Found out I may have herpes, but have already had sex with my new girl friend. What just happened?

[Whatjusthappened]

I'm going through a divorce and met a girl a few weeks ago. I went down to sign papers and my now ex wife tells me that she had herpes bit never said anything because I never said anything! What the hell is that? I'm angry, I mean I loved her so it wouldn't have made a difference I guess, but now, I've had unprotected sex with this amazing woman and I am terrified to tell her. I haven't made it home from you divorce trip, I have another week.

I've already stopped by the clinic to get tested, but I guess I already know. We were together for two years. I don't are about any of that. I just need advice on how to proceed. I have to tell her, no question, but how?

"Hey I know we've just met and I think we're a bit more than casual, but I have to let you know that just found out I have herpes!?????" No way that ends well. I just need help... and a beer... and a cigarette.

[HikingGirl]

Get tested first. You may not have it. I found out I had HSV1 and HSV2 about a year after my divorce. I told my ex-husband and he wound up testing negative for both, which meant I'd had it for about 20 years and had no idea. My ex and I were together for 16 years--I'm still amazed he's negative, but it's possible.

 

If you feel a conversation with the new woman is in order, just be honest and let her know you're in the process of getting tested. You didn't know.

[HikingGirl]

p.s. Make sure you're getting a type-specific IgG blood test.

[Katidid]

Yeah, very possible you don't have it. Any reason to think you do??

[Sweetsoulxo]

I just went through a similar situation...I didn't know...no symptoms...my bf was very supportive to my surprise?! Just get educated and remain as calm as possible when you tell her! Her reaction will be based off how you present it to her.

[Bambina3]

I wouldn't say one word until you know for sure you have it

Good luck

[Whatjusthappened]

Ok. Its really helpful. I dont know if i do. I think i would notice something down there. Itching, bumps or something??? I woke up with pink eye two days ago and saw it could also be herpes and died. I know im freaking out. i truly appreciate the lack of judgement on this site. Thank you for taking the time to respond.

[anonymousprince]

Many times, an HSV-2 infection is asymptomatic or causes very mild symptoms that evade our attention. So, getting tested with the HSV-2 IgG -type-specific test would be a good idea to know where you are standing. If the result is a low positive, confirmation with the golden standard Western Blot test that only University of Washington offers is an option, but it may not be easy to obtain. Best of luck!

[hippyherpy]

Pretty much everyone has HSV.