Bambina3

I've had h for 30 plus years...I just turned 50, (yuck) I was misdiagnosed back then, but I remember it clear as day, even called for my chart when I was officially diagnosed 2 years ago, and had multiple physicians agree that was my initial breakout. It was awful...I couldn't walk...I couldn't go to the bathroom...so much pain...I landed in the emergency room with perianal ulcers...I cleared up with whatever medication I was given (couldn't read it)...and I never had another recognizable symptom until 2 years ago. I have no idea if I transmitted it, if I had outbreaks, I don't know. My official diagnosis was from an internal lesion. How do you know you have that? I thought it was uti or yeast. Everyone reacts differently, there is no way to tell, h is tricky.

Sounds like he's struggling, and backed away....he may be back, I know you like him, but he may need more time to absorb this, and may not want to continue....these are struggles we face unfortunately thanks to the stigma surrounding h...honestly, if I had the option of not coming in contact with myself, I wouldn't, so I don't blame anyone for saying no. Even if I loved, I know I'd struggle. There are a couple of people on here that date, and are very successful, not only finding their true love, but also just having casual sex. When one door closes, another one will open.

Like stated above, I'd request the bloodwork to see what type and your numbers. Sure, your yeast infection could of been H, I presented with what I thought was yeast or uti, and had an internal blister. Unfortunately you might not ever know who gave it to you or how long you've had it Good luck

Yes, it's possible. My physician officially diagnosed me 2 years ago, however she thinks I've had it over 30 years. Back then, I was also in excruciating pain, couldn't walk, and presented to er with classic h symptoms/breakout. I went all those years without a noticeable symptom. Then, 2 years ago I thought I had a uti/yeast inf or something. Upon internal exam (like for a pap) he found 1 lesion healing, 1 forming, and did a culture. Without the internal, I still wouldn't know it. Everyone reacts different, but yes, you can have it, and never know. After that, still, I've had no other symptoms. Good luck.

It takes 2...I don't think it should be a legality issue if one person either asks or puts the inflection on the table prior to sex....but who am I? Lol

Bullshit, she obviously isn't medically in tune with this, and she is fabricating to get more money ..what she is saying is false, feeding into the stigma, and is shameful on her part

I am sorry to hear you go thru these struggles...I just turned 50 this year, and was diagnosed 2 years ago, they think I mos diagnosed and had it for 30 years...never the less, I too went they exactly what you are going thru....it was only recently I told my husband (we have marriage issues) and I felt freed...to go on with this emotional burden was self tormenting myself...no, I didn't tell my children, nor ever will I....some do, I just personally do not want them to know...there is a great stigma attached to it, I felt it, fell down to it...but finally started to pick myself up and realized it was rash. People with it on the lips "oh it's just a cold sore" it's no big deal...our h2 is just in a inconvenient spot. It will get better with time, I didn't think so, but I can assure you, eventually you will be free of the chains of h. Plenty of inspirational stories onsite, please browse and read them Hugs!!!

There are success stories on this site you should read for inspiration...I will admit, I also think like you...I wouldn't date me either knowing I had this...but the majority out there do not think that way. A lot view this as no big deal and eventually you will meet the right person who thinks like this Hugs.

I don't think you did the wrong thing...he didn't ask up front if you had any stds did he?? Not sure why morally most of us seem obligated to disclosure up front, when it takes two There is a small risk of transmission called H Whitlow, to the finger, particularly the cuticule, however rare. If he freaks out, I guess he should of asked right? But now that you know it's possible to go further, I'd advise disclosure if you see it heading down that path. Good luck

I'm sorry your gyno was mis informative...yes, you can have either strain genitally....I would seek an std clinic, they can help advise you better (Although I'm surprised

I agree, they are hit harder, but it shouldn't be a consideration or thought factor before having sex with someone....Many people are in the closet about things, live 2 different lives, lies, deceit, etc.

@hippyherpy I do not know the answer to that question, I'm only going by what I read. I was always worried about contracting any std, and the end result was I was a long time carrier and didn't know it. I don't agree that there is such a thing as a high risk population for any std, including hiv, hsv, or hpv etc. From working in the medical profession for most of my adult life I have seen it all, you cannot stereotype any of it.

I don't think this has anything to do with being more or less contagious or how many more breakouts you will encounter....my initial breakout was some 30 years ago, so many, painful, unable to walk like yourself, I landed in er. I did not know then it was h2. I went the next 30 years without one noticeable symptom, then one day 1 lesion appeared on the inside. Also, as far as I am aware, gave it to no one. There is really no rhyme or reason to any of this, we all react different.

I suspect your anxiety is contributing to what seems to OCD over contracting herpes (yes, I have OCD too and was devastated when I was first diagnosed) Due to false positive and negative results, to be sure, they say to wait 6 months to be tested. I recommend going to an std clinic and do that, just to ease your mind. Hang it up after that and move on. Cut yourself a break, chalk it up to a lesson, and live your life while taking precautions ;)

If you surf this site, there are plenty of success stories on dating and relationships, I think the category is to the left of the home page. Don't get me wrong, I actually do expect rejection at some point, I think it comes with the territory, but it is so common, that most people have it, and some don't even know it. I personally would never divulge it unless a strong emotional bond was formed first, but some do just have casual sex, disclose, and are fine. Good luck

Hello I wouldn't go and tell anyone you didn't have to, like a potential sex partner, current or in recent past. I created a fake phone number and did my first disclosure that way with text so he didn't know who I was...ugh 2nd was direct and face to face Good luck

@hippyherpy .....It does make sense, but trust me i did a lot of research on this whole subject For the HSV2 side of things, here are articles that explain the increased risks http://www.webmd.com/genital-herpes/guide/risk-hiv And https://www.nih.gov/news-events/nih-research-matters/why-genital-herpes-boosts-risk-hiv-infection However, saliva actually contains an enzyme that inhibits HIV, therefore, the risk of transmission is low for oral sex transmission with hsv1 (I'm sure by now you've read all this) @hikinggirl Thank you!!!!

I just wanted to respond so you so not feel alone, but not sure I'll be much help. I have h 1 and 2, I have no idea which came to me first. The research I've read states hsv1 helps protect against 2, but considering I have both,not sure I believe it. For peace of mind just retest. Ooo and yes, everyone reacts differently, so yes 2nd outbreak can be worse I went almost 30 years before another noticeable outbreak, which prompted my official diagnosis.

If your insurance will cover it (and you may need a referral) it wouldn't hurt to see a specialist...however, most state std clinics can help monitor us and prescribe meds we need. Also, your primary care doctor can take care of your health needs also in reference to h.

Well, I made another huge step yesterday and went for the mouth swab hiv test. It came back negative thank God. Once I was diagnosed with h2 then h1, I read so much on how it can increase your chances of contracting other diseases particularly hiv. I have been beyond scared, and it has consumed many of my thoughts. It's easy for people to say "just go get tested" when you are already dealing with an unexpected std diagnosis. One that may be simple for some, but lifelong. Just glad my big girl panties are on and I'm slowly tackling my fears

Unfortunately it is the moral right thing to do, disclose. However, I would not blame anyone for walking...I am honest with myself, and know, that if I didn't have it, I wouldn't want it. Like it or not, it's life long and incurable....some experience nothing to mild symptoms, others painful breakouts. I have found that if there is a strong emotional connection the other is more accepting...some really don't care, take the chance and proceed with a good time. You did the right thing!!!!!

Like stated above, friend probably has it too. I definitely key more into things since my official diagnosis of 1 and 2, depending on my mood depends on how I take things.

Let it go and move on You used a condom, you were on antivirals, the risk is extremely small...hopefully you learned a lesson

@Dave What is that pic for ? You got the WTF look out of me lol

Testing is strangely not part of the standard std panel, I hope it will be, it would help with prevention