MMissouri

Yes it can. It's transmitted by skin to skin contact just like herpes. You can lower your risk by wearing a condom, but it is not 100%. Any area outside of the condom can still transmit the virus. Almost all sexually active people will get a strain of HPV at some point in their lives. And like herpes, signs and symptoms of the virus do not have to be present to transmit it. Most people don't even know they have it. Getting a simple pap smear could tell you if you have it. (It is usually reflexed to HPV regardless of your sexual history because of the fact it is so common, and has cancer causing strains.) I didn't mean to imply that you have HPV, just that it might be a possibility. It could be many things, but at this point we are just guessing. Your best bet is to get tested and try not to worry.

I completely agree with hippyherpy on this one. If you weren't having issues with not disclosing you wouldn't even be here. Something inside is making you seek the strength to disclose. (That's how it seems at least). When you are at the point in your life where you want a relationship, I think 100% that you should tell your potential partners that you are positive. My reasoning being that they have the potential for becoming a long term relationship-risks go up with repetitive exposure. You're building trust. I could go on and on! It's natural/best when you're building a foundation of something long term to build it the right way from the start. But I have to admit, casual sex is a gray area for me. I don't plan on having any one night stands so I don't really think much about disclosing with them. It's easy to post it's the right thing to do, but... Odds are those partners that are having one nighters are exposing themselves to STDs on a regular basis. And it's partially their responsibility to protect their sexual health as well. Anyways. You're aren't the only one to bring up this subject. The entire point of a one night stand is to have a fun sexual encounter without all the responsibility attached to it. That being said- there is your sexual health to consider now too. You are now at a higher risk of contracting anything they may have. You're being forced into the reality of the consequences of sex, and unfortunately, have to figure out how you want to proceed. You can continue on having wild crazy responsibility free sex, and deal with the repercussions that may happen. Or you can be a responsible for your sexual health (yours, not just theirs) and have an open up front communication with them from the get go. It doesn't have to be a soul baring moment, just an adult conversation about the risks of sex. And although this statement may sound cold- if you aren't there for anything but sex, then who cares what they think of you. On to the next.

I'm going to give you another scenarios for you to consider while you're working through your diagnosis. Like a girl that gets it her very first sexual encounter, or someone that has never had intercourse but gets it from oral sex. I'm sure you would not look at any of those situations and think that they are dirty or soiled- or got what they deserved for being sexual beings. Try to use that same kindness for yourself.

I've never heard of someone immediately having an outbreak like that (within 24 hrs) so I would guess you simply came down with an infection and are linking it to the sex, which most likely had nothing to do with it. Odds are you were exposed to some type of virus within a few days prior to having sex (the flu like symptoms). If you really want a peace of mind, get the blood test. A positive doesn't mean she gave you herpes, simply that you've got the virus. And just a warning for future sexual encounters- it doesn't matter if she's slept with 1 or 100 people. Heck, she could be a virgin with cold sores and give you genital HSV1. Use this as a chance to brush up on your STD facts.

Flesh colored bumps make me think of HPV (as in the strain that causes genital warts) and not HSV. It could be nothing or something minor. I had a friend get bumps from a yeast infection. Try not to freak yourself out and get tested. It does not sound herpes like to me, if that helps any.

I understand your lack of trust in doctors, but you may need antidepressants, and they are the only ones that can prescribe them. I would go to a general practitioner and talk about your symptoms. If you are worried about being put into a mental health unit, then don't mention suicide. Tell them how you are finding it hard to get by on a daily basis. Sleeping constantly, not caring about hygiene etc. These are common signs of depression and sometimes we need a little extra help to get going again. I do think you should look into therapy as well. I know that you are trying to avoid all this, but I just wanted to make it clear that I think your first step should be getting professional help. As for getting better on your own, it is not easy, and although it's possible, you really have to commit to changing your life and thought processes. If you can get to the point where you are feeling a little better and a little more in control, then maybe you can then reach out to the doctors to get the help you need. I'm not the therapist type. I have sympathy for people up to a point- but then I tend to lose patience and want to throttle them into reality. LOL. If you don't mind someone that may tell you to wake the hell up and do something with yourself, feel free to private message me. But I feel I should add the disclaimer that if you want someone to sympathize with you and tell you how everyone in your life is in the wrong (help victimize you) then I'm not your girl. Best of luck

I don't blame you for not feeling forgiving at the moment. And maybe it'll help if you look at this in another way. The entire situation shows you how they deal with things. One walked away without being upfront with his reasons, and the other one got angry and blamed you. I realize everyone reacts to news differently, but those reactions tell us a lot about the person. I really think you're going to be okay-you've already started to work this out on your own. Everything you said in the last paragraph is spot on. And while you are healing, you can help others if you'd like. I think that helping others work through something that you are also dealing with is a different type of therapy.

You're welcome :)

I love these kinds of posts! So glad it went well!

It sounds like a skin irritation of some sort/rash. Keep us updated!

It doesn't sound like herpes to me, more like a cyst/pimple type thing. But those can get infected if you're not careful. I agree with Adrial, get it checked.

That is some crazy shit. That he said that, that is. Any doctor can order any test that he needs to, and just because it isn't on his computer doesn't mean squat. That just means they removed it from their normal test list. He is still perfectly able to request that test through any reference laboratory- and most herpes tests are sent out anyways. Odds are they changed the way the tests are being ordered. For example, we order some labs in our main screen (which is what he's referring to) and some are requested the good old fashioned way- with paper and a pen.

The disclosure doesn't have to be pressure to commitment, but simply being a responsible adult in regards to STDs. You could bring it up in a factual way- like saying something along the lines of "since I feel we are at the point where sex is imminent, I think it's time we talk about STDs". You will want to know his history as well. The last time he was tested, etc. A lot of times we get so wrapped up in the fact we may transmit something to someone else, we forget they may also have something that they could give us. Sometimes people bring up cold sores as a start. Or have their facts memorized about transmission. The more factual/confident you are seems to help. You can do a disclosure search. Reading others experiences might help you figure out what works best for you.

Look up seroconcordant couples. It seems like the general idea is if you both have the same strain, you can't reinfect the other. It's still recommended that you abstain during active outbreaks, but I think this is more for the discomfort most people feel during an outbreak, and not for transmission reasons. I don't know any statistics on possible external exposure causing outbreaks in asymptomatic people (it sounds as if your HSV1 is asymptomatic since you've not had oral outbreaks). I guess it's really based on what you are comfortable with. Hope that helps.

If it makes you feel any better at all, I've known quite a few people with bipolar disorder, and they have had many relationships. I'm not saying everyone will accept it (or herpes for that matter) but the ones that run are running for a reason. And that reason isn't you- It's fear, or lack of commitment, or something along them lines. Really think about it..Would they stick around if you lost a limb? Were diagnosed with cancer? Found out you couldn't have kids? These things happen everyday, and we can't control them. There are so many things life can throw at you, and you just have to be strong and carry on. If the new guy rejects you because of your situation, just remember, you found him, and there will be others. And work on loving and accepting yourself more. It really does help.

I have a friend that has outbreaks in the same area. It's essentially the same as an oral infection from my understanding. If you are worried about spreading the infection to other areas during an outbreak by washing, you could use a separate rag for your face and body. Honestly, the soap and water should kill the virus, but do what makes you feel more comfortable. Unless you are playing with the blisters themselves, there really isn't any reason to obsess over hand washing, etc. Maybe after you become more aware of how the virus reacts for you, you'll be more comfortable. Pin pointing when you contracted it is a little harder, the negative 7 months ago is a good start, but you have to take into account any sex you had during the 3 month period before testing. (They always say that any encounter during the past three months before testing may not show up on the test). As for your partner, he could get an IgG type specific blood test. A swab would be useless since he isn't having outbreaks. I would get him tested and see what the results are. If he is positive, then there really is no need to change your sex life. Just be mindful of outbreaks and abstain during that period. If he's negative, then you'll want to take precautions with oral in the future (It's really up to you guys what risks you are willing to take). Did you notice any tingling in the area before the blisters appeared? My friend with the same type of outbreaks says she feels a creepy crawling feeling right before. If so, you'll at least know when your outbreaks are coming. Best of luck!

I think that "just sex" for girls still has an intimacy to it (if it's a er..fuck buddy) we still have some type of expectations (Whereas a one night stand is different). I don't think guys really view it the same way (emotionally it's easier for them to walk away). I could be really wrong about the above. But that's been what I've noticed. And maybe herpes wasn't the only reason they walked away. The one that went silent on you still communicated for awhile. Maybe he found another buddy. Who knows? It's still ignorant of him but ya know.. The second one sounds like an ass in my opinion. He was angry, I get that. But grow up a bit and if you are choosing to take a risk afterwards (Even with alcohol and condoms) then take some responsibility for the consequences. SO it broke, that was NOT on you. Anyways, it seems like you have a lot going on emotionally-rape, herpes, and now two guys that have left for whatever reason. The relationships don't sound healthy to me (I'm old now and I see red flags at the behavior because it's just opening yourself up for more hurt, just my thoughts.) You can have casual sex, but if it's casual, then keep them boundaries up. Anyways, how are you feeling lately? Hanging in there?

Are you making sure you're well lubed? The meds are possibly still helping with duration and severity of the outbreaks, so I wouldn't cut them back just yet. Friction and not having continuous sex is probably the issue. I used to have this problem, but it slowly went away. Good luck!

YAY!!! So glad things are progressing in a good way :)

Everyone has something they would consider a strike against them. It could be they are deeply in debt, weigh issues, criminal past, health issues, disabilities, crazy families, weird fetishes..(I could go on and on!) You are not alone in having something else you feel has put more than one strike against you. Just remember, they have their issues too. They might not be apparent, but they wouldn't be human if they didn't have some kind of "issue". (Hope that makes sense, rushing to get ready for work)

I've also read many stories where people are asymptomatic for years. Then you have those people that test positive and never have an outbreak. I'm wondering maybe if it has to do with your immune system/the sex you are having at the time of transmission. Or maybe their symptoms are just so mild they don't realize they are having an outbreak. (Like perhaps internal ones, or a simple bump that's explained away). Like Katidid said, there is no cut and dry answers, just "usually" this happens. But that doesn't mean always.

I would say that in order to heal you need to figure out what you want in life. If you want the non-exclusive relationships, partying (drinking), come and go type thing, then there isn't really anything to say about the above other than to move on. Because, frankly, if that's what you want, it usually ends regardless of how or why. Not saying that makes it less painful, but there's no commitment there. No firm relationship, regardless of how fun it is. Make any sense? If you want something more, then you need to hold out for something more. I'm really hoping this doesn't come across as being judgmental. I've done the whole fun and sex thing, and that is essentially all it is, and people don't stick around. I think you need to do some soul searching. Answer some tough questions. What exactly do you want right now, what is best for you, and what is going to be better for you in the long run?

The CDC is a website that will most likely have more reliable information.

Make a call and tell the dr that your symptoms are much worse and that you want something for them. I had antivirals and pain meds for my first outbreak. They helped immensely! And I never needed them again afterwards (Although i did take antivirals during pregnancy). The outbreaks should get better as you go. Meaning in a year they'll most likely be a minor nuisance. In my experience, the first was by far my worst. Edited to add: you might want to look into L-lysine. It wouldnt hurt to give it a try.

I threw myself into a panic attack also. Most of them images look like any other typical rash! Scary! Did they not give you pain medication of some sort? Or recommend something for the pain? Look through the forum for suggestions on dealing with the outbreaks. There are some ways to treat the symptoms from the outside that may give you a little relief. Hugs!! If it helps, we will be here regardless of the test results. Try not to worry too much.