seeker

ok, but A, its not the CDCs money when it comes to testing. B, it then should be policy to offer the option. C, even if its a minority of people who actually change behavior that minority would slow/stop the spread of a virus. D, since when has testing been about behavior and not knowledge? E, the negative consequences are a direct result of a lack of knowledge that would be given out IF every damned splint and pill quack were up to date on their info. and if it were SOP, there might be a chance they would be. I had to go to a private lab for my test, I found out via email and almost lost my lunch and didn't sleep. now if I had been able to go to a knowledgeable doctor and gotten my results with a " well you have H2 but its manageable and you can and will have a normal life with a few precautions, precautions that for the most part you should be doing anyway until in a committed relationship. those people aren't changing because they aren't being given the proper info AND the whole reason for not testing is stigma driven thereby reinforcing the stigma. law of unintended consequences anyone?

So, this has helped me in the past and I realized that It will occur tonight. I will be going to a friends house till late, after midnight. on my way home I will pass thru less than stellar areas. I have found in my life that driving through these places and looking, actually seeing the people who are on the street at 12, 1 or 2 am can be a real eye opener. a real, ' well maybe my life isn't so bad" moment. I know a lot of these people have had bad luck, made bad choices or are just trying to get by. ( they all cant be walking home from the second shift at the house of pancakes). that being said, ive had more than a few " there but for the grace of god " moments. I have a family who cares and would never let me be homeless nor hungry, I have friends who care. I have a job that lets me pay my bills and have some fun. I can afford good hygiene, all the accoutrements of having herpes: tea tree oil, peroxide, antivirals, etc. im not an addict ( except to the ladies on h opp) I can sleep in a bed tonight with heat or air conditioning as needed. I have a cupboard full of food (some even healthy!) . a 12 pack of blue moon in the fridge for sunday ( not the whole thing, jesh). etc. seeing other people who, for whatever reasons are in a very bad place, who could be me if a few things didn't go my way can be helpful in putting a few blisters and back discomfort and gasp, having to hold off on sex a month a year into perspective.

@ dancer, thanks for the visual

I agree with dancer ( and no im not a doctor but I like to play doctor) ive known some people with shingles. it usually presents in older folks and that may be why its so painful, older less robust immune system so it comes on like gangbusters. one thing to think about is, herpes is pretty much a contact virus. it has to contact the area you present it on. so if you have it one your side it was either auto inoculation, she had it all over her hands and grabbed you there or she rubbed herself on your back. now while im sure that could be fun and im open minded and all im not seeing a girl basically tribbing with your back.

@ redroses, it takes about 4 months to get a true positive on a blood test. so FLNewH has had it at least 4 months. I don't remember all the details of her love life ( that just sounds odd for some reason, truly no secrets around here) so with the results and maybe some math on partners it adds up to a minimum of........ not recent.

ok. I was a bit confused. thought it was a recent diagnosis and we were heading down the stealth seller path. my bad. heard this recently, really struck me. part of a song by a Chilean artist, thanks to life, which has given me so much. it gave me laughter and it gave me tears. with them I distinguish happiness from pain the two elements that make up my song, and your song, as well, which is the same song. and everyones song, which is my very song. your not alone, to paraphrase Kahlil Gibran in the prophet, your joy can only go as high as your sorrow has deep. so I figure we all got some great times ahead of us!

well, I remember back in the mid 80S a miracle drug from Africa that would cure drug addiction. it was some plant used by a tribe for adulthood rituals. 48 hours of tripping ala LSD and bam, no addiction. heroin, cocaine addicts had about an 90% success rate in European countries that tried it. our governments reasons for not trying it. " we aren't sure of the side affects" yep, side affects from a plant used for 1000 years. oh and exactly what are the side affects from being a heroin addict??? of course that was during Ronnie Rayguns and Nacy " my astrologer says just say no" time. you know when America started heading down the batshit crazy path we are on. science deniers, :truth" more important than FACTS. we truly live in an idiocracy.

im confused. when did you get diagnosed? you have another thread extolling the virtues of a plant you have used for a year.

stripper gram

my brother if the ladies are telling you she is psycho, she is psycho.

PS is positive singles. how is it the tinder girl is friends with someone who has H and is so afraid of it?

@ FLNewH im curious about the test you did as at the clinic HIV is part of the panel. its HIV, G, CH, and S. but no H1 or 2. oh and its only 20$

did they test for G? or CH?

well my friend welcome first off and you have yourself a pickle here for sure. I can only share my experience and am in no way a doctor though I do like to play doctor. when I get an itch it is usually in a spot ive had a bump and its very "concentrated" like its 1 very specific dot of itch I just want to dig in and get rid of, I want to cauterize it to stop it. might last a day or two and it comes and goes. never have I had any large area itching nor large area bumps. even during my horrific original OB I only had 4 bumps, but a 103.5 fever for 3 days that I "broke" a minimum of 12 times. I will also tell you this, I never had an allergy in my life till the day I did. I worked in environmental restoration and was in a field clearing a invasive plant when I was hit by ragweed so bad I literally had stuff coming out of my nose like I was throwing up through it. it took a now not prescribe ubber antihistamine to get it under control. my point is we can suddenly develop allergies OR we could have had them but hadn't been exposed previously. im wondering how long they needed for the blood test? I used a private lab called anylabtestnow and I had my results in 2 days. my local PP doesn't do blood test for herpes only swab. sounds to me, and I am no expert by any means, that its shingles. they didn't swab test the bumps? is there even a test for shingles? fyi, urgent care doctors are mainly cold and bruise people. real stuff, esp stuff like herpes is beyond them unless they just happen to be curious. ( or have it).

yes willow, celiac. I saw an interview with some chick and she was talking about it affecting serotonin production. I forgot her name, has it and is a big proponent about it. it struck me because I wondered how it may have played into our divorce.

Blood test or swab? Both of you need to get tested. Also for type, either of you could have had H for a long time and not know. He could have hsv1 orally since childhood and gave it to you genitally. Ask him to get tested , if he procrastinates that could be a red flag. Hope for the best but be prepared for the worse. Show him the handouts, this site,etc.

yeppers it can. I have a fairly dark sense of humor and fairly politically incorrect so none of this bothers me. if people want to be ignorant let them. also, did you see the person? it could have been a street urchin or a prostitute or such and the reaction was to that. and many STIs might make people uncomfortable. id not let it get to you. don't let their ignorance dictate how your day is going to go. you cant fix stupid. ive also heard that hospital workers have pretty sick senses of humor, coping mech.

you are not dangerous!!! its no where near HIV, hell even HIV isn't what it used to be. trust me a sexy latina will have no issues getting the attention of men. and yes there will be men ( I am speaking for my better brothers) who will want to be with you, all of you not just sexually.

you are not alone. auto inoculation ( self spreading) is mainly only happening in the first few months of having the virus, then your body has the ability to fight it pretty good. lots of people have sex who have herpes, it just requires a little more thought. after a while OBs become less frequent and with suppressive , though if you both have the same kind that seems unnecessary. I would recommend a blood test just to type it, and yes for both of you. congrats on the wee one, in about 19 weeks your going to be more concerned with poopy diapers than herpes.

thanks but im not sure I postulated the question correctly. im wondering if it makes it easier to get back into dating itself, like a pre season (lol). not saying those relationships are doomed. just its hard enough to date, hard to get back into it after a long term relationship, add H and it gets rather epic.

my ex has that wheat allergy thing ( am not going to try to spell it this early in my coffee cycle) and it does affect production of serotonin which does affect mood. I went thru a period of depression and was on SSRIs and it was a world of difference, anxiety was far lower.

yes more info is needed. are you sure it was her? I read that PS had been giving out info to their sister sites. @forgiveness, about as heinous as someone not disclosing IMHO.

@ corissa forgiveness is for you. holding a grudge is like taking poison and hoping the other person dies. it is NOT forgetting nor letting off the hook. and don't worry, men will still like you, want to date you, etc and yes, even after you disclose. if I may be so bold, you look to be a very attractive woman ( as are all the women on here for some reason) so I have no doubt the men will be falling all over for you. this is just new and you are dealing with the stigma, the new info, the potential betrayal, etc. it will get better, just look at the vets on here. they have better social lives now than I had pre H (sigh).

ok, so I was thinking about this the other day. for those who have begun dating again, or anyone else who wants to offer an opinion, would it be or is it easier if your first post diagnosis dating experience is with someone who is H+? I mean not already in a relationship when you found out but starting fresh, square one. just to "get your groove back and renormalize intimacy? we'll have coffee and we'll tawk, discuss.

good for you