ivoryrain

I've only had one definite outbreak. I thought I was having another one and took antivirals, which stopped the possible outbreak in its tracks. I've been itchy after showers lately, and just assumed it was dry skin, as skin all over my body is starting to dry out (thanks, cold weather) and I only itch after a hot shower. I would scratch a fair bit after showering and apply some lotion, which took care of it. I noticed what looks like a small popped blister, but I'm unsure if maybe it's a small sore from scratching since I haven't had any prodromal symptoms and I last looked a day or two ago and saw nothing. It doesn't hurt when urinating or itch when it's touched like my first blisters did. The itching has gotten better the past few days. So far there is nothing else abnormal except a few dark spots that look like scarring from the first outbreak (think the appearance of flat acne scars). I hate this paranoia. I don't want to unnecessarily take my antivirals, but I also know that I need to take them asap if it's an outbreak. I think my aciclovir is causing my hair - particularly my eyebrows and eyelashes - to fall out and I get nauseated towards the end of the course. I plan to discuss this with my OBGYN on the 12th. To those of you H veterans, does this sound common of a recurrence? I know it's impossible to diagnose me over a forum and that it's different for everyone, but I just have no idea about what to expect of recurrences.

@WCSDancer2010 We don't have desks or anything like that. I would have to directly hand it out to people or maybe pin it to a bulletin board where we all clock in at. Maybe I could speak with someone in grounds (supervisors who coordinate our schedules and the individual units, etc.) and suggest some sort of education. The funny thing is that we JUST had to go through a 4-hour training session about not bullying people lol. You'd imagine they would realize that they shouldn't say things like this. My biggest fear is that this resident will overhear what the staff are saying. He suffers from severe depression and suicidal ideation. That is the last thing he needs - to overhear the very people who are supposed to be taking care of him talk about him in a disgusted way. We are the only people that he has. I think that the next time I hear something, I'll probably disclose. I'm not embarrassed about having H; I just don't want people to say terrible things about me. I highly doubt that will happen, though, because as the youngest worker by several years, everyone treats me like their daughter/little sister.

Hey, everyone! I work for a developmental center. One of our residents has genital herpes. On multiple occasions I have heard my coworkers talking about it. This was the conversation a few days ago: Coworker 1: I try to stay out of [resident's unit] because that's where all of the MRSA and hepatitis are. I don't want to be exposed to that. Coworker 2: And herpes! Don't forget the herpes! 1: What??? 2: Yeah, [Resident] has herpes! 1: What? Oh my god I didn't know! How did he get it? 2: I have no idea. It made me feel so bad about myself and for the resident because they were obviously grossed out by it. I suspect that this resident is a victim of sexual abuse because he has severe cerebral palsy and is confined to a wheelchair - he has minimal movement in his extremities. I doubt that he could have intercourse in his condition, so it made me feel so awful that he likely contracted this as a result of abuse and the staff continue to react this way. It's so unprofessional. Then I, of course, feel bad about myself because I have genital herpes, and they're talking about this right in front of me. They obviously have no idea that I have it. I almost disclosed to them because I can't be the only person with herpes who they've said this in front of. I want them to be more careful with their words and let them know how common it is. I didn't say anything because there is a lot of gossip that goes on at work. I want it to be my choice who I disclose to and who I don't disclose to. How would you handle this situation?

19 (about a month ago). I don't know anyone in my age group who has it, but it's not really something that college students talk about :P Statistically, 25% of my female friends have/will have it. As far as I know, I have never had oral cold sores. I don't know what simplex I have genitally.

I started having prodromal symptoms of a second outbreak. I took a few day's worth of my mom's antivirals, which are a bit stronger than mine. I didn't make it back to the pharmacy in time to get my prescription, so I've been without for a day. I feel better and the start of the blisters seem to have gone away - I plan to start my antivirals tomorrow just to be on the safe side. Even though my symptoms are gone, my inguinal lymph node on the right side is so swollen. It doesn't really hurt anymore, but it is almost 1" x 0.5" and extremely firm, though it does move around still. I'm sure it'll stay swollen several days after symptoms disappear as my body is obviously fighting a virus, but I feel like the size is abnormal. Has this been a normal experience for any of you? Or is this something that I should possibly have checked out by a doctor?

I've only had one outbreak (diagnosed last month). I had such terrible nerve pain. I can handle all the lesions in the world (knock on wood that I won't have to lol) compared to that pain. It felt like someone had hit me in the hip with a sledgehammer. My back was affected, but not nearly as much. That just felt like having bad period cramps.

@WCSDancer2010 I'm doing episodic therapy, but I wasn't exactly sure what my prodromal symptoms would be. I didn't really have tingling or anything that I didn't assume was related to my first OB still healing. I'm already on birth control, so I'll probably just skip my periods. Who wants to have periods anyway :P Does your body build up immunity even when you're not having OBs? Or do I need to allow myself to have a few OBs before my body builds up enough antibodies?

I had my first OB on 10/19, a few days before my period. Like clockwork, I'm in the very beginning of my second, a few days before my period. I didn't really have any symptoms until today, other than itching that has been getting better - my OBGYN said it was likely from the healing, so I don't think it was a symptom of this one. I just noticed a pain in my groin. Sure enough, a lymph node on the right side is pretty swollen. I took a look and saw what looks like the very start of a blister. It itches slightly when touched, so there's no doubt it's a blister. I'm out of town and can't get to the pharmacy until Sunday, and that's if I'm home before 6 (unlikely). I'm visiting my parents, so hopefully my mom has some antivirals left over that I can take until I get home. I think I'll go buy a bottle of l-lysine and maybe some other supplements. I guess I'm mainly writing for emotional support. I'm extremely sad right now. I was hoping I wouldn't have another OB this soon. I can't deal with this if it's going to be a monthly thing. I have major depressive affective disorder along with some other mental health issues. I just can't deal with it right now. I feel undesirable, even disgusting. I know logically that these things aren't true and that it's just a skin condition, but depression really has a way with screwing with your thoughts. I just want to get this OB over with.

@WCSDancer2010 I never thought about it that way. I just figured it was more likely because of the higher chances of broken skin, etc., but I figure most people don't have sex during outbreaks sooo never mind lol. That's the approach I've taken with it. I've made it clear that I'm not angry with whomever gave me H or chlamydia because I believe that he honestly had no idea and it takes two to tango. I basically said I'd just like to know to try to build a rough timeframe for how long I was infected before treatment, as chlamydia could have potentially ruined my chances if having children. Unlikely, but I've gotten the shit end of the stick in so many aspects of life already, so I wouldn't be surprised lol. The other guy has yet to be tested as of Sunday. I also want to know if I potentially infected him if I got it from the aforementioned one. It's probably better for my mental health if I don't know this part (guilt), but I feel like I need to know if I infected someone, even if I obviously had no idea I was carrying the virus and he clearly didn't insist on taking more precautions. To be honest, he likely would've been exposed before me if he's honest about his sexual history. Oh well. I can't force anyone to tell the truth or give me proof. I feel like if he says he's negative and won't show me documents, he's lying though lol. I'll probably ask one more time and then drop it with him.

Initially, I didn't want to know who gave me H. Then I found out I had chlamydia as well. As chlamydia may have affected my fertility, I would like to have an estimate of how long I had it before I was treated. I know that I did not get these (or at least chlamydia) from my boyfriend before we broke up around October. I was tested for chlamydia when I had a yeast infection. If I got it from my boyfriend, it was after we got back together in December. He dated an ex who had slept with at least two new people. Anyway, the second person I had sex with was tested on the 30th. He told me he would tell me his results. On the 9th, I knew he had to have had his results, so I asked what they were. He said he was negative. I asked for a picture of his results. He said he threw it away and agreed to request another copy. Riiiggghhhhtttt. Does this seem sketchy to anyone else? If someone said they may have contacted STDs from me and I said I would send my results, I damn well would do so the second I got my negative result lol. I wouldn't want to be the blame. This guy was also pretty sketchy in general - did the whole charm, wine and dine, so to speak...then asked me to have sex with his roommates after I had sex with him...like wtf... Should I press the issue to see about getting a copy of his results? I feel like I have a right to know because this involves my health. I know that I will likely never know for sure who my giver is. I just would like a rough estimate of how long I had chlamydia so I can let my OBGYN know when the time comes for me to try to conceive if I run into any issues. I assume whoever gave me H was who gave me chlamydia, so this guy would be the first person I could've contacted it from since I was negative just a few weeks prior to sleeping with him. Plus, if I contacted it from this guy, then two other people are at risk (one is my rapist and it would serve him right, no matter how callous that makes me sound lol).

Thanks for replies! (Sorry this is so late) She was super understanding and supportive. Even though I felt silly for some of the things I asked, she didn't make me feel stupid for asking. I'm sure she's asked the same questions over and over though :P

@forgivenessandpeace As long as they were in a private area around just staff, it's not a violation. I'm sorry they made you feel that way (hugs). I agree with seeker. I work in a developmental center and a coworker told me to make sure I wear gloves while dressing a particular resident because he has H and she kind of cringed. That was a few weeks before I was diagnosed and I kept thinking back to that afterward. I now just tell myself that she likely just doesn't understand what H really is and isn't, and it can be scary to anyone that H is with you forever. I think it's all fear based.

I have my annual exam today with a new gynecologist since mine retired. My old one was very understanding and comforting with my mother when she was diagnosed with H and told her to give him a call if she ever needed anything. He was just someone who genuinely cared about everyone. He delivered me, so he has known me literally since I was born lol. Anyway, I was diagnosed about 2 or 3 weeks ago, and I'm not too thrilled about telling a doctor I've never met before that I have H. I know that's silly because statistically 25% of her patients have it, but I'm still slightly unnerved. I know a good doctor will not be judgmental or anything less than understanding. I just don't know when the appropriate time to bring it up will be. I assume it'll probably be on the sexual health history checklist and I won't have to directly say it. Are there any questions that I should probably ask? I do want to be tested for HIV and find out which simplex I have, so I'll ask for that (ugh I hate blood work!). I also want to discuss my future fertility because whoever gave me H was probably who gave me chlamydia. If I've had these as long as I believe I have, I could possibly be infertile from the chlamydia. Is there anything I should know for my first annual post-diagnosis? I've never really had a full annual because last year I had a yeast and bacterial infection, so I was told to come back after treatment (which my gyno retired about a month later and my university said they don't perform full annuals - pelvic exam, pap smear, etc - for women under 21 when I scheduled with them wtf???). Sorry this was so long for a few questions, but I guess I'm just kind of nervous, especially because I'm going by myself - my mom and I always scheduled the same day :P

Maybe just giving her some space for a few days will help. Then you can explain to her what H really is and isn't. Most people think it's some terrible disease that alters your life forever and that they WILL contract it no matter what. You can always try the handouts and whatnot from here if she isn't understanding.

As someone who has gone through both criminal and civil proceedings for sexual assault, I would not recommend any litigation without solid proof that the giver knowingly gave it to you (i.e. some sort of admission from giver in text or with witnesses, medical records, etc). Even then it would be a he-said, she-said sort of case. It would very much be like a sexual assault case where the victim is put on trial, and it is so very brutal and can be very public. To me, it's not worth having the public potentially know every detail of my intimate life - anyone can request court records, which have all of your information unless you're a minor or sexual assault victim (some jurisdictions may treat a case like this with the same guidelines as sexual assault and redact the plaintiff's name). Many of us with H already suffer some sort of psychological harm as a result of how it makes us feel about ourselves at first. Why take the risk of making it worse? These kinds of cases are very difficult to prove, and even with solid evidence and what seems like a sure win, juries do weird things. As someone studying criminology, I know how selfomly adequate justice is served.

I don't know how I feel about lawsuits. In some states, not disclosing/lying about STD status can even make it rape because you're consenting to sex with someone you believe is STD free. In states that only protect against HIV/AIDS, it can be charged as assault. Personally, if I had proof that my giver knew and lied (I've always asked), I think my knee jerk reaction would be that I would want some sort of justice through criminal and/or civil proceedings. In the same sense, that all can turn very public, and people I know may stigmatize me one way or another, whether it be repulsion or uncomfortableness about me using their bath towels. Plus, it stigmatizes it as some terrible disease that you should sue over if someone knowingly gives it to you, which it's really not THAT bad...more of an inconvenience and a little bit of uncomfortableness

I was having such severe pain that I thought my UTI caused a kidney infection. A few days later once sores developed, it felt like someone hit me in the hip with a sledgehammer. My doctor said it was all from the outbreak and that antivirals should help the pain, too. Sure enough, after a day or two it lessened and went away completely in about a week. There could be many causes for your pain, but that's just my personal anecdote.

@willow @Trying Thanks! I actually think it's PID as a result of ch. that causes infertility, not the ch. itself. Idk. That's just how I read it after some more research. So far the odds have not been in my favor though lol. I guess I'll just have to wait until my annual next Friday grr.

Three visits since last Monday. Do I at least get a cookie? :P All joking aside, PP called me again to tell me I have chlamydia. Idk if this is even the right place to post this, but you've all been so wonderful and supportive and someone on here has to have had this too since it's so incredibly common. Anyway, I went in, took my antibiotics, told my boyfriend and past partners to go get tested for this too, blahblahblah. I'm just kind of down in the dumps because whoever gave me H probably gave me chlamydia. I'm positive it wasn't my boyfriend who gave my chlamydia because I was tested last October when he had been my only partner. Unless his ex he got back with during our breakup had picked up something while they were broken up, and then he gave it to me when we got back together. But I highly doubt that. My rapist likely didn't give me chlamydia because he wore a condom. That leaves two people. I want to wring their necks, but I know they likely didn't know. I'm just frustrated and sad and worried that I may have something else. I have my annual next week and will just see about a full test then. I'm worried I'm infertile now. If I got it from one of my two past partners, I've had this almost a year. Having a family of my own is my biggest dream. I would be crushed if I can't have my own children now. Has anyone one here had a similar experience? How did it turn out? I'm just so worried I'll never be able to have my babies grow inside me and experience what pregnancy is like...

Hey, girl! Just wanted to offer some insight of someone a little younger than you. I haven't learned everyone's ages yet, but I'm probably one of the younger ones here at 19. I considered not disclosing in future relationships if my boyfriend were to leave me. I ALMOST didn't tell past partners, including the one I think gave this to me. But then I sat down and thought really hard about how I would've changed my decisions had my partner known and how I would have felt had that partner known and not told me. Taking away someone's choice isn't right. This doesn't make you a bad person. This makes you scared. I was scared about disclosing to past partners because one of them knows a ton of the same people I do back in my hometown. I decided that my reputation wasn't worth the risk that they are infecting other girls, likely unknowingly. I would feel terrible if I got that message from one of them telling me to get checked out because they found out they had it, when I could've told them months, possibly even years earlier, that they had possibly given this to me (or that I had given it to one of them). I'd just also like to point out in case no one else has that many states have laws against not disclosing. In my state it's a felony. I don't want to go to prison for being too scared to disclose a skin condition lol.

@willow @inka @whitedaisies I've been on them since Friday, but I've also been on so many meds the past week and a half that maybe my body just can't handle it. I do have H, though - positive culture, lesions, etc. I wish it were just the flu :P Could be stress. Idk. It was all water and yogurt that came up, so maybe I drank too much water (I rarely drank water before.) I feel better after resting some, but still kinda nauseated. I'm going to try to eat some strawberries.

I had to leave my lab early because I vomited twice in the bathroom. I came home and dry heaved at least 3 times in maybe 2 minutes. I know vomiting is a symptom of HSV and side effect of Aciclovir, but is this something I should go to the doctor for? I've felt nauseated for about a week and a half off and on. My boyfriend is at work, so I'm dealing with this by myself and I'm just miserable because I don't think I can even get up off the bathroom floor long enough to get a drink. Is this relatively common? I do tend to overwork my body because I'm a work-a-holic and school-a-holic lol. Does anyone have any tips for nausea from HSV/Aciclovir? I plan on getting some rest if my stomach will calm down. I told my boyfriend to bring home some crackers and ginger ale and I plan on calling to get an anti-nausea medicine filled, but I don't think I can even drive myself to pick it up without throwing up. Feeling pretty discouraged.

I didn't use tampons since I already had an angry vagina with the BV and UTI lol. You may want to use pads to see if your period seems abnormal. Mine did (thinner texture and lighter in color...also shorter flow), but again, I can't be sure of the cause. The last thing I felt like doing is sticking anything up there lol.

I'm so full of questions as time goes on that I can't possibly hold them all until I have my annual on the 7th lol. So my boyfriend hasn't been tested yet (I found out on Friday, so he had to wait for the weekend to pass). If he is negative or if I end up with a negative partner in the future, how can I naturally conceive without risk? Will he just have to accept that there will be some if we choose to naturally conceive? I would obviously be on suppressive therapy and cautious of potential outbreaks. I don't plan on having children for another 6-8 years, so by then I'm sure my body will have a pretty decent line of defense.

Oh wow. I'm so sorry that all happened to you. Your body belongs solely to you, which means that no means no. Only a clear and enthusiastic yes is consent. Do not feel like any of this is your fault. If there is one thing that I've learned as a rape victim myself, it's that you can go through all of the what ifs and I should haves but that doesn't change what happened and that doesn't place any of the blame on yourself. You did what you felt you had to do to survive, and there is zero shame in that. Now that that's out of the way, your ex seems like a real jerk. Someone who genuinely cares about your health, feelings, and well-being would never say things like he did. I really hope that you can start your healing process. You deserve to heal and be loved by someone who deserves YOU.