds.

[trying2]

@Mar535 I really ought to have filed a complaint, but I just never want to go anywhere near that place again. I wish I couldve just confronted him then and there. =/

Yes, my ex has been wonderfully supportive. We've since decided to exclusively date one another (for obvious reasons).

Because mine had this accepting nature, its possible that with time yours will too. As I was telling the user above, time heals all wounds, and if it was meant to be he will come around/come back. If he doesn't, maybe you will find someone on here or in passing. I have high hopes for you! Sending love, hugs, and kisses! 

 

[sweetlove884]

@trying2 it sounds like you're feeling better.  So happy to hear that. Curious to know what your boyfriend's results were  

Love, hugs, and kisses back atcha!

 

[trying2]

On 9/25/2018 at 9:37 PM, Mar535 said:

@trying2 it sounds like you're feeling better.  So happy to hear that. Curious to know what your boyfriend's results were  

Love, hugs, and kisses back atcha!

 

@Mar535 So he didn't actually get "results" He went to his provider, told him about me, and that he developed a blister down there. With that, his provider prescribed him some Valtrex. I don't know for sure if he actually took it, because by the time he went, the blister was gone. They never actually tested him or examined, which honestly makes it yet another loose end for me.. ggggrrrrrr!!!!!

They say its much easier to diagnose men though. & I don't know why I felt the need to keep it a secret, but we're both in the Army, so that's why the practice of medicine may be done a little different. 😞

[sweetlove884]

I would be frustrated, too.  Seems like he needs to be tested.  

[OnlyGoodThoughts]

I am so sorry honey. Yep. The "Big H" is a viral infection. So, it makes us more susceptible to infections. Please hang in there. And, most of all, thank you for your service to our country.

[trying2]

On 10/4/2018 at 9:31 PM, Mar535 said:

I would be frustrated, too.  Seems like he needs to be tested.  

@Mar535 exactly!! at least give him the closure of an actual test result. it's honestly infuriating.

[trying2]

On 10/5/2018 at 5:13 PM, OnlyGoodThoughts said:

I am so sorry honey. Yep. The "Big H" is a viral infection. So, it makes us more susceptible to infections. Please hang in there. And, most of all, thank you for your service to our country.

@OnlyGoodThoughts thank you so much for your support! im hanging in there as best as I can & well wishes to you!