sweetlove884

I imagine that if you're honest and explain it just like you explained it here, he will be understanding.

What's a female condom? Do tell

Do either of you have fever blisters?

Hi Ishmael, All good points. Thank you At this point, I can't educate anyone. My own knowledge is very limited, since I just found out and lost my boyfriend. What I said as far as dismissing them was along the lines of--thank you for your time and matching with me. I wish I was clean. You're so handsome (or hot)! Honestly, I really would prefer to limit myself to those with herpes. I've already infected my boyfriend and I never want that to happen again. The fallout was huge and I bear a lot of guilt.

I previously posted this replying to a different topic, but I thought it might be seen more in a post of it's own. I just did a little experiment with a dating app similar to Tinder. I stopped swiping with 6 matches. After introductions I told them I was looking for someone with herpes, because I have it. They all said they didn't have it. I thanked them for their time and basically said they were dismissed. 2 very strongly want to meet me and date me anyway. 1 discussed some creative, safe things we could do and is still hanging around. The other 3 unmatched, but ALL we're super sweet and understanding. It was a great experience Hope this helps someone feel hopeful.

Aww. I'm glad I could help. Drop dead gorgeous, no but they are sweet to compliment my looks. But I'm a very much older woman! Lol. And these are YOUNG guys.

I just did a little experiment with a dating app similar to Tinder. I stopped swiping with 6 matches. After introductions I told them I was looking for someone with herpes, because I have it. They all said they didn't have it. I thanked them for their time and basically said they were dismissed. 2 very strongly want to meet me and date me anyway. 1 discussed some creative, safe things we could do and is still hanging around. The other 3 unmatched, but ALL we're super sweet and understanding. It was a great experience

Hello and hugs to you. Are you a man or woman? Doesn't matter. Just wonder. I'm new to this, just diagnosed last month, so I don't have a lot of insight. But I want to let you know I was listening and I care Last night I experimented with disclosing on a dating app. After introductory pleasantries, I dove right in. It didn't seem to run anyone off. One of them came up with a few safe sex activities I wouldn't have thought of. Lol I may never hear from them again, but at least it was fun and no rejection. Maybe you could try some more.

I think it's kinder to tell him. If you just break up with him for no reason surely that will hurt him. On the other hand, he may be very angry with you for not getting tested. That will be really hard for you to go through. Just pray he doesn't have it.

Are you sure the headaches aren't caused by the pill? I believe for some it causes them

Yep. He was really pissed. That's for damn sure. I wasn't willingly not disclosing. I did not understand that I needed to. I didn't realize it was herpes herpes. I thought they were two different things. Of course now I know better!! I was an ignorant dumbass. But you don't know what you don't know.

I also said I'm paying it all

No kidding. That's what I said in the original post

My style may not be your style, but in general, I like to tell any bad stuff right away to save time. For example, I always describe my body this way--small breasts, fat stomach, nice ass. Lol. That way I can eliminate the boob men right away. Haha To me, it's a numbers game. Because soooo many flake. It's frustrating when you've invested a lot of time in them.

I haven't gotten to try it out. I'm still with my boyfriend at the moment, but I don't know if we're going to make it. I infected him in ignorance and he has a lot of anger toward me. But if I do go back on I plan to say it first thing. Like right after hello and how are you.

For me, if I went back on Tinder I wouldn't put it in my profile in case someone I knew saw it. But I would tell right away. It's too time consuming to wait for me. I try to be efficient. I only had so much time available to search

Here are my thoughts for what they're worth, but I'm recently diagnosed so don't have experience with this. To me, it depends on what type of dating you're doing and how much time you have to devote to your search for a partner. I've been with mine 7 months, and I met him on Tinder. Before I met him I used Tinder for several months. Well on there, my experience was that I had plenty of matches and plenty more where those came from. Even getting to a first date was a lengthy process. All that texting beforehand, often being ghosted, cancelled on, stood up, sending more pictures, etc. Then the date, finding out I didn't like them or they didn't like me, then waiting to get asked out again. And if I was juggling several it was really time consuming and hard. So, if I was to go back on Tinder, I would tell before going through all that. It would make everything so much faster and efficient.

Hello, I'm female. Diagnosed a couple of weeks ago with both types after my partner had a genital outbreak which was caused by my fever blister. I live near Houston, but location doesn't matter. I would like a male buddy of any age.

Just to add--i know it's horrible to think of having to disclose. I recently passed to my partner not knowing I had it and I have had to bear the full force of his rage and most likely hate for several weeks now. On top of that I'm pretty sure I lost HIM. It hurts. But I still say you owe it to him and his future partners to tell him

I think you have to tell him. No matter what. He may have contracted it and could now pass it on to other innocent women. If you dont, that would be a horrible thing to do.

Hi, I'm not sure how much online dating you've done, but I've done quite a bit. I've been ghosted dozens of times. Some after just texting (once after 7 weeks!) And also after 1st, 2nd, or 3rd dates. Usually there was no reason whatsoever that I could figure out. Its just part of the dating world. Herpes or not. My experiences were before I knew about the herpes. Try not to let it get to you and move on. There are plenty of guys out there.

Oh, that's awesome, livingbeyond!

Oh, that really sucks. You're certainly old enough to choose to have sex. And this is life. These things happen. I hope you won't take her criticism to heart. Hugs. Hope she comes around with some sympathy and caring soon. Has she never screwed up?

I'm new to all this, so probably don't have the knowledge or understanding the veterans do, so take this for what it's worth. But I feel like I wouldn't want to convince someone to take a chance on the virus. That would be a big burden for me to carry if they contracted it. If they were emphatic that they wanted to go forward, I might. But otherwise, I would understand and wish them well. For me, going forward, I think I would prefer to find someone who already had it.

Aww. I'm so sorry. Was it that you'd been sexually active or that you got herpes? How old are you?