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Clarity

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  1. I can relate. Haven’t told a single ex. I feel guilty sometimes too. Moving forward, I’ll always disclose. It I don’t think I’ll be going back in time. Now to just find peace in that...
  2. I understand your struggle. People Don’t disclose their oral herpes, at least I’ve never heard of it. Should they, probably. But that’s a whole lot of people. You’re probably much less likely to give it to someone through kissing than someone who has hsv 1. But the way society deals with it is super crazy. Would you be opposed to dating on a HSV dating site? It could take away a lot of the stress. That’s probably what I would do. That much more to life than herpes, deep down, you know that. We just need to keep reminding ourselves. Sending you love. And also, I’m jealous of your traveling!
  3. Yes!!! I would totally revolt with you. Let’s do it!
  4. I would recommend calling a therapist so you have someone to talk to. I just made an appointment on Wednesday and I can’t wait. I can tell you my story, not sure it’ll inspire you but here goes. During an 11 year relationship I never transmitted HSV. I had a child who was born perfectly healthy and is 7, and she doesn’t have HSV either. I have my horse and downs but my life is good. I stay hyper focused on what may cause me stress and I get rid of it. It’s empowered me and given me strength. And you can have a life just as full as mine. Figure out ways to cope and to mange your bad days and then remember who you were before this. You are still that person! And the world needs that person. Much love to you
  5. The only thing I’ve identified is stress. The kind when you can feel the cortisol pumping through your body, your heart is racing, your hands are shaking, your mind is laser focused on that one thing that really pushed you over the edge.
  6. Prior to my diagnosis I felt like a sexy goddess. I would never say that to the public, but felt it with every cell of my body. But here we are, post diagnosis and a different me. I miss my old energy. I want to feel alive and on fire again. Can you relate? And what occurred for you to feel like a goddess agin?
  7. Hello. Reading your story, this is what I would do... I would start taking the anti viral three days before seeing him and during as well. Just to help give you peace of mind. I would also use a condom. Between the meds and the condom the risk is much lower. I would do this until the relationship reached engagement and then discuss your sexual relationship and herpes with him again. By that point, you will likely have a better foundation for your intimacy and can let your sexy out! Also, you can tell him how you’re feeling and let him know you want to get through this mental road bump with him. Let him savor every inch of your body and help you feel like yourself again. Sounds good to me haha
  8. I often wonder about this myself. I have HSV2 and to be honest, after living with it, knowing what I know, I wouldn’t have been comfortable dating someone who had it. It’s been that bad for me. And that doesn’t make me a jerk. Or anyone else not worth it. Everyone has their reasons and are entitled to them. I wouldn’t want anyone to have the experience I’ve had. The first 6 years were not a huge deal overall. The past year has been brutal. Full of pain and tears and sleep. I am hopefully improving now. I’m trying really hard. A few thoughts on why they don’t seem to care.. I don’t think people realize how it can impact their health over a lifetime. They think they won’t actually get it. They are just super awesome humans who really do love you. They realize that so many people have it that if the government doesn’t help us, we all will lol. And I think they do care, but they don’t want to sound like a jerk. And then when they have time to process it, love conquers all and they decide that they do see you instead of your disease and are willing to hold your hand through it all. HSV gives relationships a pause and a real ness that likely doesn’t happen otherwise. I think it can take your relationship to the next level and change tour opinion of people. It’s both a blessing and a curse. Much love
  9. Hello. 2/3 of the population already have HSV1, mostly orally. I would have her go to the doctor to get tested. She likely already has it. If she has it, she can’t get it again. Then you should be good to go, still avoiding Sex during an outbreak though I’d suggest. If she doesn’t have it, I think this would really be up to her. Is she ok with getting oral herpes. She may, she may not. But she should take time and really consider it.
  10. Me too sister. Me too. For all of us. Did they give an estimated time that they will produce the new medication? I heard of these vaginal suppositories you can make and I love them. You form them out of coconut oil once you mix it with a bit of tea tree oil. I’d look it up so you balance it right. But I keep mine in the fridge. When I need it, I put a towel down and pop that baby in there then lay in bed for 20 minutes or so. It feels good and makes wiping easier and less painful for the rest of the day.
  11. This is a great question. After I found out I didn’t go back and fell any of my exes. As far as I know, they don’t have it. I feel like I should tell them all but I am really struggling as well.
  12. I can relate to all of you! I’m 37 and after 6 years mine is 100% worse for the Past year. It’s terrible. It’s ruling my life. I do my best to cope. On another support group I explained this and the moderator said that our immune system changes every 7 years. Not sure if this is true but I guess it would make sense. I believe the virus may be evolving too. Just like the flu. Everyone is very familiar with how the flu changes each year. Maybe taking the anti vitals for too long isn’t a good thing because it Won’t work when you need it. What I do is constantly work on eliminating every potential stress from my life. This doesn’t seem realistic but living like this isn’t either. I had to quit my high stress job, I eat mostly organic, I do not eat at restaurants, I do a lot of self care, I use natural makeups, deodorants, candles, soaps. I journal everything to bring attention to what else I can do. It’s a constant search for what else I can do. I am on the verge of breaking up with my 11 year relationship (in which I didn’t give HSV to them) because it Causes me a lot of stress. This might sound a little woo woo but all of a sudden I am seeing a lot of posts about it getting worse, could it be the universe? Could it be something happening that we dont quite understand? I have been able to line my periods up with the moon, which is how it used to be. So if big shifts are happening, would that not affect us? I don’t know. I am grateful for the relationship that herpes has given me with my body. I have never been so in tune with myself. But these constant outbreaks are hard and I pray for relief for all. This is a serious condition. We need help. And we are definitely not getting the attention needed for this disease.
  13. Three things, I’ll skip the fluff because the Post above are amazing. 1. The best anti inflammation diet is to cut processed food and take a paleo/primal approach. I know your vegan but it sounds like your life is on the line. Go for it. Go all in. Just look up the paleo diet or the primal blueprint. 2. Lume deodorant can be used on your groin and many people have had much success. Natural ingredients that may even help with herpes symptoms. 3. I have heard that your immune system changes every 7 years. You could look into that. Perhaps you’re going through a change. if I were you, I’d be on an organic paleo diet while only using natural products. For example, natural laundry soap, makeup, no candles or air fresheners, take a fine tooth comb through your whole life and get back to basics and nature. I live like this anyways. And it’s not a hassle just takes some getting used to.
  14. Hello dear soul. I feel your pain through this post. I wish I could give you a hug. I have had mine for 7 years and it is currently worse than ever so I am here with you. I have decided to take the antiviral everyday to cut back on the outbreaks. If you haven’t tried that yet, I would encourage it. There are three different antivirals and you could work with your doctor to trial each. This could take months but a solution could be the result. I too have a lot of pain. I’m often jealous of those who don’t. Some days it’s an 8/10 and every step I take hurts. Some days I just break down and cry. But brighter days are always around the corner. No matter what. I practice a lot of self care which I highly encourage. EpsoM salt baths, alone time, reading, meditation, prayer, supportive family and friends, being in nature, or anything that feels good to you. I have not discovered all of my triggers yet either but I would be happy to do so with you. Most veterans figure their bodies out and find a way to have a beautiful life and we can too. There are a lot of home remedies you can try while having an outbreak. Maybe focus on those and adopt the mantra “I am healing”. I am sending you love and would love to chat with you. You can get through this.
  15. I believe that anything you inject into your body can cause an OB. Personally, my body does not handle stress well. Even road rage will give me an outbreak lol. I do not get any vaccines but I understand you need to for work. I would suggest doing a lot of self care and showing yourself a lot of love around that time. When you know you’re getting the shot, start a couple days before: epsom salt baths, quiet time, meditation, being with family or calm friends, being in nature etc. But if you start to see a pattern of the shot plus an outbreak, I personally would start the anti viral meds a day or two before each time I had to do it. Much love
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