HerryTheHerp

It's possible. Condoms/dental dams will go a long way towards reducing the risk during oral, as will suppressive therapy and avoiding sex during prodomes or outbreaks. There are some great materials on this site re: disclosure and all the details. Just remember to stay relaxed, stay positive, stay calm. The more calm you are, the better it will go. There's a lot of info on the web, but the things Adrial has put together here are spot on. Also, practice with someone else first. You get one shot at this, and you'll want to get it perfect. Since you've known this person for a long time, there's no rush. Wait until you've rehearsed it and have it down perfect.

I don't care if I live a long life just so long as at the end of my days I can say that I lived them all as if they were my last. - Me

I was watching the Grammy's tonight. I usually don't, however, when one of your best childhood friends is being nominated for one you tend to pull up a seat and pay attention. I was chatting with this friend not long ago. We reminisced about the past and talked about where we've been, where we're going, and some of the things we've gone through along the way. Mostly, we talked about some of the pranks we used to pull together and were both famous for; many of which are still whispered about in reverent tones throughout the halls of our school and reunions we've never attended. We even talked about the time back in 10th when I asked him to transpose some lyrics to my HS sweetheart's favorite song so I could play it for her on Valentine's. And, even though our years together didn't work out and she's married to a wonderful man and has children of her own now, I'm sure halfway around the world she's thinking about that evening tonight and letting it take her breath away one more time. Forget going to Jared; I had a future Grammy winner give my first love a gift she'll never forget. Suck it Casanova! It was a good conversation. In an inadvertently poignant way, it reminded me who I am, where I'm from, and that no matter where I go or what happens to me, the person I was is still the person I am. Warts, wrinkles, viruses, and all. I'm not going to let genital friggin herpes or anything else take that away from me. And, this morning as I listen to this song written by an old friend I'm reminded that I have a choice. We all have a choice regardless of the challenges we face. Life's going to kick and there will be bumps along the road. Some will be small, some will be large. Some will challenge you, some could kill you. At the end of the day life is all about how we choose to overcome these bumps and blisters and move forward. I've had a rough few weeks and have some rough and scary days ahead. But, this morning as I look in the mirror I can see the word "overcomer" staring right back at me from the hole in my heart that this diagnosis has opened up. It's right there in flashing neon daring me not to see it. It's daring you to hear the words to this song and see the same thing in yourself.

How do you tell someone you get cold sores. Let's see, I think I saw you were 39, right? We're old enough that we can try this approach. I generally just say "Hi, I'm Herry. I get cold sores. Vouley vous couches avec mois?" It's a great ice breaker and the talk is out of the way. Seriously though, HSV1 is so common in the late 30's that it's far from an issue. You're making a mountain out of a molehill and most people won't pay it a second thought.

Yep, this one isn't using medicine, it's using the body's own DNA and RNA to kick it down. It's like tuning up an engine so it's more efficient. If this works, and there are indications that it might, it's a game changer for the world of medicine and could have significant impact on other viruses.

You can do anything you want. You can coat that sucker in honey and lemon and dress it up in pretty li'l bows if it makes you happy. The question is "Should you get a Brazilian wax?" That's a different question altogether. Some women say that waxing can trigger an OB, others don't have that problem. The only way to find out is to try it and see. As a sidenote, as a guy, I've never had a Brazilian. I had my back waxed once. Hurt like hell. In fact, the only way for me to describe the pain is to say that it felt like I was being attacked by an angry mob of skeeters. So, my hat is off to all you ladies. The things you do to your bodies in the name of beauty, well, there's some fat bald guy wearing leather in a French dungeon in hell holding a cat of nine tails right now saying "Why didn't we think of that?" In fact, it wouldn't surprise me if at least one member of the Lancome or L'Oreal families was at one time a torture specialist.

BV is a common condition. The vagina is a delicate little flower with a serious attitude problem. One little change in ph, stress levels, or the bacterial balance and "BOOM!" the playground is closed for a week. Eat some probiotics, avoid douching, get some sleep, relax, and it'll get back to normal on its own. Keep in mind the use of antibiotics to treat BV can actually make it worse. Your bumps could have been everything from foliculitis to a simple pimple. The swab came back negative for HSV, so I would tend to trust that. Get off Google. I can read through your notes and see you're going through Google. Don't do it. Google is like an evil clown. Google will convince you that an ingrown hair is really the first sign of leprosy. I don't think your doctor called the CDC. Herpes is annoying, but it's not something the CDC is going to get overly concerned with. The only exception is when Joe Francis or the gals from ASU go on Spring Break, in which case the folks at the CDC call that "Spring Outbreak." That usually occurs about 4-6 weeks after all the girls have gone home. Your parents and sister have cold sores? Mine too. Yes, you can have HSV1 without ever having a symptom. In fact, I'm willing to bet you got it as a kid, had such mild symptoms you never noticed, and you're just fine. Is it possible you acquired it during oral sex from your ex as an adult? Of course, but stop stressing about it. If you did, GHSV1 might show up once or twice and then it tends to become a silent roommate that most people never see again. Ever. You can't move forward because of one word. Gooooogle....goooooo gul....googul, googul, googul dunanah. It's like this shark that's chomping at your mind trying to convince you that there's blood in the water. There isn't. You're fine. Go have a glass of wine. Take a bubble bath. Go for a walk. Read a book. Watch a movie. Stop stressing.

Acyclovir is pretty much the generic standard for Valtrex and everything else out there. That's really the only difference between them. Think of it as the black and white box of the same thing. Very few strains of HSV1 or 2 are resistant to it. Thus, if it works for you then go with it as it's also the cheapest. If it doesn't work, you may want to consider Valacyclovir which is a little more potent, requires only one pill a day, and is known as a "prodrug;" that means it doesn't really contain medicine, but what it does is cause your body to convert it into a medicine and produce Acyclovirin within the blood. This means more of it gets into your system and isn't lost during digestion in the stomach. It's more expensive than Valtrex. As far as prescriptions, WalMart will be your best bet for filling them regardless of where you are. I'd recommend you go in and meed with one of their pharmacy techs and have them explain the program to you right in the store. I haven't used it yet, but I know people who have and have saved a bundle. For filling them out, you might want to stop by Planned Parenthood. They have a sliding scale for appointments, and could take a look at your blood test results and fill those out.

Ok, you have HSV1. So does about 80% of the population. That's no big deal. You DO NOT have HSV2. Your blood tests confirm that. There's no need for you to do any more blood testing as you are beyond the window periods, and no other illness or disease will affect that or slow down seroconversion and the production of HSV antibodies. What you haven't confirmed is whether you have HSV1 orally or genitally. Did you get cold sores as a kid? If you did, there is no way you have it genitally. It's just not medically possible to reacquire HSV1 genitally as an adult. The possibility of that happening is in the millions to one range. It's that rare. I strongly suspect your vaginal issues are not in any way related to HSV. In fact, all of the issues you describe having sound more anxiety and stress related than they do to anything caused by HSV. IF you develop a blister of some type which can be swabbed, then I would recommend you have it tested to determine if it is caused by HSV. If you are still concerned, don't go to your family doctor. Go to a gynecologist who has expertise in lady parts. Going to a family doctor to confirm genital herpes is a lot like going to an electrician to fix the plumbing; they might know a thing or two about it, but they're not specialists at fixing the pipes.

Tell you the same thing my mom told me as a child; stop playing with it. It probably is just a stye. Not everything is herpes, but like the Dancing lady said, have a doc take a peek and see what they can see.

I know almost every one of us here who gets the HSV2 diagnosis automatically thinks "OMG..what about HIV." And, we all know that there is some correlation between the two because the blisters can make it easier to transmit the bad boy of STD's. I know that reality has kept a lot of us up late at night which is why I'm sharing this. I came across this article tonight and it's an interesting approach that these folks are taking towards vaccine development. It's not quack science, has some big name degrees backing it, and it's an interesting approach that could lead to developments in other areas of vaccine research. The RT articles covers the approach in detail, just be careful at taking the article at face value as most RT articles tend to play fast and loose with facts as they see fit. But, I think overall this one summed things up pretty well without too much spin from other articles I read on it. http://rt.com/news/free-hiv-aids-vaccine-113/ If this works, it could push big pharma out of the way and put the power of vaccine development back into the hands of private researchers who are eager to solve the problems rather than make a buck. I know for the long-timers there's an overwhelming sense that big pharma's holding vaccine development back because they're just not profitable. I agree, and so do the folks at the Immunity Project. If this works, the approach they're trying could one day be applied to HSV infections as well. After all, they're harnessing the power of the immune system to do this, and we all know it's the power of the immune system that keeps the HSV from ruining our weekend dates. This could be one more building block in the vaccine puzzle. So, if you're interested and haven't already seen this, take a look at the research, the people behind it, and if you have a few bucks, toss 'em their way and let's see where this goes. I just sent 'em a few and figure what the heck; it's a lottery ticket and if they hit the numbers just right, we all win. I also know there's at least one highly paid 23 year old in this forum with a brand new job who just might throw 'em a 10 spot, too. http://www.immunityproject.org/

Yay! Good for you! Congratulations and do yourself a favor. Print what you just wrote out, tuck it in your purse, and if you ever have a down day, pull it out and give it a glance.

It varies for us all. My first OB was damn near silent and I had only one blister that I only noticed when it was healing. Second OB looked like Freddy Kreuger had gone to town on my private bits and I was sicker than a dog for over a week. Since then I've had prodomes constantly, but no blisters. It varies for us all. But, it should settle down in time. A month? Two months? No way to know. Hang in there.

Calm down. Relax. Here's the skinny. Breathe before you read any further. Yes, having HSV2 does put you at greater risk for contracting HIV. That is true for the following reasons. Synergy means that having one makes it easier to get the other; it doesn't mean that if you get one, you will get the other. 1. Blisters/open wounds provide easy access to the blood stream for HIV to enter. Since HSV1 and 2 cause blisters that can open, you have to be careful. 2. Even after blisters heal, the white blood cells remain under the skin ready and waiting to heal the wound if it opens again. They stay there forever... These are the cells that HIV likes to invade. The more cells that are present, the more cells that can be invaded. 3. There was ONE study that showed HSV2 infection causes an increase in HIV viral load within the blood. It was a slight increase. There have been other studies that have not shown this correlation. It is a hot topic of debate and scientists aren't really sure. 4. HSV1 is primarily oral. HIV does not like the mouth and saliva neutralizes the virus pretty effectively. It's why kissing is not considered a risk factor. As a result, HSV1 is not considered a major risk factor for contracting HIV. Also, performing oral sex is considered a very, very low risk activity for HIV. Performing oral on a woman is considered to be an almost no risk activity as the vaginal secretions at the entrance to the vagina don't usually contain high levels of HIV; the most infectious is inside the vagina near the cervix. Giving a blow job is considered only a slight risk because pre-cum and ejaculate can contain HIV in high levels. This is true whether HSV is present or not. Trust me, I've asked a lot of doctors on this one lately. Of course, if you're going downtown with a cold sore, that risk increases a little bit.

Hi Dawn, as a single guy, newly diagnosed, this gives me hope reading this. I know a lot of the other guys and gals reading through this forum are thinking the same thing. We're all wishing you and your guy an amazing relationship and he's lucky to have met a woman like you. Trust me when I say he knows that more than he's going to be willing to admit. Sounds like you found "a keeper." As to your questions, 1. Yes, you can get HSV2 orally. It's rare, but it does happen. So, for added protection, get those li'l flavored condoms, slather 'em with chocolate, strawberry's, whip cream, whatever and have fun. But, know that if you don't use a condom, there is a risk. I strongly believe I acquired it from a blowjob. 2. If you do contract HSV2 orally, the recurrence rate (outbreaks, blisters) will be very, very rare. In fact, it is not uncommon for HSV2 orally to show up once and never show up physically ever again (if it ever shows up at all). When either HSV1 or HSV2 are out of their normal "zones" they tend to be very, very quiet. 3. Showers can reduce the risk of transmission, but they won't eliminate it. Herpes is most often passed during skin/skin contact when no symptoms are present during what is called asymptomatic viral shedding. Friction rubs it in, and voila! infecta mundo! So, unless you two want to stare at each other from across the room, you're gonna have to touch. Touch, and well, you might get it. While it's fun to do the pokey pokey in the shower or the bath from time to time, there are going to be times when the kitchen table, living room floor, bed, porch swing, backseat of the car, elevator, back pew in church, are also going to be fun and showering won't be an option. 4. If your guy is on suppressive medication, and you guys use condoms, and you guys avoid sex while he's shedding, your chances of acquiring this go way, way down. Not everyone knows when they are shedding, but your guy probably has a good idea by now (most of the time). It's a problem we all deal with. That said, can he sleep next to you buck ass naked? Sure. Could that result in transmission while you're spooning and snoring? It might. But, note there are plenty of couples who have been together for decades, done just that, and never transmitted it to the - partner. 5. Are you weird for thinking about "getting it over with" and getting it? Nope. Not weird at all. Many couples like yours say "I love you, it's part of you, I'm marrying you for life, if you have it, and I get it, no big deal." That said, your guy is going to be carrying some heavy baggage right now. It burrows into your heart. You know that. So, he's not going to want to "give you this." He loves you and he's going to do everything he can to protect you. That said, I'd try not to get it, but, make sure he knows that if it happens that you aren't going to be bothered by it one bit and you're going to love him just as much as you did before. Also, keep in mind that about 80% of people who acquire HSV2 never show symptoms. So, even if you do get it, you may never know unless you get tested and it shows up. 6. As they say, don't make nothing, won't be nothing. If herpes isn't a big deal to you, make it clear to him. In time, it'll become less, and less important to him. Eventually, it won't even be a blip on the radar. Focus on the other things in the relationship and let herpes be nothing more than the topic that opens the door to true and lasting companionship and love. Sounds like you two already have a solid foundation that your going to build a lasting relationship upon. Best wishes!

Genital HSV1 is among the fastest growing STD's in America. You're far from alone, don't sweat it, don't beat yourself up too much. Your HS health teacher probably didn't cover it; I know mine didn't and most of ours on this forum didn't. Yeah, you probably got it from a boyfriend who went downtown. Happens. Condoms are a must, period. Until you're in a monogamous, both been tested for everything, well, put the Trojans to work. Your lovers can contract HSV1 orally/genitally from you if they don't have it already. Most people have it by college, or get it in college. It's just the way it is, and by the time you hit your 40's, about 80% of America has HSV1. That said, HSV1 genital will shed far less frequently than HSV2 genital. Your transmission risk to a partner who doesn't already have it will be much less, but not nonexistent. So, ask your partners if they get cold sores. If they do, well, bon appetit. If they don't, you're going to have to have a talk with them and explain things. Also, remember right now your infection is brand new. You probably have it orally as well. I say that because most below the belt sessions begin with a nice make out session first to get the motor running. If your partner transferred it to you genitally, you've probably got it orally, too.

No, HSV1 or HSV2 should not be disqualifying factors. I think the only one that is, is HIV. As long as you're in the clear for that one, you should be just fine. To be safe, call a recruiter (not the one you are using) and ask them what they say to do. I don't believe they even test for it. That said, you will want to have it on your medical records so that if you need medication you can get it. Plus, if they find out you had it before enlisting and didn't include it in your ongoing medical conditions list, it can be reason for discharge. I spent years overseas next to a military base in Asia. There were more bugs floating around that place than a landfill; I know they won't kick you out if you contract something while in service, so I don't see why they would if you go in with something.

You know dating is hard enough as it is. It's even harder online, and I decided to go join one of the leper colonies last week. Yeah, yeah, don't say it 'cause I know you've thought about it...if you haven't already done it, too. Now, fortunately for me I work for myself and can work wherever there's an internet connection. That means that should something spark and an interest develop, I could go anywhere in the world and see where it goes. That means I'm not really tied to any geographic location, which is a great feeling right now and opens that dating pool up considerably. I feel a little like Jack Dawson right now, just tell me where to set the notebook up and I'll go to work.* But, I digress, and honestly, at 36 I'm ready to settle down and share a life with someone. I've been here, done that, lived some amazing adventures, and well, that one just feels like it's the time to do that. So, I'll give online dating a try. *I do not portend to be able to draw like Jack Dawson, and in fact, if I tried to draw a naked woman, it would most likely resemble something from Picasso's "I've had way too much Sangria and here's a stick figure" period. Also, unlike Jack Dawson, I did not go down on the Titanic, she went down on me, which is why I ended up in the friggin' leper colony to begin with. But, again, I digress. So, I'm filling out the profile on this one site, and there's about 50 different questions they ask about personality, habits, interests, likes, dislikes, goals, dreams, favorite foods, sexual fetishes, age, height, you name it. It's a big list and you have to fill it out before you can sign up (Oh, yeah, you know what I'm talking about, don't deny it.) And it hits me; STD's is only one line. It's one little line. Now, granted, it's a big line, but the other lines gang up on it and beat it down to size. And, it was hard to fill that line out. I actually wept when I did it. I actually cried filling that line out because it was confirmation that my old life was over. The old me was DOA. I felt like I was putting a big "markdown" sticker on my forehead and placing myself in one of those dollar bins that you see in front of the check-out line at Walmart. I felt like I was filling out a bloody obituary and the real hard thing is I know the exact date to put on the tombstone. Then, of course, I looked at the pretty pictures while I was there. Come on, I'm a guy and we all do it. I honestly do that mainly because I can look at a picture and tell a lot about a woman. For instance, I use my Japanese Samurai picture for my profile. I'm adventurous, love to travel, like Asia, and I'm bald just like the Samurai. It tells a lot about me. So, I look for women who might be a match for me. Not a match for my STD. Plus, right now I have a soon to be ex-boyfriend who's probably going to come looking for me in the next few days, so yes, I am looking for my suit of armor because if I look like Chuckie Norris doesn't scare me, he might leave me alone. Then I get to reading the profiles. And, they're the same as on the regular dating sites. With the exception of the sob story. And, we all have the sob story. It's the same sob story; "I had sex, and..." Or, "Someone lied to me, and..." Or, "I have an STD and I don't want to be alone." I actually wasn't interested in the profiles that included the sob or the S.O.B. story. The ones that interested me were the ones that didn't. And, I'm thinking to myself, you know, this isn't me. It's not. I am not herpes. Granted, my penis and I disagree on this toxic topic right now and he's still quite pissed, but we'll work it out. We'll get a hand on things and move forward over the next year. By Easter we should be back on speaking terms and I already know Valentine's Day is going to involve jewelry of some kind. This year I'm going to Jared, there's just no way around it and I've already picked the watch out. And, with all these realizations I left the leper colony. I am not damaged goods. I am not a virus. I am not someone who needs to be sheltered away on some CDC funded island with barbed wire and stigmas all around it. I'm still me. I still have the same dreams, goals, wants, desires, ambitions, and hopes that I had before herpes came into my life. I'm just virally enhanced, and it'll learn to fit in with the 20 billion bacteria, fallible organs, bodily noises, and other things that make me human. Granted, some women might not like that. I don't care. I'm not going back to the leper colony. Tonight I decided I'm not a leper, and that's just the way it's gonna be.

You're fine. No shedding. Go get the job!

Go get 'em! Good luck! You're going to do awesome! The job is yours. You're going to walk into that room strong, tall, and confident. Not a damn thing is going to stop you from convincing those interviewers from giving you the job. Not hell. Not high water. Nothing! You're not going to take no for an answer. TAKE NO PRISONERS! Now, get the heck off this forum and focus on the interview!

I'm willing to bet my baseball card collection you'll be just fine. You're not going to break out after missing just one pill, or even two. Like I said before, I really don't think your body needs you to be on supressive therapy based on your other posts and the fact that it's HSV1. If you're really, really, super duper concerned, take your pill this morning as normal, take another one tonight. Make sure you don't exceed max dosage as prescribed on the bottle. Then, go buy a lotto ticket because your odds of winning are about the same as you having a breakout over this missed pill. But, if you do win know that I'd like a monkey. Work's kicking my butt right now and I could use an assistant that's willing to throw feces at my editors.

Right now you're still trying to confirm what you have. Cross the bridges one at a time. If you do have HSV2, you should know there are plenty of couples who have had sex over the years and never passed it to one another even though they did the mattress mambo without a little latex barrier between them. If that happened, you're lucky but not alone in that. Of course, if you do have HSV2, then the source of your infection is the mystery.

Oh, you are so screwed. You should have followed the directions more carefully. Right there in the fine print on the bottle it says that if you miss a dose you might develop hairy palms, a tail, a love of bananas, and a third eye. I'm so sorry you're going to have to go through that. But, look at the bright side. You'll be able to climb tall trees and your impeccable vision will make it possible for you to spot far off objects for the rest of the mutant colony. Take a breath. You'll be fine. I promise. Again, you have HSV1 genitally. Missing a dose isn't going to cause a Freddy Kreuger incident (BTW, that's what I call mine now). Don't double up; there's no need. Just get back on your suppressive therapy as normal.

Getting HSV2 via a non-sexual route would be extremely, extremely unlikely. We're talking ranges of millions to one. With a test showing up at a 5, unless your name is Michael Smith and they've confused your test results with someone else's, I don't think you're looking at a false positive and would expect your follow-up test will also show up positive. Given the fact you say you've had no other sexual partners, I'm sorry because you've no doubt figured out what that means. Is it possible to not have outbreaks? Yeah, about 80% of HSV2 positive people don't. That's how this li'l bug spreads so easily.

Did you pay for the tests? If you paid for the tests, raise holy hell and tell them they'd better light a fire under 'em. I don't have a lot of sympathy for doctor's offices in the US anymore for the very reasons you're frustrated with yours today.