Bambina3

I wouldn't say one word until you know for sure you have it Good luck

Even if you go to hr, it becomes. He said she said game. Gossip is everywhere My ex did the same to me with my hpv diagnosis after our breakup..he went around telling basically anyone that would listen that I had this std. Fast forward with my hsv1 and 2 diagnosis, only 2 people in my real world know, both trusted friends of 25 plus years....it's for the above experience, I'm in the closet.

I'm so sorry to read this, everyone reacts differently to this disease, and the amount of outbreaks vary also, it's tricky. What I can share is my initial ob was the same, over 30 years ago (I'm 49) I was covered, in pain, couldn't pee, could hardly walk, and back then the only thing on my chart was perianal ulcers...I know now based on several medical opinions, it was my initial. Since then, I have had not one noticeable ob, until a year ago, when I was officially diagnosed, ans wven rhen, I just thought it was yeast infection or uti. I pray your path is similar But if it's not, consider daily therapy, I've read lots of success stories with it.

It wasn't my kids, but their friend that said that to me, disrespectful punk no longer allowed at my house....but yes, same concept They are all in the early 20s and uneducated Your right, fuck the stigma and stick with the facts If I could thank your post, I would have ;)

Im sorry to hear this but.... Kudos to you for disclosing !!!

@himingGirl I agree, I hope someday tone the woman to help change the world, but so far not yet.... Some people don't realize, words hurt, and can stick with a person for a lifetime. I haven't blurred my diagnosis yet, but have come really close. Recently I had a house full of young adults, including my children....they had a debate going on about using public toilet seats and catching stds...(convo arose when someone said they were at a concert and wouldn't use public restroom) They went on to say Clamydia, gonnerahha, and herpes can all be caught from sharing a toilet seat....of course I rebutted, stated facts, facts no one wanted to hear...it was me against them...even after I pulled it up on net, they rebutted with a net article that said rarely, but possible....my insides were screaming "you have been sharing one with me and no one is infected!!!!!!!" But I didn't. Then, because I engaged in that conversation and stuck up with the facts....a few days later I got into an argument with one of them and they said right to my face "your probably an aids infected whore". I am tearing writing that now. The stigma is real, and it's hurtful. Not only to me, but to everyone infected with something.

You are referring to your past x, before your 21 year marriage that slept with strippers? Still a mute point. HSV1 and 2 are tricky to try and figure out...Can you request a blood test?? I would...you can tell. by your numbers if it's a recent infection (will convert to positive 3 to 6 months after exposure)once positive its positive, and no time frame can be established to date of infection. I am hsv1 and 2 positive....type 2 for approx 31 years... Long story short, my diagnosis was just confirmed 1 year ago August, but I remember what we (my doctor and I )think was my initial outbreak decades ago. So yes, it's possible...some people never show signs or have an outbreak, while others have difficulty. There is no consistency to this disease.

I have a few things to vent about (I'm long over due) First, now that hsv1 and 2 have touched my life, I am more aware of my surroundings, and to be honest, I have never heard of h before my diagnosis, but only in the cold sore sense, not genital. Now, I've been subjected lately to the stigma surrounding hsv2...the talk of "you don't know what she has, probably herpes" referring to someone promiscuous. And "I'd never touch someone with h"....I've tried to deflect and inform, but unsuccessfully. I still have not come out of the closet with my diagnosis, so it makes it difficult. Also, ignorance in the medical field surprises me....I went to a planned parenthood out of my area towards the major city for 2nd opinion. Today I called my local pp to set up std testing for a friend....I specifically asked about hsv2....she said they make a clinical diagnosis based on visual....I asked no swab? She replied not usually, I said no blood test, she replies not usually...so they are diagnosing on visual only??? Ommyword !!! I've also talked to 2 women in the single field (the last 7/10 days for me have been trying. ... They do not know eachother, I am the only common link We discussed being back in the single arena....my analaztion of both conversations were they were not as afraid of contracting hiv as they were hsv2, with the drugs in place now I don't even know what to say .,,,,,,,,

I understand your anxiety....I am infected with both 1 and type 2....posts like this make me sad, reminds me of the stigma attached to this disease...but I don't blame you, if I didn't have it, I wouldn't want it either. Like stated above, sounds emotional, just ease your mind and get tested. I know, easier said than done

There are a lot of success stories on this site for you to read Good luck, hugs !

I did not read above how you know she is hsv2 positive....was she tested before your relationship and again after with blood work? Culture? I ask these things because like stated above there is a chance she was infected prior to your relationship and didn't know or was not properly diagnosed...also, just because you are intimate with someone, does not mean you will transmit the virus.... I was either not properly diagnosed, or was and do not remember anything other than being young and presenting with my painful first outbreak...30 years later, and no noticeable outbreaks, I was officially diagnosed. Offering money? I agree with above, don't do it, but of course if you love her, and she is financially struggling, I am sure the help would be greatly appreciated, regardless of her hav status. Good luck

I personally think he is being selfish, doesn't really know what love is, and is uneducated about hsv. You have more courage than I, by opening up to him about your status....this does not prevent you from having babies, nor living a sexual fulfilling loving life...I've had 3 healthy babies vaginally.... It sounds like you really love him, and he sounds like he's only feeding you words. I'm sorry, time is supposed to heal, you sound strong, confident, and loving. Good luck

Stop the meds I've only had one noticeable breakout that I'm aware of in decades, and I don't take any drugs Certainly consult your physician

@rutto0803 Unfortunately 2legit2quit has not been on in a long time, maybe someone else can help you

I have been doing lots of reading since my diagnosis with conflicting items in relation to transmission Here is my question I've supposedly had hsv2 for decades, hsv1 unknown...I've only had one minor outbreak that I'm aware of, and that was the point of my official diagnosis over a year ago...I'm aware of shedding causing transmission, but they say as time goes on, shedding lessons, therefore transmission lessons...I'm not on any antiviral therapy... So considering the years I've had it, etc, does that mean my risk of transmission is extremely low? Lower than the stats at this point? Just wondering.

Just concerned help hasn't checked back in yet, hope all is ok, you have support here, we have been in your shoes on some level

Although I could be wrong, from what I read, it's harder for women to transmit it to men, than visa versa

I found out a year ago August I am positive for 2 and then 1, for probably 30 years....i was overwhelmed with emotion....it has settled, but I definitely have my days. All the same concerns you share, I also shared...but being infected 30 years, 3 children, thank God it's never been passed on nor infected to other parts of myself.

@scarredforlife I'm sorry if I'm asking questions that you might have answered, I did read most of this thread...first, hsv1 and 2 are not part of the standard std panel, you have to specifically ask for it, -and even then most doctors do not feel it necessary to administer the test unless symptoms are present (my experience)....also, just because he had an ob, doesn't mean he was your giver...hsv2 is tricky and can be transmitted without any symptoms...if you've had sex in the past, and not asked specifically for the test to compare results before and after partners, you cannot prove where it came from. Also, I really don't want to hear we are victims...we made choices, maybe we were at fault for trusting, but we made the choice to put ourselves at risk for contracting this disease...I am positive for hsv1 and hsv2....I always had the choice of protecting my sexual health, and I failed..I know condoms are not 100 percent, but it's close. I'm sure you already know most of this I blame no one but myself for my diseases.

Hsv1 can be acquired way back in childhood, and transmitted genitally thru oral.....you'll never know really how you contracted it, but I bet your husband is positive. Good luck

I am vegetarian, and I've only had one outbreak that I'm aware of in 30 years...I have not avoided any specific food...but as you know, hsv can effect everyone differently...are you having outbreaks, or is this precautionary ?

I am going to chime in on this I have not disclosed either....I also have not lied....I was not asked about my sexual health in the past....why is it our responsibility to bring up the subject when it takes two to tango...I remember in the past before I knew my status I always asked if they were clean, shame on them if they lied to me...after I learned my status I was thinking "great, here I worried about them and I had something the whole time"

Welcome...sorry to hear about what is going on, but also glad you reached for help...I remember when I was first diagnosed, I would randomly bust into tears...heck I still do! But I will tell you the same thing they told me...it is very very common...most people do not even know they have it...1 out if every 6 people aged 14 to 49 are infected according to the CDC. My issue, like yours, is the stigma surrounding the ignorance of it. It most certainly does NOT define who we are...we all have made poor choices, and still might, we can try and learn from life's experiences and move forward. Your parents love you, your choice on who you tell, but I know as a parent, my love for my children is unconditional....my mom passed before my official diagnosis, I didn't have that option. Good luck and hugs xxx

@optimist ...So if you have hsv1 first, you are less likely to show symptoms after contracting hsv2?

I have to admit, after reading all this my head is spinning too...Let's take a deep breathe and start over. Western blot confirmation stated you have hsv2...years later you get a negative blood test? Western blot is most accurate, you can always ask for another western blot...you local family planning center can order it or your primary care physician. As for having 3 life long stds....I am also in the same boat you are...however after my surgery for hpv (high risk type), my paps have been negative. I for certain will never know how long I've been infected with hsv1 and hsv2.... I think decades, but was confirmed a little over a year ago. There have been plenty of times I have looked around a room and thought to myself "if you knew, would you let me use your toilet?, or would you still touch me"....Sure, it makes me sad, but somehow I've managed to put it behind me and move forward. I have not disclosed to a partner, I'm in a marriage...he doesn't know any of my status to this day. I still don't feel strong enough to tackle the stigma. Not sure if I helped, but you are not alone.