Flowerteacher55

Hello! That is wonderful news! Thank you for keeping us updated. That is hopeful news for so many who also may be hesitant to get the vaccine for fear of HSV impacts. I hope you have been doing well! Blessings, Grace

Hello! 🙂 I am so sorry to hear about your experience with HSV. I am also a college student, I am 22, and it is really frustrating to try and navigate dating and life as a student while having to deal with HSV! Please know it will be okay. It is so overwhelming sometimes, but please know you are never alone, and you can always ask questions and get support from this forum! ❤️ In regards to your outbreaks, others have shared their experiences of having outbreaks in other places besides the first primary outbreak spot, but the outbreaks are usually in close proximity to the primary outbreak area (for example, people who have their primary outbreak on their genitals may have their secondary outbreaks on their bottom, anus, crease of thighs, etc.) Having an outbreak on another region of the body is more rare, and as you said, could indicate that something else may be going on. Are you sure they are herpes sores? Do they feel/look the same as your previous sores? Have they gone through the stages of healing as your other sores? Before you noticed the sore on your hand and elbow, did you have any prodrome symptoms that you usually have when you get your usual outbreaks on your private area? Also, do you take suppressive medication, or only take medication for when you have an outbreak? IN regards to the specific sores you noticed: If they do not hurt and don't have a center that oozed, it may be a common wart, which are nothing to worry about. If you are concerned, you can go see your doctor or a dermatologist (you may need a referral for this) and get it checked out. I hope this helps! Sending blessings of health and wellness your way!! Blessings, Grace

Hey Everyone! 🙂 I hope you are well well ❤️ I wanted to just vent on here. I met someone that is so perfect! He is so smart, motivated, and we have a lot in common. He's really sweet. The only thing that kind of makes me nervous or feel awkward is the age difference. He is two years younger than me (I'm 22. he's 20). I almost feel weird because I feel like... a bad person for having sex with someone younger and then possibly giving them herpes. Like, I mean I got herpes at 19, and it was so hard for me. I don't want to give it to him and then he has to deal with it at age 20. He's so nice and kind and I am just worried. I haven't disclosed anything yet since we are no where near intimate right now, but it's just a worry that makes me a little upset and fearful. And I feel like maybe he will think I'm a bad person or I'm too much older and am "too experienced" or something like that. I feel embarrassed and scared. Thank you for listening! 🙂 Blessings! Grace

Hello! Okay, thanks for the information! It seems that this could have been a new infection. The IgG blood test usually takes 12+ weeks for antibodies to build up, but your test score was a definite positive, taken 2-3 weeks after the first sore presented itself. Perhaps giving your doctor a call might help clarify things? It's great that you stopped having relations after the sore appeared. Masturbation may have impacted the sores, but probably not. Blood tests are more accurate than swab tests because swab tests are prone to human error (the nurse/medical professional may swab too little of material to be tested, they may swab an already healed/healing sore, etc). However, blood tests such as an IgG are much more reliable, although they often take 12+ weeks for the body to build up detectable amounts of anitbodies. IgM tests are not as reliable, since they involve testing for a type of antibody that builds up significantly when you are first exposed to the virus, but soon reduces in numbers as the body builds up other antibodies. IgM tests are more prone to false negatives due to this factor. Also, please know and trust the fact that your sex life is not over. I know it may feel like that, but it is not true! You have a common virus. You aren't bad or dirty or unwanted. You are good. You are clean and pure. You are wanted and worthy and deserving of love. Hold onto these truths to get you through the rough times! 🙂 We are all here for you. Good luck with your move to PHL! Blessings, Grace

Hi!! Oh my gosh, I totally understand the overthinking! It can be so exhausting. Rest assured, it seems you are fine. I am sorry that he did not handle it very well. Remember, that shows something about him, not about you! Suppressants can impact the shedding of the virus, but it depends on the specific biochemistry effects of the specific medicine. If it helps you feel more at ease (knowledge is power!) it might be good to consult your doctor or pharmacist for more info. Stay well! Don't let the worries hold you back from being happy! 🙂 Blessings, Grace

Hi!! 🙂 Since the internal condom provides additional surface area than the external condom, it would offer more protection against skin-to-skin contact than the external condom. According to Family Planning Services/BodyTalk of Austrailia, "The female (internal) condom can provide more protection from skin-to-skin transmitted STIs [genital warts (HPV) and genital herpes] than the male condom, as it covers a larger area of the female external genitals and the base of the penis during vaginal sex." Source: https://bodytalk.org.au/keeping-an-eye-on-stis/your-best-defence/female-condom/ Remember, they mean it is effective when used correctly, so make sure that the condom is secure and being used properly! 🙂 In regards to American research, University of Michigan (https://www.uofmhealth.org/health-library/sig51936) cites two studies that explain the effectiveness of internal/female condoms at helping reduce the spread of genital herpes or genital warts. The two articles can be found by clicking the little "2" citation after reading the segment "How well do they work to prevent sexually transmitted infections (STIs)?" Honestly, SO much more research needs to be done on female/internal condoms. A lot fo the research out there is from the early 2000 to 2010s. Let's all hope that more research is done! 🙂 I hope this all helps! 🙂 Blessings, Grace

Hello!! First, I am so sorry you are under such stress. Please know it will all be okay. We are here for you! 🙂 Ugh, I am so sorry your doctor didn't call and explain the results. That is so frustrating! You can always call the office and ask to have a review of your test results. Do you have HSV-1 already/Have you had cold sores in the past? Have you ever been intimate with anyone who has had HSV-1? Sex can trigger an outbreak to occur. So, if you already had genital HSV-1 and didn't know it, it is possible that the friction triggered the outbreak to occur. It is also possible that the person you were most recently intimate with has HSV-1 AND HSV-2. genital HSV-1 is commonly spread via oral sex. The only way for her to know if she has both is if she had an antibody test done. A swab test done on her sores may have had a result of HSV-2, but that doesn't mean she doesn't have HSV-1 orally (or hypothetically sexually). Did she preform oral sex? Was your blood an IgG or an IgM test? If it is IgG, it seems you must have had HSV-1 already, as having such a high positive result of IgG antibodies would typically take 12+ weeks to build up. If it is an IgM test, it seems that it was a recent exposure to the virus. Since your first sore healed, did you remain intimate? The friction may have caused another outbreak, especially if the skin is new/sore. Also, did you notice any prodrome symptoms (burning, itching, tingling, etc) prior to the new cluster of sores? Also, have no fear about the second outbreak. If this is a new infection, it can sometimes take a little while for the body to get used to the virus, so outbreaks are more common to occur with short time in-between during the first few months of having it. It should get better 🙂! Sending blessings of health and happiness your way! 🙂 -- Grace P.S. Are you from Philly? If so, it's nice to meet a Philly person on the forum! 🙂

Hi Again, That's actually a common question many people have, and yes, it's hypothetically possible depending on place and circumstance! I believe it is characterized as "reckless" or known "endangerment" of the other person. I believe this crime is defined more in depth in each US state's criminal code. Many states have specific laws that are specific to HIV and AIDS only. However, other states also have them for STIs. For example, the state of New Mexico does not have laws specific to AIDS, but instead groups together all STIs and places knowingly passes an incurable STI unto another as a form of battery, if the person intended to give the person the STI. Obviously, I really hope no one WANTS to pass on their HSV to another. Anyways, if found guilty, punishment(s) that vary by states would occur. Blessings, Grace

Hey Friends, Let's take a step back here and breathe. This forum is meant to help and support, not cause harm and hate! Remember, we are all in this together. Let's be considerate and kind to others, and try to be a model for others who may be scared and unsure what to do and how to disclose. Make the world a better place, make positive changes in all that you do. In being honest to yourself and others, you are showing respect to yourself and to others. Do no harm. Being kind to others and yourself is possible in the herpes-disclosure scenario! Stay well, Friends! ❤️ -- Grace

Hello! 🙂 Another wonderful question! Internal condoms (female condoms) offer external protection in addition to internal protection, as they have an external ring that covers a little bit of the outer labia and the inner labia. Depending on the size of the condom, it may cover more or less skin. This protects both parties, but of course it doesn't work (nothing works) 100%. It may also provide protection because they don't break as easily as condoms. They are pretty hardy. I don't know if that is 100% true that they break less than penile condoms, but I will check into it. Also, the internal condom is also a great way to protect during anal sex as well. Here is an article from the US Library of Medicine Database about female condoms: https://medlineplus.gov/ency/article/004002.htm The internal condom is NOT as effective as the external condom (male condom) at preventing pregnancy. The effectiveness rate of the external condom is 98% while the internal condom is 95%. Here is an article from Planned Parenthood talking about the pregnancy prevention and female condoms: https://www.plannedparenthood.org/learn/birth-control/internal-condom/how-effective-are-internal-condoms I hope this helps! Also, please remember to never ever use a and internal and external condom together! The friction will cause ripping/broken condoms. Blessings Grace

Hello! 🙂 I hope you are well. That is an excellent question that many many people have asked and wonder about! In general, HSV is not passed through clothing. It is spread through skin-to-skin contact. HSV is a skin-spread virus, it is not blood-bourne, so blood doesn't spread HSV (such as AIDS, for example). If I am correct on this (friends, please correct me if I am wrong!), HSV doesn't live IN the fluids, but instead can travel via fluids. Like, the fluids are like a travel mechanism for the HSV. Kind of like they are people on a lazy river in their little inner tube thingies and the river is the fluids! They don't live there/reproduce there, but instead they use the fluids as a means of transport to spread. Does that make sense? If I am wrong, I would SO appreciate if someone would let me know! 🙂 🙂 I am not a doctor or medical professional by any means! So, if you weren't having prodrome symptoms and you didn't have any active sores, you should be good. Even if you DID have an outbreak, but you kept it covered with clothes, so, you should be good ❤️ If he touched you there but touched you with your clothes on, I think he is totally fine, even if vaginal fluids made a little wet area on the clothing/undies. Also, Let's say that he touched you in that area (no clothing as protection), and you were worried... soap and water/if he washes his hands, that is all one needs to help them stay safe! 🙂 I hope this helps. Sorry if I was confusing at all or gave bad info! Blessings, Grace

Hi! Oh I pray about everything. It's how I live ❤️ And it's not about me, its about the other person. I feel happiest and best when my conscious is clean, and when I feel like I am being honest with the person I am with. It isn't about the end result (whether I give it to them or not), but more about giving them a choice and giving them knowledge. Knowledge is power, and they should know that I can give them HSV. I might, I might not, I might and we never know, I might and then we both know. Regardless, I personally think disclosure is positive and is what I feel is respectful and ethical. @Neverwouldathought I totally understand your analogy. Yes, AIDS and HSV are different in many ways, as @Bootsychootsy said, however I think @Neverwouldathought was trying to make a point about honesty and the significance of being honest. Also, it is all relative. If I have genital HSV-1 already, and someone I am with has it, I would be happy to know, and it wouldn't bother me. If I was someone with an autoimmune issue (such as HIV), and someone told me they had genital HSV-1 or HSV-2, I would of course be so grateful they told me because there are potential risks that could happen if I contract HSV, and then I would be better prepared if something were to happen, or I could choose to not have sex with this person, etc. Basically, honesty is the best policy. Obviously you don't need to walk up to someone and say, "Hi, my name is Grace, and I have herpes." You also don't need to tell them in a friendship stage, or really at all until physically intimacy starts. It's private information. But, intimacy is private, and that is a time for private information like STIs to be disclosed. Remember that we can all relate to each other, as humans, and as people with HSV. We may differ in opinion, but we all still can support and connect with one another. May everyone be blessed and well ❤️ Blessings, Grace

Hello! 🙂 I am so sorry that you have been experiencing such intense central nervous system symptoms. The nervous system can be impacted by so many factors, herpes being one of them. It is great that you have already rules out MS and ALS, among the other possible diagnoses. I am not a doctor AT ALL, but I think that possibly, because you are on a immunosuppresive drug, your immune system could have been lowered, which then in turn could cause HSV to flare up (since your immune system isn't as strong to stop/inhibit the HSV with antibodies and such). Again, I am not a medical professional, but that may be possible (I'd ask the doctor that prescribed the Simponi, or ask a pharmacist, they are SO helpful since they understand the biochemistry of drugs). Did you start these symptoms before or after you started Simponi? Also, the tests were deemed inconclusive, so maybe a second test would help? Usually they do a spinal tap to test the spinal fluid, so if you haven't gotten that done that might help narrow things down, too. If it is due to the herpes, have you noticed any other herpes symptoms that you've experienced before? Has your herpes affected you previously (have you had very frequent outbreaks, experienced nerve pain, etc before?). If this is herpes-related, please know you are NOT alone. Many people have severe herpetic-neuralgia, so if you wanted your doctor to look into the connections between Simponi and the activation of herpes and post-herpetic neuralgia, it might help! 🙂 I am so sorry you aren't feeling well. I am sending you prayers of health and happiness! Blessings ❤️ 🙂 -- Grace

I don't! No one has ever told me if I have. But I certainly pray I haven't passed it on ❤️

Hi!!! And not that I know of (yay!) I would still disclose no matter who told me I didn't have to. Blessings, Grace

Hi Again, I hope you are well. You are of course allowed to have your opinion, as we all are. Sadly, there is so so so much we can do; take our medicine, watch for outbreaks, etc, but we cannot 100% control our HSV. Herpes is sassy in that it sheds sneakily, and even when we do everything 'right', we still can get it or give it. There is just a lot of people who have HSV because a partner knew and didn't tell them about it. And of course it can cause drama, which is stressful. Basically, it wouldn't feel good to pass it to someone and then have them say "why didn't you tell me?" Also, those who are harsh and judgmental do not deserve you anyway. Those who are kind souls deserve to have the truth told to them. It's like, someone says, "why didn't you tell me?" and you say, "it doesn't matter," and then they would most likely say, "it matters to me, though." and then.... either, "If you really cared about me, you would have been honest. you know I wouldn't have judged you. It hurts me you were ommissive knowing I could get it." or, if they are a chump they may say, "wtf you gave me herpes and you knew?" and then they'd be a jerk. But, that jerk wasn't worthy of you in the first place. So, disclosing can be a people filter to help avoid chumps. Basically, just how you want to be treated with love and respect... there are others out there just like that. People who are craving love and fear rejection. They don't deserve to not have someone be honest with them because that person doesn't want to be rejected or think it doesn't matter. Because that is relative. Plus, you never know if someone has an underlying health condition that would become exacerbated if they were exposed to HSV. Especially people with autoimmune illnesses and any neurological-based illness could really have problematic issues were they to be exposed. I understand what you mean, that the risk is still the same whether someone knowingly has HSV or not. But, the fact that you DO know, and then ommit the information, doesn't make it ethical. I am not trying to argue with you or anything, I am sorry if I sound like I am. I just want to advocate on behalf of honesty. I apologize if I have offended you in any way! Sending Blessings and Happiness Your Way! 🙂

Hello! Wow, very interesting ideas in your post. I understand where you are coming from. It's very interesting to analyze the pros and cons of choices. However, no matter how many pros come from choosing dishonesty, it still just doesn't seem right. Everyone has freewill. Freewill is what we all have, and taking away choice from someone is not ethical. Although we may not like the person's response, we still need to give them a choice. We should let them choose if they are taking a risk or not. They have a right to their own body and wellness just as we do. Giving someone a choice; to either stay with us and have intercourse, or not have intercourse, is a very very ethical thing to do. Otherwise we are lying out of omission, which is not kind. Plus, when we present someone with a crossroad, we see how they respond to situations of vulnerability and herpes-related things. This brings up your point about finding out about who someone really is; their ability to understand, be kind, be calm, and to stop and think about things before immediately accepting or rejecting us. Thank you for posting about this, because I am sure many people have had the same thought about disclosure. However, it is so so so essential to our own well-being and mental health and the person we are disclosing to to be honest and disclose. ❤️ Blessings, Grace

Hello! Great question! There are two main medication options for HSV: 1) to take only when an outbreak is suspected to happen (prodrome symptoms) or when you see sores, and 2) suppressive medication, which is taken daily. Many people take supressive medication for factor like... - being in a long-term relationship and not wanting to use a condom or worry about transmission - having other health illnesses that may increase outbreak likelihood - being asymptomatic and not knowing when you have outbreaks, so you want to try and prevent them with supressive medication - and many other reasons! People who have very rare outbreaks, aren't having sex, or don't like taking medicine may opt to take medication only when they have an outbreak or feel the virus become active. Remember, medication DOES NOT magically 100% prevent the spread of herpes. It helps work to stop the virus from being active or shedding (how it spreads). Also, it is possible to still get an outbreak while using supressive medication. Also, many people take supressive medication not for just sex reasons, but so they do not need to suffer with the pain from HSV. If you wanted to learn more if suppressive medication is right for you, talk to your doctor, and, if you have an intimate partner, talk to them about it, too. It is entirely your choice, but if it would help you feel safer physically and mentally, it may be right for you! I hope this helps!! Blessings, Grace

Hello! I am so sorry that you have been experiencing these symptoms. Besides the cloudy and smelly urine, have you had any other symptoms, such as unusual discharge, pain in the back or groin or ovary area, or fever, aches, or other symptoms? Cloudy and smelly urine without other symptoms. Would indicate many things, including dehydration and a start of a new medication. However, it is great that you took notice.of these changes in your body. Being aware of your body is important! Did you get tested for a UTI or bladder Infection? In regards to the bleeding during sex, that is a sign to stop having intercourse for right now. Also, it is best to not have sex if you do in fact have a UTI. It is awesome that you are aware of your period cycle and know it isn't for two weeks. Was the bleeding heavy, and did you happen to notice if you had any pain with the bleeding, or after sex? From what you are describing, it doesn't sound like herpes. It sounds more like a potential bacterial infection (such as a UTI or bladder infection). Since it's been two weeks of the cloudy and smelly urine, it would be a good idea to reach out to a doctor or get a urine test at a clinic or your doctors office. The bleeding from intercourse also is a sign something else may be going on, so it would be best to explain the combo of two weeks of urine cloudiness + odor + bleeding during sex. I'm sending you prayers and happy blessings of health. It will be okay! Head on over to a doctor or even call and ask a nurse on call about everything, and get a urine test, and even a physical exam if you think that would help you clear your mind and rest assured. Let us know what happens! 🌄 Blessings, Grace

Hello ☺️, I am so sorry for the emotional and physical pain and stress you have experienced. You do not deserve that at all. We are here to help and support you. You are not alone. First, you are not a danger. You are not bad. You are not dirty. You are not a hazard to those you love. You are safe. You are clean. You are good. You are a blessing. Nothing could ever change those unconditional truths. Second, obtaining herpes from an experience that was inappropriate and assaulting causes such trauma. I have my herpes from someone who was abusive, and it definitely makes me feel frustrated and sad. I have healed a lot, though, and the same is possible for you! Just remember it isn't your fault. At all. I am in the US, however it may be possible for you to contact the University of Washington Virology Division and ask them how to ship a blood sample through the mail to their lab, or how you can get a Western Blot test another way. I can look into that for you! ☺️ I am so sorry I am not of more help. Please reach out with more questions, or if you need support. You are never alone. We are all there for you. Sending prayers of healing and blessings your way!!! ☺️

Hello!! @Aria_ I am so sorry you are still struggling with the itchiness 😢! That's terrible. I'll pray it clears up! ❤️ I bought lysine cream at a holistic wellness store near me. It was a very tiny little tube but it worked wonderfully. The cream was chartreuse and smelled like lemons 😂 I think because it was a natural cream!! It was a little pricey but it is amazing. Feel better!! ❤️🌻 Blessings, Grace

Hi!! I am so sorry that the itch has persisted despite the antivirals. Usually, the itch is due to skin irritation or viral shedding, however you've been on the medicine for a month, so it seems that the virus had some lasting effects from the outbreak. Have the sores fully healed? Is there any new sensitive skin? Also, is the itching centralized in the region where the outbreak occurred, or has it/is it spreading? Also, do you see any rash or scabbing, redness, scaly skin, etc? There are topical solutions that can help with skin itching. Lysine cream works wonderfully. It is an oily ointment that soothes skin. I wouldn't reccomend putting cortisone cream on your genital region, as I am unsure if it is safe to put there. You can also try misting the area with ice water (put the ice water in a spray bottle). A cold compress also helps. You can just rest an ice pack on the area atop of your clothes while you watch tv, read, etc Avoid non-breathable clothes and any very fragranced soaps that may cause skin irritation. Also, don't shave down there, as it may increase the itchiness!! I hope this helps!! ☺️ Feel better!! ❤️ 🌻 Blessings and Happiness 🌄, Grace

Hello!! Oh my gosh!! Your journey through this has been so emotional and medically draining, but I am so so happy to hear you are working things through by confiding in others and getting a new antiviral to try! Did your partner know he had it, or was this news to him? Yes, as you said, someone can have both types of HSV, although I am unsure what percent of people have both. It makes total sense why the outbreaks got so much worse (it was a new strain and your body had to build up immunity!). Also, HSV symptoms are often more severe for those with vaginas, especially at the time of initial contact with the new strain. Also, hooray for the GUM clinic actually respected your requested and did a swab test! Although it was so frustrating and tiring to keep asking, advocating for yourself can totally work out in the end. Way to stand up for yourself! ☺️ Thank you for sharing your journey with us and updating us with this news, I'm sure others who are struggling with similar stories can find comfort in knowing it all worked out. Blessings and prayers of health and happiness to you and your partner!

Hello, Okay. Yes, even though someone may not have symptoms or an outbreak, they still have the ability to transmit the virus to others. Stay strong. Honesty is the best! Sending prayers your way ❤️ Grace

Hello! First, I am so sorry about your diagnosis. Having HSV, especially HSV-2, can come with such stigma. Remember that stigmas are societally constructed. They aren't facts. They are uneducated stereotypes and opinions. You are not those stigmas, not are you a mistake, or a dirty bad person. You are pure. You are whole. You are good. To clarify, how long have you known you've had HSV-2? before, during, or after the 4 months you've been with your current partner? Regardless, it is imperative you tell him. Love means honesty. Without honesty and respect, love cannot grow. Your partner needs to know, for his own health and wellbeing. I know it is scary to be honest about HSV, but we cannot control the responses of other. We can only control what we do and how we treat others. And, especially to someone you care about, you should treat them with respect and honesty. Also, you are so brave to share this with us, even though you fear receiving backlash (which I don't think would happen on here, folks are pretty chill). If you have been keeping this a secret since the beginning of this relationship, it might feel really scary to talk about it now. However, the sooner you talk to him about it, the better. Don't spend any more time holding this secret. Holding onto guilt is like holding on to a sack of potatoes: it holds us down, and eventually the potatoes get moldy and harm us and others. Heal your relationship! Talk to your partner. If you need advice on how to disclose HSV, please reach out, or check out the other posts on this forum. The truth shall set you free! Blessings, Grace